POV: Skylar
I was shaken awake by Aphrodite.
"Oh, shoot, sorry." I quickly sat up.
"Which apartment is it?" she asks.
"Building 6, down that way," I point.
It's dark out now. She pulls around to my apartment building and parks the car in the guest parking spots. She stretches and yawns before unlocking the car for me.
"Come in, it's late. Just stay the night and leave in the morning." I say.
"Fine," she sighs.
"Thanks for driving me."
"For someone who claims to want to be independent, you sure do have a lot of rich friends." She teases.
"All coincidence," I say.
"Emm Hmm."
I giggle and get out of the car and grab my bag before leading her to my apartment. I unlock the door and walk in, the cats quickly come up and investigate.
"You're not allergic are you?" I ask.
"No," she assures me.
I sigh in relief.
"I didn't know you had cats." She bends down and scratches the Countess under her chin.
"It's a long and funny story. Long story short, Jade is ridiculous and saved them from a dumpster. I've had them since high school. Jade is too busy for them, so they stay with me. That's The Countess, Jade's spoiled brat. And this guy is Cloud, my handsome prince." I bend down and scratch behind his ear.
He purrs.
I walk to my room and set my bag down and feed them. I was only gone for a couple of days, but me and the maintenance man have a deal that when I leave out of town he'll come in and check on my cats. So these precious babies are never without food.
"Nice place," Aphrodite looks around.
"It came pre-furnished. I went through my school to get it. My scholarship is paying for it. Jade and I have a house together, but I couldn't stay there alone. Too painful. So I got myself an apartment this past semester. Jade was pissed I did it, but I like it better. I never needed much. That big house makes me feel alone. Jade still pays on it, and I have to check on it every week just to make sure no one has broken in or anything."
"You are stubborn," she comments.
"So I've heard." I go to the hall closet and pull out some spare blankets and set up on the couch.
She eyes me with her judgmental auburn eyes.
"Relax," I roll my eyes. "You can have the bed. I'll take the couch."
"What a gentleman," she comments.
I smirk. Definitely not the first time I've heard that. I pride myself on being considerate to my guest.
"Hungry? I can cook or order something if you want." I go to my room to make sure my bed is presentable, luckily, I made the bed before I left this weekend.
"Can you even cook?" she raises an eyebrow.
"Why are you so snarky all the time," I complain.
"I am not."
"Are too, it's your tone. It irks me." I shake my head.
"I can't help the way my voice sounds." She frowns.
I sigh and sit on my bed, pulling out a food delivery app. She sits next to me, close, so close our thighs touch. I say nothing and just hand her my phone.
"So I take that as a no, you can't cook."
"Hey, I make a mean ramen noodle," I say.
She makes a face. I giggle.
Cloud jumps up on the bed and sniffs Aphrodite, rubbing against her.
"Hey, chill out. She's just a friend." I pull him into my arms.
"Your cats are your wingmen?" she teases.
"Hey, you'd be surprised how effective they are." I pet him as he rubs against me.
"Oh yeah? How many times have they gotten you lucky?" she says without looking up at me.
I feel my face flush, "None, but that doesn't mean there wasn't opportunity. I just wasn't interested. I'm a married woman."
"No you're not, You're not even wearing your engagement ring." She points out.
I feel a heavy ball settle in my stomach.
I only take it off in front of Jade to hurt her. Truth is, I never take it off, ever. It brings me comfort. It makes me feel like Jade is wrapping me in her arms, even when she's not here.
Cloud can sense my mood shift and meows to get my attention, rubbing against my hand to force me to pet him. I force a smile for him and scratch behind his ear.
"You okay?" Aphrodite turns to me, noticing my sudden quietness.
"Yeah," I force out before getting up and getting the ring out of my bag, rolling it between my fingers.
The diamonds sparkle up at me, twinkling like a dream fading from reality. I slip it back on my finger, a little divot on my finger where its permanent imprint sits on my skin. So that even when I'm not wearing it, it's like I am. A phantom ring is always on my finger.
"Do you like sushi?" she asks.
"Huh?" I turn to her, forcing my tears back.
Geez, these days I'm pretty useless. If Aphrodite wasn't here I'm pretty sure I'd already be a crying mess, swaddled up in blankets in the dark, like usual.
"Sushi?" she eyes me.
"Oh, yeah, that's fine." I nervously fix my hair, trying to hide my real mood.
Her eyes move to the ring on my finger before she looks back at the phone.
"We can watch a movie or something," I turn the tv in my room on.
"Okay," she sets the phone down. "I ordered us food."
"How much was it?" I dare ask.
"Relax, I paid. I remember you are penny-pinching."
I blush in shame and look down.
"Why are you acting like this?" she asks.
"Huh?" I play dumb.
