Beautiful things - jaylor story (peace book 4)

exploring bodies and therapy

-auroras pov- 

We get to the therapist's office, and according to mom this is the therapist Ellie goes to. I don't want to go here; I don't want to talk to anyone because I just feel like I can't. No one seems to understand that I just can't talk about it, I don't want to, and I just can't. Not to mention that I don't even think I need therapy, I'm fine but no one is listening to me. 

'I'm going in alone because everyone else decided that it would probably be best, so I sit down on her couch and stare around the room. It's way too many toys in her and silly characters on the walls. "so I'm anna, and I'm a psychologist" she tells me, and I introduce myself too. 

"so I heard that something happened to you. But first I would like to hear a bit about you" she says, and I shrug and tell her what I like to do when I'm at home, what skills I like to do in the gym and what subjects are fun or hard at school. She asks me about my relationship with my siblings, but I don't want to be here, and I don't aren't to talk to this lady. 

"I know it's probably hard to talk about, but do you want to talk about what happened? With your coach" she asks, and I shake my head "I don't want to be here at all. I told everyone that, but no one is listening to me. I don't need therapy and I don't want to talk to you." I say honestly and cross my arms. I want to go home; I don't want to be here. 

"it's probably weird to talk to a stranger about something so personal, but your parents thinks that it's a good idea. Why don't you try it? I can't tell anything of what you're saying to them unless you're either a danger to yourself or to others. Otherwise, I'm bound by confidentiality so you can tell me anything" she explains but I really don't care. 

She clearly senses that I'm not interested so she brings out a drawing of a body and I furrow my eyebrows "could you maybe point to where he touched you. So you don't need to talk about it" she suggests, and I roll my eyes. "What part about not wanting to talk don't you get. I'm not going to point and I'm not going to talk about this. I'm going home" I say and stand up before I storm out of the room to go find my parents. They seem confused that I'm out after ten minutes and I can hear the stupid therapist following me. 

"Aurora what's wrong?" my mom asks me, and I cross my arms "I was there for ten minutes, I did what you asked. Now I'm going home. Are you going to drive me or do I need to walk. I'm not speaking to her. I told her about what I like to do, now I'm going home" I say really loudly but there isn't anyone else in the waiting room, but I wouldn't care if there was anyway. I don't want to be here and if I have to, I will walk home. I'm not dealing with this. I talked to that stupid woman yesterday and that was more than enough. Why don't they understand that this isn't something I want to talk about. 

"How about we come in with you and we can talk about this in private" my mom suggests, and I roll my eyes, but I follow them. "I give you five minutes and then I'm walking home if you don't drive me" I say sternly and loudly to them. I'm even refusing to sit down; I'm standing by the door. "Aurora why don't you come sit down and we can talk with your parents" anna suggests and I shake my head. 

"Aurora, anna is really good at her job with talking with kids who have been through hard stuff. And you went through something really hard, and your mom and I think that you should try speaking to her about it. It's important to get your feelings out there so you can handle this" my dad says, and my insides burn with anger. 

"I hate you all. Why won't you listen to me. I don't want to talk about this. I'm not talking about this, and everyone just needs to leave me alone" I say and run out of the room, and I would run out of the building but security is at the entrance so they would never let me run away. Instead, I lock myself in a bathroom and slide down against the wall crying. Why won't anyone listen to me.