Red Strings of Fate (Haunted Series 2)

Strings 39: Cruel Fate

"What happened? Are you okay?" Tiningnan niya ang oras sa relo na suot at nakakunot ang noo sa akin. "It's seven in the morning. May klase ka mamaya. What are you doing here, Hope?"

Alas nuwebe ang klase ko, pero klase ang huling nasa isip ko ngayon.

"A—" Ano ba ang sasabihin ko? Ano ba ang pakay ko sa pagpunta dito?

Jamie snapping sense into me made me want to apologize. Gusto kong magalit, pero gusto ko rin siyang yakapin, halikan... and selfishly beg him to forgive me.

I ask breathlessly, "Do you really love me?"

He was caught off guard by my question but he answered quickly. "Forever until I die."

I can't wrap my head around it. "Why?"

Pinili ng aking mga magulang na iwan ako.

Pinili nila ang isa't isa at iniwan ako sa mga taong hindi nila alam kung tatratuhin ba akong tama o mali.

Alam kong ginawa nila 'yun para sa akin at hindi na ako galit sa kanila. I hate myself more because I worry so much that I assume they did it because there is something about me that is so incredibly unlovable. Pakiramdam ko nasa isang mahabang misyon ako para alamin 'yun, at hindi ko alam kung paano ko aayusin ang sarili.

He holds my gaze turning serious. "I don't know. I just do. Every single part of me loves you, needs you. I can't sleep, eat, and think properly if you're not near me and know you're safe... I had to work out today to stop myself from seeing you so early. You make me hope—make me dream of planning a future with you other than plotting revenge."

Totoo ba 'tong sinasabi niya?

TJ made me want to believe that loving me without a reason is possible... but. There's always a "but."

Our strings go way back and it's painted with blood red.

"I'm sorry TJ." Nanginginig ang boses ko. Hindi ko deserve ang pagmamahal niya. "I'm so sorry."

He groans. "No. Don't treat my love as something you apologize for—"

"Hindi. Hindi 'yun ang tinutukoy ko... Alam ko ang ginawa ni pa—ni Sir Ayahiko sa inyo." Nanginginig ang labi ko at hindi ko hinayaan ang sarili na iwasan ang kanyang tingin. Deserve ko mapagbuntungan ng galit niya. "I'm sorry."

Umigting lang ang kanyang panga at wala nang sinabi.

Did he hate me? He must have despised my existence seeing me every day. "Sasabihin mo ba sa'kin?"

"It's not that important."

"That's bullshit Teej." Iminuwestra ko ang katawan niya na puno ng pasa. "Ito? Sasabihin mo ba sa'kin na nangyari 'to?"

"It doesn't concern you."

"It doesn't concern me? I was the reason kung bakit ka naparusahan."

Parang bumalik kaming dalawa sa kung saan kami nagsimula. When I wasn't sure whether he was mine or not, if I could touch him without repercussions, and if I had the right to warrant an answer from him.

Inabot niya ang braso ko. "It was my decision. It's my fault. You don't have to worry. I've dealt with it."

"You make me feel useless, James." Inalis ko ang mga kamay niya at humarap sa pintuan ng balcony. "Dapat hindi na ako pumunta."

"Just fucking wait." Sumunod siya sa akin, inihagis ang sariling katawan sa harapan ko para takpan ang pinto. "Tell me what's happening."

"Aalis na ako. You should rest TJ."