A discontented groan fell from your lips as soon as you passed over the threshold of your house. Every muscle in your body currently ached after that lengthy plane ride home from your work trip to California. The golden state was beautiful, but you couldn't exactly enjoy the views while stuck in a temporary cubicle.
On the last day the company orchestrated a barbecue at the beach, but you couldn't find joy in the scenery without your girlfriend there. Instead you traipsed around in her hoodie, and sporadically picked fruit from the tables. The team played games, but you just mindlessly watched waves cascading against the shore.
While watching the sun set behind the horizon that night you saw a vision of Natasha laid out on a blanket in her cherry red bikini. She lazily smirked up at you when she caught you staring, and for the first time since you left her back in New York you genuinely smiled.
Your duffle naturally slipped from your body, you instinctively rolled your shoulders, and cringed at the crackling. When it finally hit the ground it was as if a metaphorical weight was lifted off your shoulders with the physical.
The only things on your mind currently were how you desperately needed a hot shower, and how being in your lovers strong arms could heal the rest of your jilted soul. Proof found as with every step you took you felt your mood lighten, catching whiffs of Natasha's cologne making you hopeful that she was home too.
Hope is often futile though, and that happiness you felt moments ago melded into despair as the closer you got to your room suggestive noises could be heard through the walls. You took a deep breath, heart hopeful that she was having some alone time, but as you pushed the door open you were met with a damning scene.
Natasha, the absolute love of your life, was straddling a mystery man, and her soft pants only gave way to her being guilty in your mind. Your entire world was crumbling fast, your labored breathing alerted your lover to your presence, and she turned to you in horror.
It was clear to her you couldn't see him, which was unfortunate because had you been able to you might've saved yourself a bit of heartbreak. Because just beyond Natasha's back that was turned to you laid an unconscious bearded man with a knife pressed against his jugular.
Natasha hadn't been the most forthcoming when the two of you'd started dating, and you were seemingly oblivious to her status as a former KGB assassin turned superhero. It's not that she never planned to tell you all about her sorted past, because of course she did, it was just for a short time she enjoyed being just Natasha Romanoff, cuddle extraordinaire, the big spoon to your little; your Tasha boo bear.
You completely melted her beyond recognition.
With you around it was as if the crippling weight on her shoulders merely vanished. Neither of you had found that in another before, so this cataclysmic moment would be ultra devastating if it was leading to ruin.
Everything with you was picture perfect, you were a kind, beautiful, down to earth young soul, and she loved the balance you brought to her otherwise chaotic life. Two years in and she'd still yet to tell you her public identity, and in this exact moment she was regretting that.
"Y/N! Wait!" Natasha was desperate, and quite frankly she hadn't the time for a fight right now, not with the Hydra man she's knocked unconscious still out cold in your shared bed. The same one that you unfortunately found her straddling. "It's not what it looks like detka."
"Yeah, I know," you scoffed bitterly while shoving whatever you could into your duffel bag, "It never fucking is with you cheaters."
"I'm not cheating," her tone was one of clear devastation, as if she had a right to that when you had just walked in on her in bed with another. "Please, just give me a chance to explain," she pleaded while following you around the room, she tried to grab you but you quickly shook her off with a violent body jerk.
Then you turned around with an accusing glare that terrified her, "This was never real, was it?" Natasha stumbled slightly at your words, you had every right in this moment to say such a thing but it hurt her nonetheless to see you believe that. "No! It was—it is real!"
You tried to maintain a steely composure, not wanting her to know just how hurt you were, but you could hardly keep it all in the longer you stood before her, you felt exposed, and her heart completely shattered when she heard your harsh, misconstrued conclusion come through a shaky voice. "I was just a warm body for those cold winter nights..."
"No, it wasn't like that, I would never do..." Natasha heard a grunt from your room, she looked back in annoyance before her gaze returned to you as the door abruptly opened, all of her windows were closing in on her here. "Just wait at Lena's, please detka, I'll explain."
You were about to negate her request as you turned to face her, but you could see a clear desperation in her eyes that didn't exactly fit the cheaters narrative. There was obvious guilt, but you could tell it somehow went deeper, so you offered her a nod before promptly leaving.
As soon as you disappeared the reformed assassins genuinely broken expression faded into one of purely terrifying stoicism, she warned her sister of your arrival, then she returned to your room with a devilish smirk. This man was going to wish he was never born for ever trying to come after you, she'd see to it.
—
Once you arrived to the blonde's it didn't shock you much to see her waiting on the stairs of her farmhouse with a bottle of vodka, and a smirk.
"I heard my sister is an idiot," Yelena took a massive swig just before tipping it in your direction. You threw it back and grimaced, body trembling slightly at the bitter taste, "Yeah, she's an even bigger one than you."
"Ha-ha, so funny Y/N Y/L/N," Yelena mocked, her finger joining her as she flipped you off.
"Point me to the guest room or I'll leave and you can face your sisters wrath instead."
Yelena rolled her eyes exaggeratedly, but did exactly as you said as she escorted you there. Then as soon as the door shut your steeled façade crumbled and you fell asleep in tears.
