Voltron One Shots

Dat Ass

Summary: Dumb college AU. Lance isn't gay but then Keith's ass happens and um he might be a little gay for Keith's ass.

A/N: If you squint you can see the plotline in between miles of dumb dialogue I swear. It's 50% Lance being a dumbass and 50% him realizing he's in love with Keith's ass. Someday I'll learn how to write a consistent story.

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"I don't want to go to this class" I whined. I was dragging my feet as we approached the class room. This class was the reason for 95% of my current stress. It was awful. "It's so boring. I can never pay attention to the professor" Let me just say this, I'm straight. I've never thought otherwise, and no one else has either. That's why Pidge's absurd response caught me so off guard.

"You can't pay attention cause you're so in love with Keith" I nearly stumbled into the wall at her words.

"E- Excuse me?" I stuttered. She snorted.

"You're in love with Keith" she repeated. Keith. She thought I was in love with Keith. The dumb guy with a mullet that I only sat next to in class because everyone else was so unbelievably boring that I had trouble staying awake even listening to them talk.

"N- no! I am not!" I said defensively. "I like girls" I pointed out. It's not that I had anything against gay people. I would be totally cool if I or any of my friends were gay. But I wasn't. I was not. "How could you possibly think I'm in love with Keith? We've literally never hung out outside of class. And I'm not even gay!"

"Someone's getting defensive" Pidge mumbled to Hunk. Hunk turned his head to hide his obvious smile. We were standing outside the class room now, but we still had a few minutes before class started.

"I am not defensive!" I exclaimed loudly. People turned to look at me. I glared at them and lowered my voice. "You guys know me. I like girls. I love girls. Every part of them. Look at that girl. Stunning" I pointed to a pretty girl standing a few feet away from us. She looked at me and blushed, and then hurriedly walked away. "And what about her? I don't like objectifying women but look at her butt! It's incredible. A work of art. A masterpiece" I gestured at the beautiful girl standing down the hall. Goddamn she was beautiful. Look at that figure, those hips, and her butt... words couldn't even describe it. "Fuck she's actually really pretty. Those jeans look amazing on her" Hunk coughed to try and cover his laugh. Pidge didn't even try to hide it. She burst out laughing and was practically in tears by the time Hunk had regained his composure enough to look me in the eyes.

"Lance... that's Keith" he said seriously. I laughed sharply.

"Ha-ha very funny" I said, rolling my eyes. Did he really think I was going to believe him? There was no way that was Keith. I knew what he looked like. There was no way Keith's ass looked that good in jeans. Besides it was clearly a girl with her hair up.

"Dude..." Pidge was still laughing hysterically.

"Shut up. I'm not stupid. I know that's not-" The beautiful girl turned around. The beautiful girl was actually a beautiful guy. And it was Keith.

Fuck.

He was really beautiful when he had his hair up. And why had I never noticed his ass before. Why was I noticing his ass now?

Fuck.

Maybe Pidge was right.

He was walking towards me. I looked around wildly for an escape. I was blushing furiously as Keith walked towards out group. Keith greeted us and then smiled at me. Pidge snorted and turned away from the three of us, choking back her laughter.