(This chapter is focusing on the stresses and mental health of people under a lot of pressure. In this case Jay is becoming very stressed and taking it out in the wrong way. TW for abuse, domestic abuse, swearing, and injuries.)
I know sometimes they say not asking questions is best but I think now is the time when questions are needed. The whole ride back from the hospital was awkward and now we were finally at home it was even worse.
"Jay are you okay?" I smiled sitting on the bed with him. He moved away then he stood up and walked away from me. He stood against the cupboard looking at me.
"Erin? Don't freak out. I need to leave for a while."
"What the hell? Why?"
"Because I said I need to." He shouted.
"Don't you dare shout at me! Tell me what's happening. Literally don't even get funny with me. Where are you going? Why are you going there?"
"I'm going to Afghan."
"You've got to be kidding me?"
"Erin you don't control my life!" He shouted. I stood up and went over to him punching his chest. He was shouting back at me and he shoved me backwards.
"You tell me you will be there for us? Me and the kids? Our family but no? Instead you go off to India and leave me with 2 children and a pregnancy." I screamed at him. I went back up to him and shouted. I grabbed his fists and then he took mine and the next thing I felt was a punch to the face. I fell to my knees and cried slowly.
"Oh my god Erin. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to do that." He panicked, he knelt down and tried to hug me. I just crawled away from him, and laid against the bed on the floor sobbing.
**
Seeing her like this broke me. I didn't even know what just took over my body. My fist went flying and bam now she's on the floor sobbing her heart out in front of me. I stayed kneeling down looking at her but she was just completely numb, crying and almost screaming.
"Erin I'm so sorry." I sighed holding her hand.
"I just don't know what's going on." She whispered. "I'm sorry.." She got out like a small tearful whisper. Then she dug her nails in my face and pushed me away. She stood up and I got up, grabbed her arm to pull her back but she started fighting back at me. She punched me twice so I pushed her back and something just took over my body, I was angry and fuming about it all.
**
I closed my eyes and put my hands around my tummy. To think the kids were fast asleep during all of this, he wasn't saying anything just doing what he was. I tried to protect myself but I couldn't do anything. I couldn't really move. I couldn't even feel the pain anymore I'd become so numbed. Then finally he left and I hear the bedroom door slam shut so I managed to drag myself towards the bed. My hand was on the bed but I couldn't move, I just laid on the floor sobbing my absolute heart out.
**
Dad made me jump when he come into the kitchen. I was sat at the table drinking water.
"Hey Flo." He sighed.
"Are you okay? What's happened to your face?" I smiled when I noticed he was bleeding, he had a nose bleed and a split lip.
"Leave it Florence."
"Dad please?"
"Leave it." He spat grabbing a beer and walking out the front door. I just washed up my glass and went back upstairs. Mums bedroom door was closed but I could hear her. I went closer to the door and knocked.
"Mum are you okay?" I called.
"Yeah... go to bed." Her tearful voice called back. I just sighed and went into my room and sat back down in my bed. Harvey was fast asleep from what I could hear. I managed to get myself off to sleep again.
2:00am.
I could hear mum, she wasn't screaming really loud but she was screaming, crying and sounded like she was in a lot of pain. I got up and went over to the bedroom door, I didn't even knock this time I just opened it and saw mum laying on the floor, she was gripping onto the quilt cover for strength. She was crying so hard. When I kicked the door closed behind me and knelt down with her she was laying in blood. Like there was blood under her, she was bruised and battered.
"Mum what has happened to you? Where's dad?" I whispered gently as I stroked her face.
"It hurts.." She cried holding my hand and crying on me.
"Where's dad?" I smiled but she was in far too much pain to answer me. "What shall I do?"
"Stay.." She whispered. I grabbed my phone and text Kim.
'Kim it's Florence. I need you to get here right now.'
'Flo it's 2 in the morning. What's wrong?'
'It's mum. Bring Adam please.'
'On my way sweetie. I'll let myself in with the spare key don't panic.' I chucked my phone on the bed and held mum in my arms.
"What happened mum?"
"Don't worry.." She sighed.
"Mum did dad do this?" I smiled stroking her hair, she was bleeding from her nose, cheek and lip. She was bruised and completely battered and it made me feel so bad that I didn't do more earlier. "Mum? Did he do this earlier?" She just nodded and closed her eyes before crying.
**
I woke up Adam and we got dressed.
"What do you think has happened?" He smiled.
"I have no clue. When I text Florence back though the 2nd time she told me to bring any medical stuff that I could find." I sighed.
"Do you think it's the baby?"
"I hope not. I also think she would of gone to the hospital if it was the baby." I smiled as we went out to the car. I had a bag with me that was full of everything out the medical box. There was a towel, a few bandages, some pressure dressings and pain meds. Adam drove us over to Erin's and the bedroom light was on, the curtains were still open. I jumped out and let myself into the house.