"Your mood changed, you're... acting off now."
"Oh, sorry." I stare at the ground.
She moves on the bed and comes up behind me, wrapping her arms around me. my heart skips a beat in fear and I jolt out of her embrace.
"What are you doing?" I ask.
"I thought you could use some comfort, excuse me," she says, offended by my rejection.
"Sorry, don't... don't do that. It's been a while since anyone held me. My body, my mind, starts to get the wrong idea. I am weak." I admit.
"You really that afraid to slip up?" she asks, serious.
"I know, pretty pathetic right?" my eyes water.
She sighs and rubs my shoulder to comfort me.
"I'm just so lonely these days. So very lonely. More than anything I just want someone to hold me, wrap their arms around me, and never let go. But I'm so pathetic, I can't... there is this block in my head that prevents me from getting close to anyone because I still want Jade. Which is just driving me crazy! Because I'm so torn! Part of me wants her to break it off with me, rip it off like a band-aid. The other part of me is still helplessly in love with her and too afraid to even breathe in another girl's direction for fear that I'll catch feelings and break Jade's heart. What is wrong with me!?" I cover my face to hide my tears.
She pulls me into her embrace, immediately my heart starts to race. I feel pathetic for it. I'm so desperate for physical touch and assurance that even someone like Aphrodite makes my heart race. I feel so sick with myself.
"You want to preach at me for not letting myself move on, look in the mirror Skylar. The only one holding you back from being happy is you."
I know she's right, but I am stuck. I don't know what to do. I love Jade, I love her so freaking much that it's hard to even breathe when she's not near me. But I am only human. I have needs, wants, and cravings. Many of which Jade does not satisfy. How can she when she's never here?
When did I become one of those girls who throw away a relationship because of lack of physical contact? When did it become so important to me? Maybe it's always been important and I just never noticed until she was gone and not here to fill those needs. Maybe I've just degraded as a person without her.
Aphrodite pulls me down onto the bed with her, holding me in her arms as the tv plays in the background, neither of us paying it any attention. I let her hold me, nuzzling my head into the crook of her neck.
"Why are you being nice to me? I know you hate me." I finally say.
"I don't hate you, I never hated you. I was very jealous of you at one point but I never hated you. You just annoy me is all. But even someone as annoying as you doesn't need to be suffering like this. Besides, our situations aren't so different. When you think about it. Strangely enough, it brings me comfort to know I'm not the only one stuck in limbo."
"I don't know why I let her control me so much, but if I could stop this pain inside of me, I would," I say.
"Love is grip stronger than any chain. If it were so easy to shake, there wouldn't be so much suffering in the world."
"How philosophical," I comment.
She runs her fingers through my short hair. I melt deeper into her arms. For a moment we are quiet, locked in this strange interaction. Never in a million years would I have guessed comfort would come in the form of Aphrodite. I've never been her biggest fan but seeing her like this, this softer side of her, makes me realize that my bias toward her has tainted my image of her for years. Maybe she's right, maybe I never forgave her for what she did to me.
"Thank you, for this. I'm sorry I'm such a mess." I say.
"It's okay, I'm kind of a mess too. I'm just better at hiding it."
I wrap my arms around her and pull her as close as possible. Due to my head resting near her chest, I can hear her heart rate pick up. It makes mine pick up too, a ticklish feeling traveling down my spine. I feel guilty for feeling it.
There is this awkward moment that passes between us, both of us feeling things we shouldn't be feeling for each other. Finally, I sit up and pull away from her, she scoots away from me too. We look away from each other, avoiding meeting the other's gaze.
I flinch when the doorbell rings with our food.
"I got it," she quickly gets up to get it.
I straighten myself out when she's gone, fixing my hair and pulling down my shirt which was rising in the back.
Then I join her in my tiny dining area. The table is only big enough for two. Perfect for us. I turn the tv on in the living room, which is clearly visible from the table, and turn the one in my room off.
She lays out all the sushi on the table so we can just share everything. Then she moves her chair closer to me and we turn to the tv as I put on the first movie I see.
"Emm," she hums in delight as she grabs a piece and shoves it in her mouth.
I open my chopsticks and struggle to grab one for myself. It keeps falling. I glare at it and try to use two hands with my chopsticks to grab it.
Aphrodite giggles at me and I feel my face turn red in embarrassment.
"Here," she picks it up with her chopsticks and holds it in front of my mouth.
I take it.
"Emm," I hum in delight.
She moves closer to me and continues to feed me as we watch the movie. Though I don't admit it out loud, it makes me feel better. Comforts me and warms my heart. After dinner, we sit on the couch and I rest my head on her shoulder as we watch the movie. The cats sit around us, the Countess keeps her distance and stays just out of reach. Cloud sits on my lap and purrs when I pet him occasionally. Aphrodite pets him too.
