Mixed Signals.

67.

16 weeks.

When you love someone you are meant to be there all the time and support them. When you marry someone you promise them you will care for them in sickness and health. I'd been doing that for Jay since I met him. He had been trying but this pregnancy was clearly a issue for him because he could hardly even talk to me. I don't think it was anything I'd done or said because I'd been so ill with morning sickness apart from going to work every now and then I'd hardly done anything. Normally got up, threw up for a few hours, took Florence to school, threw up a bit more, did some decorating, made food, picked up Jay and then it was normal night time routine.

**

Oh my. Keeping a secret from Erin was the toughest thing yet. She thought I was being moody but actually I was avoiding conversation because I didn't want to let it slip out.

"Make sure you are ready by 11 tomorrow morning? I'll pick you up and we can go out?" I smiled.

"Sure. I'll see you in the morning?" She smiled.

"Yeah. Goodnight sweetheart." I kissed her gently before leaving and heading to work. As I pulled off the driveway I saw her close the front door and shut the living room curtains. I did feel a bit bad but I didn't even have work. I was going to meet the lads at the hotel. When I pulled up there they were already stood outside by Antonio's car.

"Hey." I smiled parking up and going over.

"Your here!" Hank laughed looking at his watch.

"I am indeed. Is everything sorted for tomorrow morning?"

"Yep. We've got the suite booked. We're ready to go up there and have a 2nd sort of stag do?" Adam smiled.

"Let's go." I laughed.

**

I'd had enough of being accused of doing stuff or not doing stuff. I'd had enough, I'd done so much to try and be the best wife I could be. I did as much as I could to ensure I was the best mum to our children but nothing ever seemed to work. I ran myself a bath and sat got in it beginning to just cry. I wore a baggy top in the bat just incase Florence come in or if she needed me. I bought my knees up to my bump and held myself there crying. I heard a knock on the bathroom door and then Gabby came running in.

"Oh sweetheart. What's going on?" She smiled as she knelt down next to me. She didn't care I was soaking wet, crying or cold. She too her jacket off and got in the bath with me and held me there.

**

We'd only been at the hotel for 3 hours and we were so drunk. It had been good so far though. I mean I didn't feel drunk but I could tell I had been drinking. But who even cared we were having the time of our life. I was excited about tomorrow morning. I could hear my phone ringing but I had no idea where it was. After 20 minutes of it constantly ringing me I found it.

"Hello." I laughed.

"Jay. What on earth is going on. Where are you? Because I can hear loud music and lots of shouting." Burgess sighed.

"Well I'm with the lads preparing for tomorrow. How are you?"

"Not good Jay. Not good at all and neither will you be when you hear this."

"What's going on? I thought your with the girls having a party for tomorrow." I kept laughing. I took sips from my can of beer.

"Yeah we're all sat at Erin's in the bedroom and on the stairs waiting for Gabby to get Erin out the bath and calm her down because we've arrived to find your wife heartbroken in the bath still in clothes crying her eyes out because she's worried she's upset you. I think something needs to be doe or said because she's heartbroken Jay." She sighed before hanging up. Nothing she'd said went through my brain and I carried on drinking and went back into the lads and we carried on with the party together.

**

I held Erin in my arms still. Her head against my shoulder as she cried. She was hyperventilating against me and there was literally nothing I could. I was sat in the bath with Erin, Kim, Stella and the couple other girls we were friends with were all sat on the bathroom floor next to us holding Erin's hand or rubbing her back. This was the level of teamwork and support we had. We'd been here for 2 hours so far and she was no better. You could just tell that Erin had been holding all of this in for weeks, even months possibly. This pregnancy had been taking it's toll on her. I wasn't even sure what to do because I'd never experienced anything like this before. Seeing her like this was heart-breaking for me. Erin had no idea what was going on tomorrow morning so I wasn't sure what to say to her. We had come round to have some drinks and a small party for Erin as Jay had the surprise planned for her. Like she was meant to be having a hen party with us while Jay had his stag with the lads. But instead we are sat in Erin's bathroom calming her down, trying to sort her out but we don't even know what to say or do to help her out. We're just being as supportive as possible.

"I'm so sorry." She whispered.

"It's okay darling.." I smiled.

She did eventually manage to get out the bath, we got her dressed and then we stayed in the bedroom as we bought up loads of food and drink and we all chilled together in Erin's bedroom and discussed everything.

"I never thought pregnancy could be this tough. I'm not even halfway through." She sighed laying back holding onto Jay's pillow.

"What caused you the upset?" I smiled.

"I don't feel good enough for Jay. I don't think he wants to be with me anymore."

"Well how about Erin. You wait until tomorrow. Go out with him tomorrow for a bit. Then discuss it all tomorrow night. You can sort stuff out in the evening." I smiled.

"Sounds good for me." She smiled. I left everyone with Erin and I headed to Jay's hotel room. I knew he needed a good talking to and if he wasn't going to listen to anyone it would be me.

"Gabby!!" He smiled.

"No Jay. Shut the fuck up and listen to me." I slapped him quite hard but it sobered him up enough to listen to me.

"What's going on?" He sighed.

"We've just spent hours sorting your wife out because she doesn't feel she's good enough for you. I'm telling you know mate. You better ensure you properly sort tomorrow out. You need to show her she is important to you because this pregnancy and the constant fall out's with you are really putting emotional and mental stress on her. So please? Please Jay make sure tomorrow goes to plan?" I sighed.

"I promise I will..." He smiled.