Red Strings of Fate (Haunted Series 2)

Strings 45: His side (Part II/II)

She was always the person who physically moved to calm herself down. I noticed it even before—she cleaned, took it out on my car, made clothes—anything physical helped her reduce stress.

"Yes. You can't keep on avoiding me, Hope. If you don't know how to say it to me, hit me."

I want to touch her, I want to feel her skin on me, but her hands would hurt if I didn't wrap them.

"Niloko niyo ako. Para mo akong pinaikot-ikot." Her words cut clean—sharp with betrayal. But she was angry. That alone meant the plan worked. We didn't reconcile, not yet—but anger was something. It was real, raw, and far better than watching her retreat into silence or spiral deeper into her mind. "I need time."

And time and space I did give.

She's entitled to her emotions. That's what I wanted, what I hoped would happen when I pushed her to confront me. To scream. To let it out.

At the same time, I wanted to lay all the information I have on the table for Scarlet. She has been lied to, and all the people beside her have hidden things from her all her life, including me. And I don't want to continue that way when it fucking hurts her. I'll be fucking damned if I'm the person who does it most.

"You showed her your file?"

"I did."

Everything has its consequences. I didn't want to hide disclosing the information because, fairly, I don't care. Besides, rules can be quite overbearing.

Dad—Sir Archie—leaned back in his chair like he was trying to decide what to do with me, if he wanted to strangle me or shoot me. Knowing him, it'd be both. He knows my brother, Sky, would let what I did go, that's why he's the one in front of me now.

"She knows about all your operations? Captain?" He asked, voice low.

I nodded. "She knows what she needs to know."

"And who the hell decided that?"

"I did."

He stood. The calm before the storm was always the worst. He and Sky are alike that way. It's fun pushing their buttons. "We don't operate on what you feel she needs to know. You may be the Captain, but you're not authorized to do that. This isn't some spy drama where you break protocol because love makes it poetic. You're not like this. What happened to you?"

"I trust her," I said simply.

"That's not the point. You're the Captain," He said firmly. Not with pride. With something colder. "That title means you don't get to make emotional decisions. You don't get to choose who sees what. You enforce the rules."

"I told her because she deserved to know," I said. "She's been in the dark long enough."

"By telling her everything?! She's still a Yoshikawa, an Itasaki." He looked at me like I was an alien. He's so bewildered by my action, and with my whole being, I stopped myself from rolling my eyes at my father.

I'm pretty damned sure I'm in love with her. I'm still trying to figure it out. I can't recall precisely when it hit me. This gaping, gnawing fucking hole in my chest feels like it's only full when she's around, when she's happy and well. I can't survive without her, and I'd do anything to take care of the reason I breathe.

I knew as I handed her that file that the logic didn't work in my favor. But the math was simple, she was worth it.

"You're not supposed to feel anything," He stared at me as he said those words. "You're supposed to calculate. We gave you that title because you were cold enough to make the calls no one else could."