Shit rant poems

The brick wall dilemma

78 hard hits of my head against a brick wall

Yeah

Thats how i feel right now

Im not hurt

I just want to slam my forehead
Seventy eight
Times

Against a hard
Cold
Brittle

Brick wall

And see my blood swirl
Ripple
And drop

Run freely from my face

And probably gums

Because if you dont lose teeth from the experience

Its like

It devalues

The black eyes
Bruised cheeks
Concussion
Fluid on the brain
Broken jaws
Pain the the neck
Loss of consciousness

And etc

But you see

I wish that

And all those things

The symptoms of bitter, bleeding, sweet, metallic tasting victory

The warm tingly fuzzy feeling before you black out

Maybe even permanently

But i want this

Because its currently the best solution

People want to or want others to ram their heads into walls out of frustration

But while i actually do it

And when another kid with the exact same problem

Doesnt solve it

They accept their defeat

By maybe crying

Or talking about it

The physically pain free route

They get to come to the same conclusion that i will

Even though i will have worked

Exponentially harder to get there

They can say
'It was hard but i thought about it and worked thru all the shit in my head'

I get to say it was hard

And i bashed my head into the concrete material that makes up the nearest wall

And i have every injury to prove it

But no substance to base my actions on

Its a

But i

But

I did this

Moment

Its the supermarket pastry beating a french baker

Healthy mindsets vs brick walls and the bird shit that stains them

And its also

My fucking life