Shit rant poems

Her

Maybe it's because she knows
Or thinks she knows
I would never kiss her
I would never touch her
I would never fall irretrievably in love with her
Oops I guess

She knows that I'm gay
She knows that we're friends
She knows she loves her boyfriend
The current one anyway

But I don't know that I can stop myself
Not for forever
I know that I love her
I love and love and love and love her
And she loves me just platonically
Painfully just so fucking painfully so
But I don't know if I love her romantically
Or if it's a special kind of love
Just for her
That I can feel for no one but her
Her and her heart alone

I don't know what it is
But I know that I don't ever want to lose her
I want to hold her
Even as friends
And to carry each other through the thick of it

And struggle to remember
That we will only ever be friends
But maybe that is for the best