—
Natasha raced to her sister's house within an hour of when you'd left in a rush. She handled the Hydra agent with ease, then ensured you'd never be on their roster again by putting a bullet straight through their leaders forehead.
Nothing had ever meant more to the redhead than you, so to think using you as a bartering chip would result in anything less than their blood shed left the redhead truly confused. They had to know she was just the perfect amount of unhinged to ensure your safety.
So once Natasha got to her sisters land she burst through her doors appearing frantic. "Sestra, chill down." Yelena gestured down the hall with her gun before putting it down. "She's beauty resting, trust me, she really needs it."
Natasha frowned as she realized just how tired you probably are, you'd only just returned from a week long business trip when you stumbled into your house to find her in that horribly compromising position. With a quiet step she made her way to you, stopping by the side of the bed so she could just admire you sleeping in case this would be her final time doing so.
"I love you Y/N," Natasha whispered the words that were tattooed on her fragile heart, and for a blissful moment she pretended like it was all alright as you remained motionless in the bed, but then you were glaring up at her, and she was reminded of the situation.
"Why do people only say that to me when they've wronged me?" You blinked away the grogginess as you moved to sit up and face the woman, putting a heartbreaking bit of distance neither of you were familiar with between your bodies as you shuffled into the headboard, and she remained on the edge.
"Am I not deserving of the guiltless love?" You smiled with a bitter sense of longing, hands flailing about as if that somehow strengthened your sentiments. "Like the ones I see in fairytales, where they get swept away smiling," you frowned now as a tear suddenly cascaded down your cheek, "and not where I curl up to weep in my bed for another damn night."
A beat of tense silence fell over you two as the redhead tried not to cry. Saying I love you (aloud) to you for the first time was meant to be a joyous thing, but she somehow mussed it all up and was left to say it in the hopes that it would be enough to stop you from leaving her. This whole situation was all her fault, so to make it all about her heartache now would only be selfish, and so with all her might she kept her composure as she candidly admitted her truth, "I'm not exactly who I said I was Y/N."
You scoffed humorlessly, "That's for sure."
"No, please, I know you're mad," she began to trip over her words, and for some reason this truly concerned you, because for as long as you'd known her Natasha had always been an eloquent speaker, even in the most stressful of times she got the job done. "Just please, let me explain, it'll make sense if you only listen."
"Okay," you breathed, "Make it make sense."
Natasha nodded and swallowed thickly, then she set her shaking hands under her thighs to lessen their distracting movements, normally you'd hold them, but she couldn't ask you to, not yet at least. With much struggle she lifted her gaze up from her lap to look into your eyes. It momentarily took her breath away, seeing that you were already trying to forgive her, she felt undeserving of your never ending love.
She decided to start slow. "I'm an Avenger."
You chuckled humorlessly, "Yeah, I know that."
Natasha looked to you rather dumbfounded, "You know?" You nodded, "How could I not?"
"Th-then you know about my past?" Your nod was more hesitant this time, telling her you didn't know much beyond her current title, so, in a moment of bravery she divulged to you what she fears would be enough to send you running, "I have many vindictive enemies..."
Your lips pursed, you thought her words over for the briefest of seconds before the lightbulb went off and you chuckled, "Thank God! That guy was so ugly I worried I might be as well."
"Detka what?" Natasha shook her head, she was experiencing emotional whiplash here.
"You're saying that guy in our bed was some sort of rogue agent right?" Natasha nodded frantically, then took the initiative to scoot closer to you when your defensive stance fell.
"I-I need to tell you about my past Y/N, it's unfair to have left you in the dark for this long. If you got home before me, I might've lost you, and I can't imagine who I'd become if I did."
Natasha's anxiety halved as soon as you intertwined your hand with hers, "You would have been the person to avenge my death, and then with the help of family you'd move on."
"No!" Natasha's teary eyes held a sternness that her saddened voice currently couldn't, "I'd never move on, you're my everything detka."
"Natty, death comes for us all, you have to promise me you'll at least try." She shook her head, and sighed, "I barely let you into my heart detka, you were a once in a lifetime find, and when that horrid day comes my heart will die with you—there's no after you my love."
You smiled sadly, tightening your hold on her hand, "I feel the same way Nat, when I thought you were cheating my whole heart shattered."
"I'd never cheat Y/N," she fiercely reassured, "It serves no purpose when all I want is you."
"I know that now Natty, I jumped the gun instead of remaining rational. I should've realized it was an enemy of sorts."
"No," she shook her head, "You were tired, and in the end I should've told you far sooner about who I was; I'm not exactly a picturesque hero."
"Hey, don't say that." You frowned as you saw the guilt swimming behind her eyes, you knew it ran far deeper than today's instance, but you didn't like her feeling forced to come forward with her darkest secrets. Everyone had a past, and you couldn't begin to imagine hers. "You're an inspiration to millions baby, me included."
"The people who came after you today..."
"Hey, you don't have to do that Nat, I already refused to read the articles when they released them." You softly kissed the skin of her palm, "I knew what I signed up for with you, I always did, and I understood you weren't ready to share back then, and I still understand now that your past is yours alone to hold onto."
