Hetalia x Reader Oneshots.

2p!Denmark + Infant!Reader

Mikkel had a small apartment all by himself on the more crime ridden side of town. Why someone decided that he lived in the perfect place to raise a child was beyond him.

He'd just been watching television and smoking a cigarette (further evidence why no one should've given him a child) when he heard a knock on the door. He was used to his roommates from college just popping by at the most random times, so he didn't use the peephole before he opened the door.

He didn't see anyone, so he just assumed that someone was pranking him, but when he went to close the door, he heard a small cry and looked down to see a small child in a basket lying in front of the door.

"What the hell?" he mumbled to himself as he picked up the small child. What is this, a fucking fairy tale? He found a small note on the side of the basket. I can't afford to take care of her, so she's your problem now. Have fun.

"The fuck?" He shut his door and set the child down on the couch next to him before rubbing his eyes. There was no way he could raise a child on his own, let alone in this shitty part of town, so... loathe as he was to think about it, he was going to have to visit his old roommates in the morning to get some help.

He went off to his room, but he heard crying almost immediately. He walked back into the room and saw the child in the basket reaching out for him, so he picked up the basket and set it down at the foot of his bed before turning off the light and rolling over to go to sleep.

----

In the morning, when Mikkel woke up, he rolled over and almost crushed the child, who had crawled out of its basket and curled up next to his back. "Christ kid, don't scare me like that." He put it back in the basket and set it on the nightstand before getting changed microwaving himself a frozen breakfast sandwich.

He was about to just leave the house, but considered that the little kid might get hungry too. He didn't have any baby food, but he did know that baby food was a mixture of mashed up foods, so he grabbed a banana, and mixed it up with a bottle of apple juice he had in his fridge.

The baby happily ate it up, and Mikkel somehow got it to burp before putting it into its basket, covering it with a blanket, and locking his apartment before making his way to the house.

As soon as he got there, Thurston slammed the door open and almost ran into him. "Oh, it's you. The hell are you doing here?"

"I need to talk to Loki."

"Well, I'm sure he'll be happy to see you." He stalked off, and Mikkel let himself into the house before sitting down on the couch in the living room.

"Hey, it was just a joke, calm- Mikkel? What brings you here?" Loki grinned and ran over to hug his "friend" with a laugh. "I haven't seen you in ages. Is that a gift for me?"

"Sorry no." He pulled the blanket off of it and watched as Loki's eyes widened in surprise. "Someone left this at my door last night and I have no fucking clue what to do with it."

"Okay, first of all, don't curse, children are impressionable young things," Loki said as he picked up the baby. "Second, don't call it an it. It's either a he, a she, or a they. It is for things."

"Well I don't know if the kid's a boy or a girl, and a baby is too young to pick a gender."

"Well, you stay here for a while and keep an eye on the small thing, I'm going to go buy some food and diapers for you, and then we can call child protective services."

"Why don't we just call them now?"

"Well, we want you to be prepared in case you end up taking custody of the tiny little kid."

"I am quite possibly the worst person to raise a child."

"You came out functional, I'm sure your child will too."

"Just go get the stuff."

"Alright." Loki held the baby up to his face. "Would you like to come with me, or do you want to stay here with daddy?"

"Don't call me that."

The baby looked over at the sound of his voice, then began reaching out for him.

"Aww, that's precious." Loki handed the baby back to Mikkel before running out of the door. Mikkel looked down at the baby in his hands and watched as the baby reached up to pet his face with their tiny hands. He'd never been particularly fond of his stubble (it being more a result of laziness rather than conscious choice) but the baby seemed to love it.

----

After a few hours, a diaper change they fumbled through, and finding a children's programming channel that had been on for... some reason that Loki wouldn't tell him, they finally got around to calling child protective services. Mikkel talked to the lady on the other end, scheduling a time for the child (whose gender they had finally sorted out) and giving his information in case they needed to contact him.

"And do you have plans to take custody of the child?"

Before he could answer, Mikkel felt a small tug on he pants. He looked down to see the child, who he and Loki had started call (Y/n) staring up at him with (e/c) eyes. "Uh, yeah, if there are no complications, I'll take custody of the child."

And that is the story of how Mikkel Køhler moved into a large house with four other men so he could take care of a child named (Y/n), who, despite his fears, grew up to be kind and successful.