Cat Fight In The Kitchen-Wattpad Rant

Hospital Scenes

Alright pretty people, it's time for another rant and since I just put in 41 hours at work (and only worked three days). I'm exhausted. So naturally, it's Story Time! Yay (because telling you stories and pretending that they make sense is easier than crafting an intelligent, valid argument).

So let's talk about something I'm seeing more and more of: Hospital Scenes

Okay, I'll admit, it adds a bit of drama. But I'm kind of tired of the over exaggeration. I read a story where a girl literally went to the emergency room because she was coughing and she thought she was coming down with a cold.

I don't know...I'm pretty sure it's just my upbringing, but I didn't go to the doctor for shit when I was growing up. I ripped muscles out of my chest, couldn't breathe, and didn't see a doctor for two weeks. I could be dying and my dad would just be like "Oh sweat it out."

I sweated out a lot of colds, flus, allergies, everything.

But anyway, I'm tired of people just throwing these overly dramatic hospital scenes into a work just to perhaps "spice it up". Emergency Rooms are for just that: E-M-E-R-G-E-N-C-I-E-S. Don't send your character to the emergency room because she slipped and had a bruise on her leg. No. Just. Don't do that.

You know what I'm dying to see? An emergency room scene that's there for comic relief. Because do you know how awkward emergency room visits are when you aren't absolutely 100% dying? Anyone?

Well, when your prognosis isn't technically potentially fatal (I'm talking rib cage collapsed with a concussion and a bone poking through your leg), they don't put you on a gurney and rush you down the hall screaming about vitals.

In fact, where I live, if you aren't within moments of dying, odds are you'll have to wait a couple of hours before you even see a nurse, let alone a doctor. Now, this makes sense, because I came from an area with an unnaturally high number of hypochondriacs that were in the emergency room every couple of weeks. So obviously the doctors knew who was serious and who wasn't, but regardless it's whoever is the worst goes first.

Which brings me to my story (because I've found that you guys respond well to my self-deprecating sense of humor). I'll recap the big points at the end, so you can skip the story if you want. I'll set it off with asterisk, because I'm nice!

***

A couple of months ago  I went to the emergency room (okay, it wasn't emergency, it was urgent care, but work with me. Saying emergency room fits with the theme of the rant). I just knew that my head hurt so bad I literally could not stand it. Honestly, worst pain ever. And I was incredibly dehydrated and just...ick. So, naturally, my best friend took me on our lovely adventure.

Honestly, I'm a little fuzzy on some of the details. I remember it started when I was just lying in bed, in the fetal position, holding my head saying I was okay and my best friend kept saying "If you're not okay, just say you're not okay."

And for some reason it all seemed really loud so I started crying (except not really, because I was super dehydrated and couldn't cry) asking him why he was yelling at me. (You know how sometimes pregnant women go all batshit crazy and their hormones get all out of whack? Yeah, that was me, just without the pregnant part).

So I admitted I wasn't fine and we went to the hospital.

Unfortunately, when I got there they gave me this questionnaire thing to answer about my health conditions, which I couldn't see straight enough to fill out myself so my best friend took the task upon himself...only he didn't know all the answers.

Let me tell you guys something, you can be best friends with someone for your entire life and you never really know them until you have to fill out hospital questionnaires together.