Someone To Stay

41

I had decided to take a few days off for my mental health but of course JJ had to be flown out of town so I was just sitting in bed without her. I wiped my tears away and picked up my phone when it buzzed. It was from JJ. I sighed. I didn't to talk to her right now. The past few days I had felt really depressed and violated from the pictures that were sent and I just didn't know what to do about it. I was so tired. I didn't know how much longer I could keep fighting. I heard my phone ring from a call, I saw that it was JJ and I just let it ring. My stomach grumbled and I rolled my eyes. My phone kept ringing for what seemed like hours and then stopped.

I thought that I finally had some peace and quiet but my phone rang again. I saw that it was JJ and that I had 32 missed calls from her and 47 texts. I read the most recent ones.

My JJ <3: Cam answer the phone

My JJ <3: I swear to God if you're dead I will literally kill you

My JJ <3: Please just let me know you're ok

My JJ <3: I'm coming back tonight I'll be home in a few hours

My JJ <3: Camden I am not fucking joking pick up the phone right now

My JJ <3: Please answer I'm worried about you

My JJ <3: Please be ok

My JJ <3: This isn't funny

Cam :) <3: Im fine

I shut off my phone and thought that that would be the end of it, but my phone buzzed immediately after.

My JJ <3: I know you aren't

My JJ <3: What happened?

I left her on read, holding my face in my hands. I felt so disgusting right now. Like I had no energy left and no motivation to do anything.

My JJ <3: I'm almost home

I lied down in the bed and curled up underneath the covers, not wanting to talk to anyone.

A few minutes later she walked through the door and sat down next to me on the bed. "Why the hell weren't you answering your phone?" She sounded angry.

"I didn't want to." She pulled the covers down off of me and saw that I was just staring at the wall.

"Ok..." She trailed off and looked around the room. "What did you do while I was gone? Except ignore me?"

"Nothing."

"So all you did was ignore me?" I shrugged and she let out a frustrated sigh. "That feels really nice." She got up off the bed and I turned away from her, feeling an uncomfortable tightness in my chest. "Are you going to tell me what's going on or are you going to make me guess?"

"Can you please hold me?" I whispered.

"What? Camden, no you don't answer me for over 24 hours and just expect me to hug you and that'll make everything ok?" I blinked away my tears and sniffed.

"I'm sorry." I curled up into a ball and she sat back down on the bed. "Can you just...can you please hold me?" Without hesitation this time she lied down next to me and put her arms around me, pulling me close to her. I let out a sob and I felt her tense up.

"Baby look at me." I shook my head and she kissed my shoulder. "Are you ok?" I didn't answer and I felt her heart rate pick up. "Cam...please talk to me." I didn't talk I just turned around in her arms and buried my head in her chest, holding onto her for dear life. "What's wrong beautiful?"

"I don't wanna talk JJ." She nodded and kissed the top of my head, rubbing my back.

"Talking will help." I shook my head.

"I don't...I can't." She nodded again and held me protectively. "I'm sorry for not answering...I just knew that you'd ask me to talk and I didn't want to."

"Ok, that's ok. Just don't do that again. I was really worried about you." I nodded and sniffed. "It's ok. You can get some sleep now."

I drifted off to sleep in 10 minutes.