Love or Fame?

Chapter 64

Bow Wow: & what's your name?

?: *smiles* Logan

She's...pregnant? Is this true? No...she can't be. I tried my best to stay calm, & it was killing me. I wanted to just break down right there. But, I kept it all in. No tears shown. I won't give her that satisfaction.

Me: um...how long have you known?

Logan: I just found out yesterday. I tried to tell him but then I saw him with some other girl & things got messy.

"Messy. Just like you" I thought to myself. Now I gotta give this bitch advice about this? Really?

Me: well...just tell him.

Logan: well he's actually watching right now. So I kinda just told him. He loves 106 so I know he's watching.

Me:...mhm

BW: well, that's all for today! Lexi, you know it's always a pleasure seeing you. You look beautiful like always *hugs me* stay you.

Me: always *smiles* thank you. It's always a pleasure seeing you too. It's always a pleasure being on 106! Y'all are family!

BW: you already know!

We all said our goodbyes to the audience at home and in the building. Then, we headed backstage.

Ang: bye Lexi *hugs me* Miley's been asking for you btw

Me: OMG I have to go visit her real soon. I missed everybody.

Ang: well, it was great seeing you again. I gotta go to this photo shoot. I'd love if you would model some of my stuff!

Me: definitely! Just tell me when and where & *sings* I'll be there.

Ang: *laughs* great!

We said our goodbyes and Diggy and I stepped out.

*Home*

*Diggy's P.O.V*

Logan's pregnant? Is she telling the truth? Is it mine? Damn, I have so much on my mind right now. Just when everything's going great with me and Lexi, this happens. I hurt her once before we got together, when we got together, and I can tell she was hurting now. She hasn't said a word to me the whole ride back to her house. She hasn't even looked at me. All I keep wondering now is...now what? Where do we go from here? How do I keep her in my life? As soon as she opened the door, she went straight to her room. I really messed up this time...again...what's new right?

After changing, she came back down and went to the kitchen. Once again, she didn't even look at me. It was like I was see through to her. I know how she is when she's upset so I didn't know if I should talk to her now, or wait till she calms down a little. I decided to just build up some courage and I followed her to the kitchen.

She was leaning against the island with a glass of water in her hand just staring at the floor. It was like she just...zoned out.

Me: babe?

She didn't look up. She didn't say a word.

Me: babe, I know your mad right now but we gotta talk about this

She still didn't say anything.

Me: Lexi

No answer.

Me: Lexi, please say something

Lexi:...what the hell do you want me to say? *finally looks up*

Me:...where do we go from here?

Lexi: well Diggy, I'm gonna go to bed & you? You can go home cuz I have nothing to say to you. I don't even wanna see you right now.

Me: I know I messed up that night I slept with her and you have every right to be upset for that. But why are you pushing me away now? We were just so happy. We can work on this. We can keep moving forward baby. Please, don't push me away. I just got you back. I don't wanna lose you again.

Lexi: the word "again" shouldn't be at the end of that sentence Diggy. You shouldn't have lost me in the first place! You should've kept your ass upstairs with me that night but no! You had to go sleep with some other girl right?! You never loved me did you?

Me: of course I loved you. I loved you from the beginning and I still live you now. I'll always love you Lexi.

Lexi: & you wanna ask why I'm pushing you away. Diggy you didn't respect me enough to NOT sleep with her and you didn't respect me enough to even use a damn condom! It's like you wanted this to happen! Wtf did you think would happen if you didn't use protection Diggy?!

Me:...I wasn't thinking

She was crying. Once again, because of me. It was silent for a minute. Then she finally spoke.

Lexi: I can't keep doing this to myself. I'm always crying because of you. Do you realize that? You're always hurting me. Is this fun for you?

Me: *furrows eyebrows & shakes head* no

Lexi: so why do you keep doing it? Is it me? Do you think there's something wrong with me? Are you with me because you felt sorry for me? I wanted to be with you but you were worried about the fans. Then all of a sudden, you wanted to be with me. Was it because you felt sorry?

Me: no baby that's not it at all. I love you with all my heart and-

Lexi: stop lying to me

Me: I'm not Lexi. I do love you.

Lexi: so why do you keep doing this?

Me:...I don't know. I'm sorry. I just-

Lexi: I can't keep doing this Diggy. I'm done...we're done

My head shot up when she said that. I refuse to lose her again. I got on my knees (like Usher in Confessions Part 2 did when he said "she opened up the door & didn't wanna come near me")

Me: what?! No! We can't be! Babe, we just got back together. I'm not losing you again. We can work this out.

She went silent again.

Me: say something

Lexi: *sigh* lock the door on your way out *walks away*

Me: *holds on to her wrist* babe, I know your mad at me for sleeping with her, but we moved passed that and I never did anything to hurt you again. This is just something from the past tryna stop us from moving forward. Don't let that happen, please. We've been through too much to just give up on us.

Lexi: Diggy, please-

Me: don't do this, Lexi. Please.

We were both crying.

Me: I love you so much. I'm sorry baby. I'm so sorry. I never wanted to hurt you! I just...I don't know why I keep hurting you. I promised you that I wouldn't do it again. Please don't let this be it for us. It's not like I did it again. That doesn't make any of this okay, I know. I just...I don't know what to say right now. I want you & I need you in my life. I can't lose you again! Please...

What should she do? I'll try to post another one tonight b/c idk if I'll be posting tomorrow. But leave feedback. :) The theme song of this should be Confessions Part 2 right? Yeah. So that's the song for this chapter lol. Deuces!