Don't Save Me

Chapter 39: Don't Get Too Close

Sunlight streamed through the window as I woke up the next morning. I rolled over, noticing my tear-stained pillow. I quickly flipped it over, hiding the evidence that I had been crying. I made my way to the bathroom and splashed cool water on my face before getting dressed. With a wave of my hand my makeup was applied, my puffy eyes were no longer noticeable, and my hair was pulled back out of my face into a high ponytail. I double checked myself in the mirror, making sure no one could see anything was wrong. This was a routine I had gotten quite good at. No one can see you cry, I thought to myself, focusing on holding my emotions in.

I stepped out of my dorm and made my way to the Great Hall for breakfast. The moment I stepped into the Great Hall, the atmosphere felt different. It wasn't as cheerful and I instantly noticed why. James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter were standing near the Slytherin table. I quickly made my way over there and could hear the conversation, the disdain in each of their voices was clear.

"Leave her alone," James hissed. Severus stood up from the table and stood face to face with James.

"You don't know what you're talking about," Severus hissed.

"I know enough to know that you're no good for her," James replied, poking Severus's chest.

"Guys, this isn't helping anything," Remus tried to reason. Several eyes were watching the situation unfold. Even the teachers were cautiously watching in case they needed to step in. I quickly reached the Slytherin table and stood behind Severus.

"What's going on here?" I asked.

"Nothing," James replied. "Right, Severus?"

"Nothing," Severus replied, sharply.

"Remember what I said, Severus," James said, glaring daggers at Severus.

"How about you just shut up?" Severus muttered.

"What did you just say?" James asked, his voice dripping with anger. He grabbed Severus's collar and I heard the scraping of chairs as several teachers stood up, prepared to step in. I quickly stepped between Severus and James, gently grabbing James's wrist and removing it from Severus's collar. James's eyes flicked to mine as his anger threatened to boil over. He wrapped his other hand around mine and his anger slowly dissolved.

"You're not helping your situation right now... If you want my forgiveness, this is not the way to get it," I said, letting go of his hand. "Why can't you just leave him alone?" I could feel the teachers' eyes on me, though none of them intervened. They stood at the head table, waiting, in case they were needed. James sighed before looking down and walking toward the Gryffindor table. Remus smiled at me before he, Sirius, and Peter followed James. I heard the scraping of chairs once more as the teachers returned to their seats. I looked up at the head table and saw Professor Mcgonagall and Professor Dumbledore beaming at me as Professor Dumbledore raised his glass, gesturing to me, before taking a sip. I turned to Severus, trying to control my emotions... trying not to show how angry I was with my friends.

"Are you alright?" I asked.

"I'm fine," he replied, both of us taking a seat.

"What was all that about?"

"Nothing," he replied, no longer looking at me.

"Severus... talk to me. What did they want? What aren't you telling me?" I asked, gently touching his arm. He still wouldn't look at me but, after a moment, he responded.

"Not here... I can't... just... not here. I promise I'll tell you everything later," he replied, finally meeting my eyes as he gave me a soft smile. I nodded and we resumed eating.

...

A few hours later I was sitting in the courtyard during a free period as Severus walked over to me. I closed the book I was reading and he took a seat next to me.

"Ready to tell me what all that was about?" I asked.

"You're not going to like it, but... we don't keep secrets from each other anymore." I nodded, encouraging him to continue. "They think I'm a bad influence on you and told me I should stay away from you. Black seems to have it in his head that I'm trying to date you, so, of course, he is angry. We all know he has a thing for you. Potter is furious, thinking that you could be dating a Slytherin, especially... me. They told me that I am no good for you... not even as a friend. They pretty much told me I need to stay away from you... or else." By the time Severus finished speaking, I was fuming. How dare they threaten him! How dare they try to make decisions about my life!

"Or else... what?"

"They didn't say but I imagine it won't end well... for either of us."

"I don't care what they think. They can go to hell."

"Y/n... I know you miss them."

"That's besides the point!"

"I've already told you... I won't have you losing people because of me. Honestly... they're right, Y/n. I'm... I'm not good for you. It's dangerous for you to be around me."

"Well it's dangerous for you to be around me, too! One slip up and my uncle could kill you! But that doesn't mean I am going to let other people decide who I hang out with! We just have to be careful."

"No... Y/n. I mean... they're right about the company I keep."

"What are you talking about, Severus."

"Nothing, just... don't get too close to the Malfoys... and especially... don't get too close with Bellatrix."

"Severus..." I began, my voice shaking as fear grew within me.

"We can't be friends anymore, Y/n... I'm sorry. You shouldn't have to lose anyone because of me and... it's dangerous for you anyway... I'm sorry." He stood up, kissed the top of my head, and turned away from me, walking across the corridor and disappearing inside the school, leaving me with a million questions and a tear-stained book.