Mixed Signals.

90.

The flight to New York but was good, it was lonely and upsetting because I missed my family but now I was here it was so good. I had a taxi from the airport to my hotel. I got to the hotel an was so excited. I dropped my bags and flung on my bed. Dialling Jay's number straight away.

"You okay Babes?" He laughed down the phone.

"Jay it's lovely here! My hotel bed and room is just amazing." I burst into laughter.

"I'm glad you're happy."

"Yeah.. how are the children?"

"Really good actually. They've had pancakes an milkshakes. Harvey's asleep on the sofa and Florence has gone for a walk."

"Okay good. How are you?" I sighed.

"I'm alright. Looking forward to hearing about you're adventures." He laughed. "Anyway I'm gonna go. So I love you and see you later."

"Yeah love you too. See you later."

**

After getting unpacked and changed into something more comfortable I headed outside and took in my surroundings. It was beautiful. So many buildings and cars and people everywhere. I spun around and it was the most beautiful thing I'd seen. I began walking to the bakery I'd been told about. Apparently they sold the most beautiful bagels.

When I got there the food was perfect. I ordered a bagel with Nutella and whipped cream. Strawberries and Nutella on the side. I took a photo of me with them and posted it on my social media because I was still in a state of shock with how amazing New York was.

**

I got the kids settled and Florence was having a nap upstairs because she said she wasn't feeling well. I sat with Harvey while he ate lunch and I showed him a photo of Erin with a bagel and some strawberries.

"Look at Mummy. Isn't she beautiful." I smiled.

"She's got a smile." Harvey laughed.

"She has." I smiled putting my phone down before watching him. Just to think we'd made him. He was from myself and Erin. He was so perfect and so was Florence. She was perfect so now it was worrying because it was now down to me to care for them.

**

4 weeks after Erin left for New York.

The kids had been playing up so badly. It was unreal the amount of mouth I was getting off of Florence. It was horrendous. She was clearly missing her mum now.

"Daddy?" Harvey called from the top of the stairs.

"What's up?" I shouted getting stressed from the kitchen.

"Daddy? Quick. It's FloFlo." He called.

"Leave her if she's being stroppy."

"Her lips are blue.. FloFlo?" I could hear him trying to talk to her. I went upstairs with them and into Florence's room, she was laying on the floor seizing up but he was right her lips were blue and her eyes were rolling back. I tried hiding her from him because it was upsetting to see. I managed to call an ambulance and get her breathing properly again. Harvey was freaked out but feeling a bit better. I stayed with both the kids until the ambulance arrived.

**

I took a sip of my hot chocolate and put it down on my desk. I was wearing some joggers and a hoodie and typing away on my case studies. My phone started ringing but I had no clue where it was. I used my tablet to answer the call.

"Hello?" I sighed.

"Hey Erin? Are you free?" Jay's voice came through my speakers as a tearful echo.

"Woah Jay what's wrong? Are you okay?" I smiled changing to a video call. "Wait, are you in the hospital?"

"Yes. Florence collapsed earlier to just to be safe I bought her in. I had to call an ambulance."

"Is she okay? What caused it? Where is she now?"

"Erin relax, she's okay, she's in resus, she's not awake or talking but she's on a drip and apparently she should be okay in a few hours."

"Do you want me to get the next flight back?"

"No of course not. If it makes you feel better we will stay on a video call so you can keep updated." He smiled.

"Yeah I'm just worried.." I sighed wiping a tear away.

"That's okay. She's okay. We are all okay. Harvey's asleep in the bed alongside Florence right now right in front of me so it's all good. So how are you?" He laughed.

"I'm okay. I'm tired, really tired."

"Not been sleeping?"

"I've been working." I smiled.

"No for gods sake Erin. The point of you going away was to relax and get a grip." He sniggered.

"I've got a grip thank you very." I laughed. Just as we were talking a nurse came in and spoke to Jay about something. "Jay what's wrong?"

"They are keeping Florence on a ventilator and waiting for resuscitation, they don't want to take her off of the heart machine because they are concerned her heart is too weak." He sighed.

"Oh Jesus Christ Jay.." I began to cry.

"No Erin don't worry. Please just stay on the phone to me, keep talking, we will stay on the phone and get through this together." He smiled through the screen.

We stayed on the phone together for the whole night and when I did wake up in the morning Jay was awake and holding Harvey on his lap and they were both eating a bowl of cereal.

"Morning." He smiled.

"Morning. How is she?" I sighed.

"MUMMY!!" Harvey smiled.

"Hey little man." I smiled blowing him a kiss.

"Yeah she's okay. Still not awake but honestly I think she's just resting. What about you? How are you?" He smiled.

"I'm good. I slept alright last night. How are you?" I smiled.

"Yeah I know, you slept a solid 2 hours, otherwise you were pretty restless. I'm okay, I didn't sleep but I'm glad we're still talking. It's nice to speak to you." He laughed.

"Yeah I know. It's lovely to see you're face. I miss you guys."

"How much longer do you reckon you're going to stay there for?" He yawned.

"About 12 weeks I reckon." I smiled.

"No earlier?"

"I mean I can if you want me? Like if you want some help with Florence I can come home." I smiled.

"Do you want to come home? Literally if you don't want to then it's fine." He laughed.

"Okay darling. Well I'll stay here but if you need me for Florence give me a shout." I smiled. He nodded and began reading through the newspaper.

**

I watched her as she was typing away, she was still sat in bed, she had a tank top on and the quilt over her legs and she was on her laptop. There was a lot of sunlight coming through the windows. Her hair was a curly mess around her head.

"You look beautiful right now." I smiled.

"Huh? What?" She laughed.

"I said you looked beautiful." I laughed.

"Oh thank you. I've literally been up like 20 minutes." She smiled, she tucked hair behind her ear and rubbed her eyes. She yawned and sat up slightly.

"Get yourself a cup of coffee and some bagels and then you will feel better." I smiled. She nodded and took the table downstairs with her while she made breakfast. "Your hotel rooms has 2 floors?"

"Oh yeah. You've not seen anything yet. It's beautiful." She laughed. I watched her go and do her own thing and it made me feel good. She was just perfect in everyway. Like she was just so happy even though we were having a tough time.