You don't know me

Chapter 54

Good Morning! Thank you for 29k. It's amazing uff.
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Magnus POV

Alec sat down with Melodie and played with her. He seemed to be doing a good job. It warmed my heart to see that and made me think. What would have happened if I was still with Alec? Would we have children in the future?

I did not know what to think about this situation. Alec may have a child. Maybe it's not his but what if? How should I handle this? I should not care about it at all, because we are not a couple anymore but somehow I did care. After all, I still love him.

"Is everything alright?" Alec asked, breaking my mind. I blinked at him in confusion, then hesitantly nodded. How long have I been staring at him now? "Are you sure?" he asked again.

"Uh yes, what do you want to do today?" I asked to distract. He shrugged his shoulders.

"I don't know, I thought you might know better." he said. Funny, I never had siblings or anything.

"How about the park?" I asked and he nodded, smiling. Well, then we have a plan for this day.

"I still have to look for jobs." he said. I sighed and sat down next to the two.

"Alec, I can just borrow the money and you'll give it back to me someday. You do not have to look for a job for a kid where we do not even know if it's yours." I explained. He just shook his head.

"I couldn't give you the money back so soon, if even at all." he said. Slowly, I put my hand on his thigh. Immediately I felt this tingling in my hand. I have not touched him for so long. He looked at his thigh and then at me. I sighed.

"Don't worry, okay? First we'll find out what's up with Kate, and if it really is your kid, we can still get you a job." I explained.

"We?" asked he. I nodded, smiling.

"I told you that I help you." I said. He smiled and nodded. We looked at each other for a long time. There was that sparkle in his eyes again. At some point, I averted my eyes and took my hand away. No, I can not let him get that close. I looked at the clock, it was now 12 o'clock.

"Let's go then." I said and he nodded. We got up and took Melodie by the hand. I took my key and locked the house. Together we went to the park, which was not far away from me. We did not talk the whole way. It was an uncomfortable mood between us. I really wanted to prevent that. I had to get it back somehow.

When we arrived, Melodie wanted to go directly to the swing. We put her in this baby swing and Alec pushed her. Melodie laughed the whole time, she seemed to like it a lot. I watched the two smirking.

"Let's say you're looking for a job, which one would you take?" I asked to lighten the mood a bit. He looked over at me, but still pushing her so she would not lose momentum.

"When I was away, I worked as a waiter, well, at first I just washed the plates off." he said with a smile. I also smirked. It seemed like he had a good life there too, why did he come back?

"Was that fun?" I asked and he nodded.

"Absolutely. Of course, I did not earn much, but enough for a small apartment. " he replied proudly. He had an apartment? Here he has only one hut.

"Seems like you've had a nice life there." I stated. He shrugged and looked away.

"There was something missing, I don't know, New York will always be my home." he said. I only nodded. "How's your father?" he asked.

"Do not even start with that, he's still the same asshole." I admitted. He was only there twice this year, and we only argued.

"I'm sorry for you." he said. I shook my head. I couldn't need pity.

"Some parents are great, and some can't be." I said and he laughed softly.

"Believe me, I know what you mean." he said. "My mother was upset that Izzy and Jace are meeting with me again." he explained. He looked at me and there was that sparkle again, but it was rather sad. I know how he feels.

Even if parents do everything wrong, which they can only do wrong, you don't hate them. Everyone just wants parental love and they would do a lot to get it. But sometimes that does not help. Sometimes you just aren't good enough.

"Did you think about talking to your parents again?" I asked and he immediately shook his head.

"No, there's nothing I have to tell them, if they want to talk, they can, but I will not do that." he said, looking down. I know what happened between him and his parents since he told me when we were in a relationship. But only now do I realize how much it puts a strain on him.

I always had someone to talk to if I had problems with my dad, he did not. I always talked to Cat. Oh shit. Cat. I have to cancel the cinema. But what do I tell her? Alec has a daughter and I have to take care of her? No, probably not. I quickly pulled my phone out of my pocket and dialed her number.

"Hey Mags, what's up?" she greeted me.

"Cat, um, I'm sorry, but I can not come with you. I'm busy." I explained. Actually that was true.

"Ehh okay, we'll catch up, oke?" she asked. I breathed in relief. Luckily, she does not ask more closely.

"Sure, see you." I said and hung up.

"I'm sorry if I've crossed your plans, you're welcome to go too, I can manage that somehow." Alec said and I shook my head.

"No, that's okay." I said and he nodded, smiling.

We spent the whole afternoon together in the playground. In between we went to eat something. It was a really nice day. Me and Alec were as open as good friends. I missed that. I miss him. Late in the evening we arrived back at my home. I took off my jacket and my shoes. Alec stood watching me.

"I think we'll go again, thanks for helping me." he said. I looked at the clock. It was half past nine.

"You can sleep here, too. I mean, it's not really safe to walk around the city with Melodie at night, I have two rooms off." I meant. He shook his head.

"No, Magnus, I do not want to burden you." he said.

"I'll help you the rest of the week anyway, so you're welcome to stay here, there's more room here anyway." I explained. Finally he gave in and agreed.

We put Melo to bed. We decided that Alec sleeps with Melo in my bed and me in my dad's. When I finally dropped into bed, I sighed. Spending so much time with Alec confuses me. I don't know what to feel.