"Hello? Florence?" I shouted from the bottom of the stairs, Adam followed me in and we went upstairs. I went to the bedroom door and nearly had a heart attack. Florence was sat on the floor hugging Erin, Erin was laying in blood and all on the quilt and sheets. She was holding on to Florence with all her heart. Erin was battered, bruised and looked more like she'd been mugged.
"Florence darling what's happened?" I smiled.
"I'm not sure." She sighed.
"Adam take her downstairs and make her a cup of tea please." I smiled as she got up and went with him. I sat on the floor with Erin and got the first aid kit. "What's happened to you my darling?"
"We had a fight and it was my fault. I wasn't sure when to shut up.." She got out in anxiety. She was having a panic attack.
"Okay calm down. Jay did this to you?"
"Hmm." She nodded and with that she passed out.
"Adam come here." I shouted.
"What's wrong?"
"Get an ambulance." I sighed.
"What happened?" He smiled as he dialled the ambulance.
"She had an argument with Jay."
"Jay did this?"
"Yeah." I sighed.
"Hello yes, ambulance please. It's for Detective Erin Lindsay. She's 7 weeks pregnant and has been involved in a domestic." Then he went silent. "No she's not dealing with a case. It's a home domestic." He sighed. "Detective Jay Halsted." Then he hung up.
"So?" I smiled as I lifted Erin's head up as she woke up again.
"Ambulance is on it's way. Trudy and Kevin are going to be there for arrest on arrival."
"We don't know where Jay is though..." I tried dialling his number but there was no answer.
"Well let's focus on Erin for now." He smiled.
**
I knew I couldn't leave things how they were. I headed back down our road. Our front garden was full of police and paramedics. An ambulance and 2 police cars. I approached the front door when Kevin grabbed me.
"Jay Halstead I am arresting you on the counts of GBH, domestic abuse, domestic violence. You do not have to say anything but anything you do say will be taken in consideration in court." He sighed cuffing me.
"No Kevin come on. You've got this wrong."
"I'm also arresting you on the count of being drunk and disorderly." He shoved me against the car. "Do you know what you've done to the poor girl?"
"She was fine when I left her?" I screamed out.
"Well she's spent the past 3 hours laying around in horrific pain, in her own blood crying and screaming. You're daughter found her about 1 hour ago." He shoved me against the car again. I stood there and watched as 4 paramedics bought out the bed. Erin was strapped to it under the blanket, blood was already soaking through the sheets covering her. Kim was by her side and Adam was putting the children into his car before he drove off with the lights and sirens on. Kim got on the ambulance with her as they all drove off.
"Can't I see my own wife?"
"Jay you are being arrested." He sighed shoving me into the car. Trudy was driving. Kevin sat in the back with me. I rested my head against the window and cried. What on earth had I done?
"Will you give me updates about Erin?"
"I will when we hear anything. Kim's with her."
"Where am I being taken?"
"To the district to be questioned. I'd keep your mouth shut when we go in because when Hank comes back from the scene he's going to kill you." Atwater sighed as he checked his phone.
**
Kim's point of view.
Even the ambulance journey was tough and go.
"Come on Erin." I smiled. "You've got this. Be strong. Think of the baby and the children." I squeezed her hand. She just mumbled and hummed something. She was like broken completely. I kept squeezing her hand and then she went floppy and her machine went absolutely mental. The paramedic got up and was messing around with all the machines.
"Is she okay?"
"I mean she's dropping in vitals. She needs to be in hospital to get better. Once she's in hopsital she'll be okay. We just need to get her into a bed and on ICU maternity ward because this bleeding is not good. I can't tell if she's having a miscarriage or just the trauma has caused bleeding."
"How long is it to the hospital though?"
"About another 10 minutes."
"She's not going to make it is she?"
"Think positively." He smiled. I just nodded and sat back down, holding Erin's hand again. I was covered in blood still, she was covered in blood. Her face was unrecognisable because of the swelling.
When we finally pulled up at med it was clearly called in as a big emergency because 5 people jumped on Erin's case and pulled her into the hospital. I followed a little bit behind and they took her straight into ICU. I was asked to stand outside the room and I just watched in. Will, Connor, Natalie, April and 2 midwifery specialist nurses were all in there.
**
I got dumped in the interview room. I heard Hank shouting from outside the door. I was tapping the table then the door burst open and Hank come up to me, grabbed me by new shirt neck and pinned me against the wall.
"What the hell were you thinking? You could of killed Erin?"
"I wasn't thinking straight. We were having an argument and I was feeling really angry and then it all just happened."
"You disgust me. So much Jay. If you don't end up in general prison I will make sure you'll divorce Erin."