"But what if?"
You shocked her into silence when you kissed her, "We can't live in what if's, only the now."
Natasha smiled insecurely. "For today, okay." She kissed your cheek, then her face softened. "I still need to keep you safe," she reaffirmed, "I want to move you closer to Yelena or Clint."
For a moment you froze as she spoke her thoughts aloud, you wanted to fight her on this, to tell her you'd been fine thus far, but you also knew this was likely the safest bet. "Okay."
"Really?"
You snorted, "I'd rather be your pretty princess in a castle than your ugly unwanted girlfriend."
"Don't ever think such things again detka," she cradled your face in her hands, eyes shining with unshed tears, "Your beauty's abundant, truly you're the most spectacular person I've ever had the fortune of knowing." Natasha genuinely smiled at you while marveling at your aforementioned beauty, "There's nobody else I'd ever love like this."
You moved to straddle her lap in an instant. "Kiss me, please," your words were beyond breathless, eyes growing darker by the second. Natasha slowly leaned forward, leading you to believe she'd give you what you wanted but she brushed passed your lips to rasp into your ear, "Is that all you want baby, is for me to kiss you?" You shook your head, "N-no, I also want you to fuck me senseless, but a kiss sounded far more romantic."
Natasha chuckled, "You're adorable detka, but more importantly, your wish is my command."
The redhead disposed of both of your clothing in record time, articles of all sorts were now strewn all over the room without much care. Her lips fleetingly pressed to yours before they traveled all over your body, leaving your nerves to almost overcompensate and for your skin to feel as if it was permanently set on fire.
"I need you daddy, please..."
"Shh, daddy's going to take care of you detka," Natasha's fingers slid through your sensitive folds, she pinched your clit and marveled in the way your body convulsed due to the sensation.
"So responsive," she mused as you gasped at the intrusion of her finger, your hips began to buck out of time with her lackadaisical thrusts. "Stay still, or I'll have you warming daddy's cock all night long." Your mind was decently fuzzy, but you still weren't dumb enough to fall for such scams so you stilled.
"That's a good girl." Natasha beamed, her lips kissed yours again as her pace picked up, it was a heady sort of make out as you were no sooner reduced to a panting mess the longer her fingers worked your dripping cunt over.
Normally she'd tease you, keep you teetering on the edge for hours until you just couldn't handle it anymore, but you were clearly tired, and she was eager to see you come undone, and beyond grateful for your forgiveness so she didn't tease. With every few thrusts she curled her fingers, dragging her calloused tips down your velvet walls as she slowly pulled out, to then have you cry out as she slammed back in.
"Daddy please," your back arched and you clung to her biceps with a bruising grip. Natasha leaned down to peck your lips, "It's gonna be okay detka, you're being so good."
Her teeth nibbled at your jaw and you mewled, your pornographic noises spurred her on and she began to kiss down your body in quick succession, a bite left here and there to make your throat sore as your moans kept going.
"Let go for me kotenok," Natasha rasped against the sensitive skin over your pelvis, a shiver ran down your spine as anticipation seeped into your every bone. "Make a mess of my face," she commanded, soft lips wrapping around your clit as she sucked rather harshly.
"Oh fuck!" Your body jerked off the bed as the coil in your abdomen suddenly unraveled. Natasha swirled her tongue around your bundle as she unlatched her lips, then she slid down your slit on a mission before replacing her nimble fingers with her hot tongue.
Natasha continued to fuck you into another mind numbing high, her slicked fingers slid into your mouth to soothe you with your essence as she greedily drank it from the source, you were pleasantly addicting.
When your quivering legs came to an abrupt stop, and your mewling died off she pulled away with a harsh inhale and drooping eyes. If you were awake you'd probably cum again just at the sight of her, with her reddened cheeks from the voluntary oxygen deprivation and with your slick dripping from her chin onto the swell of her breasts. Natasha did, she rutted into your thigh a few times desperately while staring at your peaceful face, and in less than a minute she relieved the last of her tension.
The redhead made her way back up your body once she came down, she kissed your lips tenderly, "Everything I do is for you—my beloved." She smiled in pure adoration at your fucked out state as she pulled away from you, your swollen lips prettily parted, with your spent body slumped into the firm mattress.
Your soft snores slowly filled the space, and Natasha relished hearing them, she never thought such a fear could exist, but it did. Your lover couldn't help but to finally let hot tears run down her cheeks as everything sunk in.
You just looked so beautiful, you always did, but this time you were somehow more so.
You were still hers, and her heart couldn't be more fulfilled knowing that. That you weren't afraid of her demons, no, you were only here to love her in spite of them, and with you by her side the future for once looked bright for her.
Natasha slid out of the room in a robe she found in the bathroom, she planned to collect snacks for when you inevitably awaken hungry, and as she entered the unfamiliar kitchen her eyes fell to the note on the fridge, and she finally remembered exactly where she was.
"I WENT TO KATE'S—Burn the entire room!"
——
3,296 Words
🩵 Kaitlyn 😏