The Necromancer King (A Game Of Thrones)

Valentine's Day Special

(Not canon at all, crack/parody chapter... made it for fun.)

Together in some strange cartoonish space, both Rhaegar and Aerion stood beside each other.

"As you know, my son, today is Valentine's day... the celebration of love and affection!" Rhaegar Targaryen announced rather enthusiastically as he held a winter rose in his hand. "So who will you be celebrating it with?"

Aerion glanced to the side, where images of all of his love interests appeared. "Is the opportunity limited to just one?"

"Well... ideally, yes." Rhaegar chuckled. "I find it a little... just a little hypocritical that you don't like the fact that I loved Lyanna over your mother when it's looking like you're going to have well over five wives-"

"... At least I win my wars!" Aerion Targaryen shook his head. "Perhaps if you would have actually beaten the stone-headed Robert Baratheon, I would be less hateful."

"Fair..." Rhaegar nodded, shrugging his shoulders. "Sooo, how's it going with that Jocelyn girl? It seems like you're following in your great father's footsteps with the Stark girl, hahaha."

"It's not like that."

"Stop the capp." Rhaegar Targaryen laughed. "Father, what do you think about Aerion's lustful nature?"

"That's my boy, hahaha!" Aerys, the Mad King, appeared behind Aerion and proudly grabbed his shoulder. "I raised him as my protégé, you see. He is only so great because of my teachings!"

"Right..." Aerion frowned, shrugging his hand to the side. "Grandfather, you stink almost as terrible as Flea Bottom and your nails are as long as daggers... even in this strange space, you don't take care of yourself?"

"Oh... my apologies." Aerys laughed, warping into his 'peak' form, where he was once said to be handsome. "This is a more fitting appearance for Valentine's Day, no? I wonder if Joanna Lannister will look at me again..."

"You ought to care more for mother," Rhaegar replied, shaking his head. "Not Tywin's wife..."

"You're boring." Aerys rolled his eyes, turning to Aerion. "Staying true to a single woman is boring, isn't it? What King... a King of House Targaryen should restrain himself to a single woman? See, we've all done this, at the end of the day! I had my mistresses, Rhaegar had his Lyanna girl and my little protégé here plans to have five wives!"

"I never truly thought about fucking another man's wife or someone promised to them, however..." Aerion exchanged glances with Aerys and Rhaegar. "And I'm not your protégé, grandfather. What did you even teach me?"

"Why, I taught you many things when you were little! Remember when I had your little legs climb up the Iron Throne?"

"... How is that even relevant?"

"From that challenge, you gained incomparable strength and determination! Naturally... the warrior that you would become was all because of me pushing you forwards!"

"Your grandfather is still a little mad, as you can see." Rhaegar rolled his eyes as he whispered to Aerion. "Staying with that nutcase in the afterlife is quite difficult... please, free me when you can"

"What are you whispering about? Whatever, show me the beauties of Aerion's age! I shall inspect them myself, hahaha."

"This is so embarrassing." Aerion sighed, watching as all of the beauties he had known appeared before the trio and stood in a straight line. The first in line was his first wife, Arianne Martell.

"Beautiful... but Dornish. Hmm, a solid six out of ten." Aerys judged.

"A six... out of ten!?" Aerion shook his head in disapproval. "Are you blind, old man?"