One sick love story

Overload

I managed to hold it back all night, but I don't know how much longer I can hold it in for. At my hospital appointment last night, the doctors were very disappointed to find out that I went to school yesterday. After hearing about my little incident in the girls bathroom, they have strictly told me that I can't go back.
They've made the decision for me...
I'm quitting college.
But that doesn't mean I will never go back. It's like I'm... Taking a break. That's all.
But it's not over yet. I'm going back in today to talk to the head teacher about it. And I'm going to one more lesson of biology to explain to my teacher why I ran out on his class yesterday.
I still haven't told ben, and I don't know when I'm going to. I'm worried about his reaction, but even if he tries to stop me, I'm still leaving. Health comes over boyfriends.
At least that's what Bella told me after our chat last night.
It's great to have a friend like her, so every time I go to the hospital I have something to look forward to.
Unfortunately, we got on to the concept of Sadie. She's not doing so good, so I'm going to visit her the next chance I get.
But my biggest priority is getting to school and explain what's going on.

I arrive just outside of the school, and ben is waiting for me again.
"Hey, so you decided to come back?"
"For today"
"Darcy don't do this."
"Just let me do what I want to do. I've made a decision and no one is going to change my mind."
"Can I try to change your-"
"No. Ben. Let's just go inside and get on with the day."
We walk in with a small distance between us, not looking each other in the eyes, like we have never even met.
We walk down the corridor and towards the assembly hall, but I trail off to the left where the headteachers office is. Ben doesn't even question my disappearance. He just Let's me go.

As I'm walking passed the students no one even looks at me, or acknowledges me. It's almost like nothing even happened yesterday.
I decided to wear a brown wig today, so that hopefully no one would recognise me after what happened yesterday.
So far... It's working.

I finally make it to his office and gently tap my shaky knuckles on his door.
"Yes, please come in." He points towards a large seat in front of him and I nervously sit down. "So, Darcy is it?"
"Yes"
"You came to talk to me about an incident that happened yesterday right?"
"We'll sort of."
"Explain!"
He sits there with his hands linked together and his eyes are firmly locked  with mine. But I keep my head facing the ground as I speak.
"Well... There's something going on that I probably should have told you, but didn't. See, yesterday I got called a lot of nicknames because my hair was wet. And this was because-"
I explain the whole incident that happened in the girls toilets to him.
"So why were you throwing up? Is there an explanation? Or was it just because you were nervous because it's the first day of collage."
"No. I have a condition, that causes me to be very ill."
"And what's this condition? Is it something that we should be concerned about?"
"Yes. And I really regret not telling you before.  I have something called acute lymphocytic leukaemia." He sits, staring at me blankly. "And if you don't know what that is... It's a form of cancer. Yes, I have Cancer."
It takes him a while to reply. I understand it's hard to reply to a kid who's just told you they have Cancer. So I speak up. "But it's okay. You don't have to be all sympathetic with me. I've had it a little while now, and i think I've received all the sympathy one can get."
"Well...I er... I'm sorry to hear about that."What did I just say? No sympathy. "But... Well I don't really know what to say?"
"All I'm here for, is to tell you that I've been advised by the doctors that I should probably stop with education until I'm fully cured.... Basically, I have to leave college."
"Okay well... I don't see that as a problem. You do whatever you have to do to stay healthy, good luck with the whole... Er.... Cancer... Situation. And I hope to see you again in the near future."
I'm guessing that was a sign to leave.
As soon as I mentioned I had Cancer, he started acting really awkward with me. But so does everyone I guess. Their whole perception of you changes. You go from being an average human being, to the sick kid that everyone feels sorry for. And I'm sick of it. I'm sick of being sick.