Hi Readers, I'm not sure if you guys are aware; but, along with this story, I also have another story called "Dawsey One-Shots". And I just wanted to let you know, if you're interested, I just posted another one called "The CEO and his Mistress". By the way, I'm also open to taking requests for one-shots. Just send me a message, and I'll see if I have any ideas for the one-shot that you want me to write. But for now, how about we go ahead and give you another chapter of this story? Enjoy.
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They had the radio currently playing in the RV, as Matt did need to stay awake as he drove down the interstate towards Ann Arbor, the first stop on their cross country road trip. And that truly was something that was going to be nice, especially since he was determined to visit something while they're there. And just what might that be? Well, as you know, Matt is quite a big football fan. And Ann Arbor just so happens to also be the home of the University of Michigan, the home of the Michigan Wolverines College Football team. And this stadium is actually quite historic, as it just so happens to be the largest stadium in the Western Hemisphere. He's yet to mention it to Gabby, but he would like to stop there if it's okay with her. So, he had to (unfortunately) turn down the radio. Luckily, he has controls on the steering wheel, so that makes it much easier when he needs to turn the volume up or down. However, Gabby got a bit concerned; or at least she did, until she saw Matt smiling. "What? Don't like my singing?" Matt laughed when he heard her say that. "Hey, of course not." Gabby agreed.
"Then what is it baby?" matt smiled at her. "So, I have actually done some research revolving places that I would personally like to stop on our road trip." Gabby agreed with Matt when he told her that, smiling. "So, the first stop that I'm looking at isn't for like another couple hours as we're just 45 minutes into our trip." Gabby agreed. "Yeah, so we need to figure out where we're going?" Matt smiled when his wife asked him that. "Well, we already know that today we're going to try and get through Michigan, maybe even part-way through Ohio. I'm not sure how far we're going to be able to get, but I hope that we're going to be able to get pretty far." Gabby agreed with Matt when he told her that, smiling as she wanted the same thing. "I want the same thing baby." Gabby smiled, agreeing with his beautiful wife when she said that. "Good, because I'm glad that you want the same thing. But what I was saying, the first place I want to go to his Ann Arbor." Gabby agreed with Matt when he said that. "Okay, why's that? And how far away is that?" Matt smiled. "Give or take 2 hours."
Gabby agreed with Matt when he said that. "Okay, well that's a lot of time to find places we want to visit. Or do you already have a place in mind?" Matt smiled when he heard Gabby ask him if he already has a place in mind. "Yeah, there is." Gabby smirked. "And where might that be?" Matt smiled as he went to grab her hand. "Okay, so you know how each college has a football stadium?" Gabby groaned. "You want to go to a football stadium?" Matt laughed. "Yeah, I do." Gabby shook her head. "Baby, we're on a sightseeing adventure. What's so important about this stadium?" Matt smiled. "It's the biggest stadium in the United States and the whole Western Hemisphere. Its official capacity is over 107,061 people; but it regularly hosts crowds of 115,000 people for football games." Gabby was shocked when she heard him say that. "Sorry, did you just say that 115,000 go to football games on a regular basis." Matt nodded, agreeing with his wife when she asked him that.
"On New Year's Day 2014, the Detroit Red Wings hosted the Toronto Maple Leafs in the annual winter classic. The attendance was 105,491. And in August 2014, they hosted a Manchester United-Real Madrid game. Man United beat Real Madrid 3-1 in front of a crowd of 109,318. So, it's quite historic." Gabby agreed with Matt when he said that, smiling at her husband as she heard him get enthusiastic over statistics that she doesn't really care about. "Wow, that's a lot of people."" Matt sighed when he heard Gabby say that. "Fine, we can bypass the stadium." Gabby shook her head when Matt told her that. "Hey, of course not baby. If you want to go see the stadium, then we can go to the stadium. I mean that, we can visit things. People me, I'm going to want to go places that you might not want to go too. Like some days, I may want to go shopping." Matt groaned when he heard that. That was, until he felt Gabby move her hand to his leg and say something he liked to hear. "I was thinking...maybe when we're in New York City, I can go to the Victoria's Secret store." Matt smirked.
