Mixed Signals.

79.

"Jay?" Her soft voice broke me out of my day dream and I stood up.

"Oh thank god you're home." I smiled pulling her into my chest and holding her in a tight embrace.

"Yeah sorry I crashed out and didn't have enough money to get home, I stayed with some of my old friends from high school in a hotel." She laughed warmly. Just seeing her big blue eyes lit me up. She was smiling and it made me so happy.

"That's okay sweetheart. I'm glad you had a good time and I'm even happier you're home now." I kissed her gently and she had this melting smile on her face.

**

I went upstairs and into see the kids. Florence was awake and playing with toys in her room. I smiled and she ran up to me and hugged me.

"Hello lovely. My little gem. Shall we cook pancakes for breakfast?" I smiled.

"Yes please mummy." She laughed. She got dressed and went downstairs and I went into the nursery and Harvey was awake and rolling around. I picked him up and gave him a proper little cuddle. I kissed his head and put him in a cloth and tied it to my chest so he was resting against my chest. I went back into Florence's room and made the bed. I finally made it downstairs and when I got there Jay was already making pancakes with Florence and they were laughing and giggling away. I smiled and sat at the counter opposite them with Harvey in the cloth against me still. I got a cup of tea and ate a banana because I felt so knackered after last night. If it hadn't of been for Adam I probably wouldn't of made it home. I needed to spend today with my family so we could sort stuff out. I still loved Jay. Of course I did but something needed to be done because things weren't working well at all.

***

Things were finally going back to normal. Harvey was healthy and strong and 6 months old now. Florence was studying for exams and focusing on school work. Erin was back at work and doing well. Me? I finished everything with Abby, I went for therapy, Erin had counselling with me to help and we managed to get back on track. So well in fact that in 6 days time we were going on a holiday to Greece together for a week while Hank had the children. I was so excited to get away just us two and Erin was looking forward to it but she was also quite worried because she hasn't left Harvey for longer than 10 hours since he's been born. It was understandable why she was worried but at the same time I think going away and relaxing and being able to chill out would help her a lot. She'd been through a lot especially this year. I mean hopefully going away now would help her and then we had some nice time to spend as a family and then we had thanksgiving and Christmas to prepare for and then birthdays and then our anniversary. Everything seemed so perfect and great.

**

Training and going back to work was the best thing I'd ever done. I was happy to be back surrounded by the people I loved. I think it was what I needed to get back on track. When I was pregnant with Harvey I think I worked so bloody hard I made myself ill. I made myself so exhausted by trying to work it caused me a lot of pain that meant I had constant appointments with the hospital for scans and check ups to make sure Harvey was okay and then when I went into labour that day it broke my heart because I blamed myself but now I'd gotten over that. I'd taken the time off work I needed to get my head straight and get Harvey awake and better and now we were all okay and things were normal. We were dropping the kids off, working for hours and then sharing the dinner and cleaning duties which was lovely because we were a proper functioning family now.

*
I got myself dressed and went downstairs to find Jay cooking breakfast with Florence and he had Harvey in a wrap against his chest.

"Morning mummy." Jay smiled waving Harvey's hand at me.