"You can't do that. We love each other, like we are happy together."
"Oh yeah so happy that you beat the shit out of her. Go sober up." He threw me back down before walking away from me. He slammed the door behind me and I knew the next thing coming was going to be me facing a judge.
**
Kim.
I was finally allowed to go in. April and Natalie stood in there.
"Is she okay?" I smiled.
"She's stopped bleeding, but we still aren't sure if she's miscarried or not. We are going to check in a few hours when the pain meds kick in. She's in pain from the bruises, and battering. Who did this Kim?"
"All she told me was she had an argument with Jay. It got tense and now look at her. When I arrived this morning Florence was sat on the floor cuddling her mum covered in blood. It was Florence who called me this morning." I sighed.
"Don't blame yourself Kim. At least you went around there and helped." Nat smiled.
"Is it okay if I take some photos of her to use in the charging?" I smiled. April nodded and they both stood back while I took some photos. Seeing someone who Erin looked broke my heart. Knowing this was hurting me. She was in so much pain and so sore she couldn't open her eyes so I didn't know if she was awake yet. Basically her whole had swollen, was bruised and bloodied.
"I love you Erin." I whispered.
"I love you too." She managed a small whisper. Her eyes were partly open and she bought her shaking hand up a little. She stroked the side of my face gently.
"I'm so sorry I let this happen.."
"Not you're fault." She sighed as I squeezed her hand. She managed a small smile and I just couldn't believe what I'd just witnessed. There was a knock on the door and it was Will.
"Hey Will." I smiled.
"Hiya. Just letting you know she isn't having a miscarriage. It's the trauma has caused some bleeding. We'll do a scan in a little while anyway but for now she needs to rest up." He smiled. He went out quietly and shut the door behind him. I sat down with Nat and April on the sofa in the corner and I just watched her every move.
"What's going to happen do you think? Like with Jay?"
"I'm not sure. She will be devastated if Jay gets sentenced but she won't want him home until she sorts the children out. It's confusing because she will want to be with him because she's so in love with him." I sighed.
"Yeah that's understandable." Nat smiled, she took my hand and squeezed it. They both had to go after a little while so I just sat there still watching Erin. She's gone for a sleep and she was laying to face me, her hand falling off the bed and her fingers just curled up and her wedding and engagement ring just there. There was a knock on the door and Hank come in.
"You alright my love?" He smiled sitting next to me.
"In a bit of shock really." I nodded trying not to cry.
"Yeah understandable. I'm just glad she's here and getting treatment. How is she?"
"They are a bit worried about the bleeding. She's not miscarried but if there is a lot of trauma going on it's going to be touch and go. They are also concerned because she's got broken ribs.
"Yeah.. she's unrecognisable almost isn't she?" He sighed. "Look at her, her nose and eyes are bruised. Her whole face is swollen and battered. Her hands are even shaking."
I reached out and held his hand gently.
"Hank she'll be okay. It won't be longer before she's back home with the children." I smiled.
"Yeah hopefully. I know what I want to do with Jay but now I know what I'm going to do."
"What's that?" I sighed sitting to face him.
"I'm going to start by having a talking to with him. Then I'm not pressing charges, I'm ensuring he goes away straight away on Monday morning with the rangers and serve his full term there."
"Okay yeah that sounds good. That gives us some time to get Erin the help and ensure she is better." I smiled.
"Exactly that. Right I'm going back to the district to tell him that then." He hugged me and kissed Erin's head before heading out.
**
Kevin was sat with me on his phone. I had my head resting on my hand. I was watching the door and I was just feeling tired and fed up with it all. I regretted everything that happened that night. There was nothing I felt proud of and nothing I was happy with. There was a knock on the door and Hank come in.
"Sarg." Atwater nodded before getting up and leaving.
"Jay, oh Jay." He sighed sitting opposite me.
"How is she?"
"In the hospital, she's being treated but she's pretty battered up. Luckily for you she doesn't want to press charges. But I can't leave you just go unpunished for it all. You've hurt my daughter so much."
"I know Hank I'm so sorry. Like it just happened. I was angry and under the influence. I am sorry."
"I know you think you are sorry but really I think you are just scared about what's coming next?" He sighed. "I'm letting you go home today and tomorrow and then Monday morning I will pick you up at 8:00am and you will go and serve a entire tour with the rangers, you are allowed back home for any medicals that involve yourself, Florence, Harvey or Erin. You are allowed home for the birth and 6 weeks post birth of the baby."
"I'm not going to jail?"
"No you are not. The main concern was that Erin might not make it through or even that she might want to press charges but she really doesn't. She loves you Jay and that's the reason she can't hurt you."" He sighed. "Just get yourself at that hopsital to be with Erin. I'll pick you up Monday morning. " He got up and walked out leaving me there to think about it all for a moment.