The Flame (A Norman Reedus Story)

Chapter 86--Do You Know How To Pick Up The Pieces?

Chapter 86—Do You Know How To Pick Up The Pieces?

*Adult Content

Jenna’s POV

3pm

I slowly open my eyes and realize I’m on the sofa alone.  My head is pounding as I sit up and look around the living room.  My eyes focus on the chair across from me and I see a familiar face watching me.  I push the hair out of my face and reach for the cigarettes on the coffee table.  I light a smoke and take a large drag as I rub my temple.  I look up again and quietly say, “How long have I been asleep Saul?”  He looks at his cell and sighs, “Most of the day baby girl.  Norman and I thought it was better to let you sleep.”  I nod and take another drag before getting up off the couch.  I walk into the kitchen, making myself a cup of coffee before looking for the bottle of Motrin.  As I look in the cabinets I come across a bottle of Jack Daniels and sigh.  For some reason polishing off that bottle sounds damn good right now.  I take the almost full bottle out of the cabinet, holding it in my hand as I determine if I want to go down that road.  I mumble, “Hello old friend.  Can you still make me forget?”  I put my cigarette in my mouth, letting it dangle from my lips as I use my hand to open the bottle.  I put the cap on the counter and take the cigarette out of my mouth as I weigh my options.  I put the open bottle to my nose and smell the familiar scent of sorrow and pain.  I stare at the label again, thinking about the last time I felt like this and I sigh, setting the bottle down on the counter and replacing the cap.  I look at the bottle and whisper, “Not this time, old friend; not this time.”  I find the Motrin and take out two; going back to my brewed coffee.  I fix my coffee and pop the Motrin in my mouth, sipping the hot liquid to down the pills. 

I turn back to the living room and lean on the counter, looking back at the man watching my every move.  I give him a faint smile as I look around the room and ask, “Where’s Norman?”  Saul stands up and walks into the kitchen.  He leans on the island and looking at me, “He went to get you a new phone.  He took the kids with him.”  I nod and ask, “Did he tell the kids?”  Saul sighs, “I did after I got here.  Norm and I decided just to tell them about the fire, nothing else.”  I sigh, “Thanks for coming to my rescue again Saul.”  He stops leaning on the island and walks to me as he gently says, “You’re welcome baby girl, anytime.”  He pulls me in for a hug and I wrap my arms around him, seeking comfort.  He voice is gentle and soft as he tells me, “You’re going to be alright, I promise.”  I whisper back, “I hope so, I feel so broken.”  He squeezes me tighter as he says, “You’re not broken baby girl; just a little banged up.  You’ll get through this; Norman and I will be here for you.”  I sigh and step out of his hug, “This is a huge mess.” 

I pick up my coffee cup and walk back to the living room; putting my cigarette butt into the ashtray on the table.  I sit down and stare out the windows as Saul comes back into the living room; sitting back down in the chair across from me.  I glance at him and he asks, “What’s going through your head Jenna?”  I shrug, “I don’t know.”  He hesitates but asks, “Norman said you told him that you couldn’t do this anymore.  That you give up.  What did you mean?”  I sigh, “I keep dragging him into my drama.  It’s not fair to him.  He sure as hell didn’t sign on for this.”  Saul leans back in the chair, “So what are you going to do?  Break up with him?  Wreck a perfectly good relationship because your ex is a cock sucker?”  I stare at Saul; my heart aching.  I feel the tears welling up again as I quietly mumble, “I don’t want anything to happen to him.  Next time Andrew could go after him.”  Saul looks at me; his expression one of caring, “Jen I know you want to protect Norman but breaking his heart isn’t the way.  I don’t think Andrew will be seeing the outside of a prison for a long time baby girl.  Besides don’t you think you’d be miserable without Norman?”  I look at him for a few moments before softly answering, “Breaking up with him would be the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but if Andrew does something to him because of me; it will slowly kill me.  I couldn’t live with that guilt.”  I take a deep breath and admit, “I don’t know what to do.  My mind is all over the place; my thoughts are so scattered.”