A/n
Ok I realize I have not updated in over a week and I'm so sorry, that's really rotten of me. I just had a rough week but I won't let that happen again.
Second, THANK YOU SO MUCH to everyone that used #OnWednesdaysWeWearPlaid
And third I'm writing this on my phone so if there are typos I'll try to go back and fix them later.
- (I'm not fivesaucewhoop and BritishBums therefore this is not squishy this is Mc Smashy Ash)
"You're insecure don't know what for, you're turning heads when you walk through the door."
Sitting at my table in the back of the room I drummed my fingers idily to the music while the rest of the guys got down on the dance floor.
Luke was dancing with Charlotte, Michael with Erin who had showed up for the reception and Calum way eyeing some older girl at the bar.
Sighing I picked up my water glass to take a sip when suddenly a shadow crossed in front of me blocking my light. Started I looked up and was surprised to find Mr. Stacey looking down at me.
"Um.... Hi," I mumbled.
"You are so adorable!" She laughed, "I need to dance with you."
I tried to tell that I was half Irish and didn't dance however she ignored me, grabbing me by the hand and pulling me behind her to the center of the room where she proceeded to shake her massive, melon like breasts in my face.
"Mrs. Stacey," I sighed.
"Call me Regina," she laughed.
"Fine," I mumbled, "Regina, you seem really nice and everything but I'm kind of uncomfort......"
Ignoring me she wrapped her arms around my waist pulling me against her so that my face was situated in between her boobs. Knowing full well I was a dead man if my Mom ever found out I tried to pull away however her grip only tightened.
"You're a good dancer," she praised even through I was just flailing around trying not to suffocate in her boobs.
"My first husband, some loser who wanted to keep my last name so his name would be George George. He looks just like you."
"That's nice," I gasped.
"Yeah," she laughed, "he was a total ass hole though, I shouldn't have ever left Aaron for him."
"Who?" I questioned politely.
"Oh, sorry," she giggled, "you know Erin Samuels, Michael's girlfriend, her Dad and I used to date."
"That's uh.... Nice." I mumbled.
"He was a dream boat," she sighed, "I've never done a guy that big since, although you're hands are like baseball mitts kid and you know what they say about big hands."
Horrified I pulled away from her.
"What's wrong?" She pouted.
"Regina... Mrs. Stacey!" I cried, "I'm eighteen!"
"Exactly," she giggled, "you're legal. You want to do a quickly in the bathroom?"
"No!" I gasped.
"Come on!" She cried, "No one has to know."
"Mrs. Stacey no offense but you're old. And I kind if want my first time to be with someone.... I don't know I care about... Not my friend's Mom at his sister's wedding!"
"You're a virgin!" She gasped squishing my cheeks, "That is so cute!"
"Is there a problem here?" A voice said behind me.
