RAISING BLAKE

CHAPTER 35

My daughter

The last few weeks have been hectic for me. My stitches had to be redone because they got infected due to certain baby daddy who decided to pull out and come on my stomach. I've been running in and out of the hospital with bottle ad bags full if milk for blakelyn but always getting upset and frustrated becomes I'm never allowed to see her. Well until today hense why I'm sitting on maliks bed right now fully dressed and waiting for him to get out the shower so we can go.

Im wearing this

Im trying to find myself through clothes again that and all my other dresses and clothes don't evenngo over my boobs. I wanted to change my style because I don't like it anymore I've tried it with my new body but I hate it so much and I want to find jew colors that I like that isn't fucking pink cause looking at pink now makes me sick. My hairs tied up in a pony tail and I have my clear glasses on because I have feeling I'm going to cry so contacts aren't a good idea neither is make up.

The door finally opens and Malik comes out a towel round his waste dripping in water. "Malik hurry up I want to see my daughter." he mumbles walking into his closet and coming back out in black pants and a red nike top. He slides on his jordans. He grabs this brush on the side of his dresser before brushing his hair in the same directions to sort out his what he calls me wavers.

He then put a red durag on tying it back. "we can go now." he mumbles as he grabs his car keys and leave his room leaving me in there confused about his attitude. I walk down stairs and out the front door closing it behind me. Malik car engine was running so I just go into the passenger seat buckling my seat belt before carefully turning toward the window trying to not irritate my stitches.

"what's wrong with you." Malik asks with not an inch of concern in his voice. "fuck off Malik." he kisses his teeth. He drives down the road and towards the hospital in absolute silence. When he parks up I try to get out but he locks the door. "Malik let me out."
"no tell me what's wrong with you."

"you is what is wrong with me. Your so fucking on and off. Like today your taking long in the shower your mumbling your kissing your teeth your leaving me behind in your room on purpose knowing I cannot walk very fast thanks to you who gave me a fucking infection in my stitches but yesterday you were completely fine you were at my house laughing with me and my dad complimenting me helping me even when I didn't need help you were kissing me touching me couldn't get enough of me really...your messing with my feelings your making me want you yet your attitudes like today wants me to stick with co-parenting and not be in each others lives."

His body was tense frozen in place. "and whatever the fuck your doing with tia needs sorting cause you can't have both of us and I'm not gonna continue letting you fuck me whenever you want whilst your still with her and you need to sort it quick and before Blakelyn comes out of the nicu cause I don't need you toxic relationship and her racist ass in my daughters life."

I lean back in my seat in silence and let him process what I just said. After a few minute he turns the car engine of taking of his seat belt."were gonna late" he hops out the car slamming his door behind him.

What the fuck is wrong with him. He hands my my bag that's got a fee bottle of breast milk for the hospital.we walk in a the lady behind the counter smiles at us.

"hey Aiko same place as usual." She says grabbing my bag for me and I nod. "we also came to see Blakelyn our daughter." she looks confused.

"you do know that you cannot see her she's in critical condition it may put her whole life in danger." another doctors comes through the double doors. "ah miss Shu Mr Booker here to see baby Booker I'm guessing." he smiles at us ripping off surgery gloves from his hands.

"follow me" he walks through to sets of doors before taking his key card out and unlocking another set of double doors that's leads us to a room were a bunch of newborn were some crying some sleeping some just moving around. We walk past them and walk through another door that lead to like a walk path but when I turn to my right there was a window and through that window there was a baby in a plastic crib she had tubes in hers nose and coming out of her hand she was sleeping and the machines were beeping.

I gasp when I realise that's my baby. My baby girl my tears began to role down my face as I sob at the look of my daughter. There was machines and tubes everywhere and it's all my fault. The doctor leaves giving us privacy as I just sob into my hands.

Malik puts an arm around pulling me into my chest as I just cry. "it's ok Aiko she's gonna be ok were all gonna be ok and we're all going to be happy just you me and blakelyn no one else." he emphasises the no one else part.

I nod getting out of his hold, wiping my eyes and face before I look back at my daughter looking past the tubes I look at her she was beautiful she had lushes black hair with some curls forming her face was to the side facing us and she's had the cutest little button nose and the biggest puffiest lips and her eyes were closed but I could already tell she had nice eyes.

Her lips pucker in her sleep and I smile. She was 2 months old now and I thought she was gonna be small for what she's been through but she's all chubby and cute she was only in her diaper so I could see her absolutely adorable baby rolls on her arms and her legs.

"I guess your breast milk is doing her well." maliks says to me. "it is its helping her grow much faster and making her gain the weight that she needed due to her being premature and newborns don't have any immune systems yet especially the premature babys but the breastmilk allows them to share the mothers immunise system with them so thanks to your breast milk she's growing faster then we all thought."

A female doctor says as she walked into the space closed the door behind us and looked out our baby like she's was her own."oh sorry I'm doctor Taylor I'm the one who's been monitoring her and monitoring her heart beat. I also Feed her change her gives her little sponge baths. And I must say Blakelyn is the sweatest angel baby I've seen she's doesn't cry alot she just eats and sleeps and just let's us get on with out business and you two are lucky to have a baby like her."

I smile as tears well in my eyes."She didn't deserve any of this not one bit." she's says quite aggressively but yet calmly. "She didn't deserve to get an under developed heart with a whole in it due to lack of nutrition whilst she was in the womb." my throat closes as she looks at me.

"She didn't deserve a mother who didn't care for her and didn't give her the food she need and sadly fetus abuse isn't a thing here so she's going to be left to starve in the real world by the same abusive teen mother she was pared with. If I could take her home with me I would and in fact it I could get her to stay here longer just cause I know she safe I fucking would."

I stops breathing I knew this was my fault everyone kept telling me it wasn't but it really was it really was my fault. I start sobbing once again and the lady leaves. I turn to Malik but he was like stone shocked from what the woman says.

"I don't like hitting women and I know its wrong but I'm gonna beat her fucking ass." he says walking out.

Oh shit.