Hetalia one-shots

Would you rather have... (DenNor, FrUK, America, Lithuania)

** apparently based off an episode of Friends **

"Wow, Arthur!" Matthias moaned as he ate more cake. "This cake is like so good, you have no idea."

Arthur smiled as he leaned against the back of Alfred's chair. "Thank you. It's nice at least someone likes my food." He glared at the aforementioned man, who just shrugged innocently.

"Dude, just get a room." Alfred said.

Matthias' eyes lit up. "Oh, I would get a room with this cake!" he took another bite and stared down at it lovingly. "I think I could show this cake a good time..."

"If you had to choose," Arthur spoke up, and the others turned to look at him -- Alfred's best friend Toris, Arthur's partner Francis, and Matthias' partner Lukas. "What would you rather have: food, or sex, Matthias?"

"Food." Matthias said immediately.

Lukas turned to glare at him passive-aggressively. "Don't answer any faster, idiot..."

Matthias froze. "Oh-- Norge, when he said sex, I wasn't thinking about sex with you..."

Lukas just rolled his eyes.

"Toris, what about you?" Arthur looked at the soft-spoken dark-haired man. "What would you rather have, sex or food?"

"Sex." Toris said, again with only a small pause. Arthur looked mildly surprised.

Alfred grinned at him. "Yeah, but would you rather have sex or dinosaurs?"

"..." Toris stared off into space without answering. Alfred laughed to himself. That would be a hard one for anyone. "Oh my god," Toris finally said. "It's like Sophie's Choice..."

Alfred patted his shoulder before looking at Francis, who had been watching all of this surprisingly quiet. "What about you, Frannie, sex or food?"

"Hm..." The French were known to be lovers of both, so this would be interesting. "Hm... I do not know, too hard." He sniffed dramatically.

"No, you have to choose." Arthur said sharply. "Everyone else did. What would you give up?"

"Food... No, sex... No, food! Sex! Food! Dammit, I want both now, I want girls, naked, on bread!"

Silence.

"Correction: I want you, naked, on bread."

"Gross, dude, that's my brother." Alfred just wrinkled his nose.