Beautiful things - jaylor story (peace book 4)

the kids are getting older

"Ellie, its morning. Time to get up, its school today" my mom says, and I groan and roll over in bed to meet her eyes "morning munchkin, breakfast is ready" she says and kiss my forehead before walking out to probably get my siblings ready. Today is the first day of middle school and I'm not looking forward to it at all. 

I bite my lip and close the door before going into my bathroom and locking the door so no one can come in. 

From the cupboard, all the way in the back I pull out my scale and strip down naked and step on it. Down 200g from yesterday. Sighing I write it down in my notebook and take out my measuring tape to check my stomach and thighs. 

Looking at my naked body in the mirror I feel disgusting. I look so fat, and it makes me sad that I can't be as pretty as mom or the girls in my class. 

Being Taylor swift and joe Alwyn's daugther isn't easy because the world is watching my every move. My mom doesn't know that I look up stuff on the internet on my phone about them and mostly about me. I want to see any picture of me out there because I want to see what people say about me and if they notice I'm working on losing weight. I just want to be skinny so people can like me, I want to be skinny so maybe I won't get bullied anymore. 

I put everything back in its hiding spots and get dressed for school, but I don't go downstairs, I don't want to have breakfast. It will just make it worse. 

"Ellie sweetie, mom has breakfast for you downstairs" my dad says and come into my room with Kenzie beside him and I nod and bite the inside of my cheek. 

I guess there is no way out of this, so I go downstairs to mom smiling and putting down my breakfast she has prepared for me. Immediately I start to calculate the calories and what I need to do to make up for it. It's hard to not get my parents suspicious about what im doing, but I've gotten pretty good at it now. They are clueless and I like it that way. If they knew they would be so disappointed in me, but I'm doing it for everyone around me, I will be more liked and then my parents will be proud of me. 

"Are you ready for school Ellie?" my mom says as she braids my hair as I force myself to eat some of my food. "yeah" I lie. I'm not ready for school, I hate school. 

"i'm sure you're going to have a good day, Ellie. Starting middle school is exiting" she says and kiss the top of my head. If she only knew how bad things are at school. I don't tell them about it, I don't want to be labeled as a snitch, it's bad enough already. 

After I finish about half of my breakfast, I excuse myself from the table and make my way upstirs to my bathroom again and turn on the water. I don't want to do this, it hurts, but it's for the better of everyone, so I open the toilet and let a tear roll down my face. 

-taylors pov- 

Ellie goes upstairs after barely touching her breakfast, she ate maybe half of it. But she doesn't usually like breakfast so getting her to eat at all is a challenge, but I'm getting worried about her. There is something up with her, but I have no idea what it is. It might be something at school, or maybe what happened all those years ago is haunting her again, I don't know, and I hate that. Not knowing what's wrong with your child is the worst feeling, I just wish she would talk to me. We used to be so close, btu she has grown more distant the last year, and especially the last six months. 

After getting aurora and Kenzie's hair done and all their lunchboxes ready Ellie finally comes downstairs again but looks really pale as we get ready to head out the door. "Sweetie are you okay" I say and rub her back "yeah, why wouldn't I be" she says but she always says that, and I know that she is lying at this point. There is something wrong, but she doesn't want to talk to me.