Everything sounds hollow to me.
Their words, your words, and even my words.
They sound like empty cans.
Fooling me with the meaningless, attractive outer packaging .
Pushing me into the pits of despair.
Where seconds, minutes, hours, day, and months bleed together into hell.
I can't get a grip of myself .
I am slowly losing control of myself.
As they push me into my inner demons.
As you push me into my inner demons.
As I push myself into my inner demon.
I can't contain all my overwhelming emotions into a little bottle you provided me.
Yet, everybody tells me I must and will at all costs.
It is about to burst like ticking bomb.
Everything must be contained and I must not be selfish for my own desires.
Expectation must be met, but why does expectation have to be met in the first place?
Why create expectations for me in the first place?
When you clearly know I can't fulfill or handle them.
Why are you watching me with such judging eyes and tearing me apart?
Why?
Too many repetitive bad days turn into months and years until time becomes numb.
A time that seems to be flow too quickly for me to process but too slow for others to process.
A senseless concept I can't wrap my mind around.
Please let me breath.
Please let me live and feel alive.
Just once, just once, only this once please.
I feel like a child who can't grow up.
Who is not allowed to grow up?
Always treated as child who only knows and causes troubles.
A child that can't decide the bad or good.
A child that must be watched over with no sense of freedom.
Like a child, I want to please, please, and just please.
Like a child, I want to be free, free, and just free.
Like a child, I want love, love, and just love.
Like a child, I want security, security, and just security.
Like a child, I want praise, praise, and just praise.
Something nobody can fulfill to satisfaction.
Like a child, I believe everybody's empty words too easily.
Making me choose between contrary decisions that will both bring me pain and suffering.
A consequence that I must face, but I can't handle.
Making me feel the hollowness either choice I decide.
Contemplating which path will bring less torture.
I know the negative criticism from either choices will break me
Especially, when nobody sees positive come out of me.
Can I be broken any more, though?
Only thing I can say is the same hollow words they spit at me daily.
Hoping it will contain the expanding, burning flames in me
That will eventually and slowly consume my heart, body, and soul.
I don't think I can ever get used to this.
I think it will kill me permanently soon.
Which I am desperating hoping it will happen ASAP
To save myself.
YOU ARE READING
Poem Cycle
PoetryThis book contains a variety of different types of poems. This book is not made up of Chapter's but the title of poems, I create. I hope you enjoy it. Please like, comment, and vote if you like my poems. Highest rating in Poetry [#235 - 10/10/17] |...
