Shit rant poems

Breath

I hold my breath
I try to write
No more shaky pencils
Just trembling fingers on a keyboard
No not the musical kind
It's too much
So I'm writing
Writing everything I can
To get it out of my head
Onto the screen

My heart reminds me of a drum
Beating faster than I can handle

I've never published anything with my real thoughts
And now I have
But the anxieties are still there
But I've come to realise
That stories can remain invisible forever
Without the beady eyes of the internet feasting on my words
I still have tears threatening to fall
As I try not to be corny
Remaining vigilant, wanting to write more

It clears my head
And puts it into someone elses
Not like a cry for help
But someone to share things with

Not that I'm lonely
But the words scream and I'm dead
I can't help
The voices scream
My anxieties squeal

I know that my fear is real
But other emotions are too

So if I trust my head
And leave my heart to be self led

If only I could live all these words I write before I preach to the pages