When the movie is over Aphrodite yawns and I show her to my bathroom so she can wash up. I wait until she is done to wash up and get ready for bed myself.
"Night," I grab a pillow from the bed as she makes herself comfortable.
She grabs me by the wrist and prevents me from walking out, I turn to her.
"You can stay in here with me if you want." She offers.
I blush and look away from her.
She stands up and grabs me by the waist, pulling me closer, letting me know I didn't misunderstand her intentions.
"We shouldn't," I whisper.
"It doesn't have to mean anything. It's just been a while since I've felt comfortable enough with someone to take a chance. I'm ashamed to say I'm very out of practice. I don't like it when it's with people I have no connection with. I have always found the deeper the connection, the better it can be."
"But, won't it be awkward, you... and me. Us. We aren't exactly cool with each other like that. Until today, I kind of didn't like you that much." I admit.
"And now?" she asks.
I finally meet her eyes.
The orange and brown hues sparkle up at me, reminding me of something I can't put my finger on.
"Now," I say softly, pulling her closer by wrapping my arms around her. "Now I see things differently. I see you differently. I think I've finally forgiven you for all that crap way back when. I really appreciate what you've done for me today."
"Can't we just be weak together, for this one night?" she asks.
I pull back and she looks away in disappointment until she sees me take off my engagement ring and put it away on my nightstand. Then we lock eyes again, the room instantly charged.
She leans into me first, her lips brushing against mine.
"Promise we won't tell anyone about this," I say.
"I swear, trust me. You aren't the only one who doesn't want this getting out." She whispers.
"I like to lead," I peck her on the lips.
"Me too." She smirks against my lips.
"Then it seems like we have a predicament." I giggle.
"Don't try and fight me for it, I'll win." She grabs me by my shirt and whirls me around before slamming down on the bed and getting on top of me.
"We'll see," I say before she smashes her lips against mine.
It's been so long since I've felt this way. Actually excited, and happy. When I do it with Jade, I'm just doing it out of obligation and desperation for her affection. It's the only time I feel connected to her like we used to.
This isn't like that; this reminds me of how good it used to be between Jade and me. How far we've fallen from what it should feel like. How easy it should come, how comforting it should be.
Aphrodite and I wrestle for control, our clothes flinging this way and that in the room. She says she's out of practice, but the girl has moves. She easily dominates me, not that I try too hard to fight her. It's been a while since I was on the receiving end of this much tender love and care.
The bed rocks back and forth with her lovemaking motions, and I'd be lying if I said this didn't feel really good. So good I struggle to remember what it feels like when I do it with Jade. My breath comes out in short pants as I curve my body into her, enjoying every last second of this.
"Fuck, Skylar." She moans.
I wrap my arms around her, my hands resting on her back as I pull her closer. She takes the hint and smashes our lips together again, our tongues fighting for dominance. I moan and twitch when she hits that sweet spot.
She breaks the kiss and whispers in my ear,
"You like that huh?"
She does it again.
I twitch and moan again.
"Does it feel good?" she asks.
"Yes," I say breathily.
"Yes what?" she asks.
"Yes, fuck yes," I moan as she does it again.
She stops.
I look up at her.
"Beg me," she demands.
I blush so bad I can feel my neck heat up too.
She thrust her hips again for emphasis and I twitch in pleasure.
"I'm waiting," she says.
"That's embarrassing," I complain.
She smirks.
"I can't," I whine.
"Then I guess you don't want it." She pulls back.
"No!"
She stops, looking at me expectantly.
"Aphrodite, please," I force out. Averting my gaze.
She moves back inside me, slower.
I moan.
"More," she demands.
"Aphrodite, please. Oh fuck, please. Don't stop."
She goes faster.
"Aphrodite, oh god, Don't stop." My body tenses up.
She bends down and kisses me, picking up the pace, hitting me in that sweet spot.
I moan and dig my fingers into her back as my body reaches its climax. She slows to a stop as I struggle to catch my breath.
She peppers kisses on my glistening skin, allowing me to come down slowly. Then she pulls back, pulling the strap off. She crawls back on top of me and we resume our make-out session. I turn it around on her, flipping our positions and getting on top of her to repay her efforts.
Even on the bottom she's still controlling and demanding, her hands forcing my head down low.
After we complete the devil's dance we lay naked in bed, staring at the ceiling, taking in what just happened.
"Thank you, for this." I pull her into my arms.
"Still think I'm a mean bitch?"
"Oh most definitely, but you have a sweet and soft side too. Which for the record, I think is very cute." I kiss her shoulder.
She blushes and elbows me.
I giggle.
She lets me hold her and we fall asleep like that.