The Dark Of Our Worlds

The Pains of Our Loneliness

A/N - MAJOR Trigger warning for the following: Self Harm, Loneliness, Depression and Panic Attacks. DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE TO ANY OF THESE!!! 

This is being written for one person, you know who you are, delete that fucking chapter. 

A few hours later Alma was sat on her bed, head in her hands, shaking violently. Tears poured down her face as she gasped frantically for breath. She could feel her heart pounding, hear her rasping breaths. Her chest was growing ever tighter, ever more painful. 

The years of constant loneliness, the lack of support and the never ending pressure of her duties was growing too much for Alma, sending her spiralling. It had started with the loneliness, extreme loneliness. She used to pretend there was someone else with her in the loop, they never had a name or a face, but they were there. 

Then the depression started, the daydreaming stopped working, and other habits crept in.

 Alma clawed at her sleeves, they started to rip but she did not care. Once she reached skin, she didn't stop, she kept scratching and scratching. Blood trickled down her arms and wrists, dripped onto her lap and stained her skin. 

Time passed, eventually the bleeding stopped. Not caring that she was still wearing her clothes or makeup, Alma pulled the duvet over her head, and slowly cried herself to sleep.