"Oh, I like that idea." Gabby smirked. "And maybe I can go again in Miami, get a sexy little bikini that I can wear in the ocean; and that we can wear again when we go swimming at night, where we can make love to each other in the ocean." Matt laughed when he heard gabby say that, but he honestly did love that idea. "God, I am already in love with this road trip." Gabby agreed with Matt when she heard him say that, smiling as she felt the same way. "I think that this road trip is going to be what it takes to save our marriage." Matt sighed when he heard Gabby say that, not proud of the fact that they even need to go on a trip to save their marriage. "I hope you know that I am still very sorry about everything I said in May baby, it was the worst thing that I could've ever said." Gabby took a breath when she heard Matt say that. "You want to talk about it? Make that our first conversation of many on this trip?" Matt agreed with Gabby when she asked him that. "If you're okay with that, then I'm okay with it. However, I need to give you context baby." Gabby was confused.
"What do you mean Matt?" Matt took a breath and sighed when his wife asked him that. "Gabby, I really need you to hear me out as to the reason I'm really weary of us going ahead with trying for a baby. I know I've voiced my concerns and told you that, I'm worry that we'll loose you, that it'll be hard, that all that. I know, I keep repeating all of that stuff. But there's more baby." Gabby just looked at her husband when he told her that, feeling bad for him. "Want to talk about it?" Matt took a breath. "Only if we promise that we don't let this ruin the start of our trip, the start of our trip that I plan on staying on for months. If you think that it's not the right time for this, then we can stop baby; and I'll be fine if we stop." Gabby agreed with Matt when he said that. "Matt, I'm ready to talk about it. I want to talk about it. I want to hear what you have to say to me, as I can just hear it in your voice. There's something going on there." Matt took a breath and sighed.
"Yeah, there's something. Do you want to hear what it is?" Gabby agreed with her husband. "What is it baby?" Matt sighed. "Gabby, I hate to put it this way. But...I just don't know if I'm ready to lose another woman I love permanently."
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Gabby's POV:
When I heard Matt say that he's not ready to loose a woman whom he loves permanently, I took a breath as I knew exactly what he meant. He was talking about how he's already lost Hallie. He loved her, and that's a fact. I know that he loved her, and I can see it in his eyes that he really hates having to talk about it. But who can blame him for hating to have to talk about this? This isn't far for him to have to think about that time in relation to me, his wife this time. Hallie was just his fiancé, I'm his wife. "Matt, I..." Matt then just continued to speak to me. "Gabby, I get it. I get that you hate adoption. And I understand that. I will always understand your reasons, because they're valid. But, at the same time, you need to understand my reasons; because I feel like they're valid too. I feel like I need to be heard, and I don't feel like I really got that chance a couple months ago when we had that fight....speaking of which, I need to apologize again for what I said."
I just sighed as I thought about what he said to me during that fight. "Gabby, you can't have one (a baby)." Matt took a breath, before continuing. "Gabby, you have to know that I never meant to say that. I never meant to say it that way, nor was that how I meant for it to come out. If I could go back, I would've said it a hundred different ways; and I have been playing it back in my head. How I could've said it many different ways. But Gabby, I can't go back. I can't go back and unsay what I said, and we both know that. And that's why I'm so glad that you decided to come back to Chicago, so we can be together; so that we can save our marriage." I agreed with Matt when he said that, taking a breath. "Matt, can I just say something about that? How I felt the moment you said that?" Matt nodded, agreeing with me when I asked him if I could say something. "Hey, of course you can baby. That's the entire point of this trip...for us to talk and communicate."
Taking a breath, I was still a bit nervous as I really didn't know what I was going to say after hearing that. I still can't get that out of my head. But, I also need to tell him how I felt. "Matt, the minute you said that; I felt my heart break into a million pieces, and I felt like a failure." Matt just turned to look at me when I said that, worried. "Baby..." I shook my head. "Matt, don't deny that I can't feel that way. I can't give my husband a child, a child that he's always wanted. A child that's always been his dream come true, we both know that. Matt, that's just how I feel; and it's a fact. I'm not going to deny and say that I don't feel that way, because I do feel that way. I feel that way, and we're going to have to address it somehow." Matt agreed with me, taking a breath as he looked at me. "Gabby, I hope you know that I regret those words every single day. There isn't a single day that I wish I couldn't just go back, and take back those words; heck, that I could agree to this."
I looked at Matt when he said that. "You want to go back and agree to have a baby?" Matt took a breath and sighed as he continued to hold my hand with our fingers intertwined, stroking it with his thumb. "Gabby, I hope you know that this is hard. I feel like I failed you. Gabby, there's a lot more than you think going on. Gabby, you have to remember that baby; it wasn't just your baby, it was our child." I agreed with Matt when he told me that, deciding to just listen. "And that means that I'm partially responsible for the fact that the baby we created also created the aneurysm." I looked at Matt when he said that, really hoping that he doesn't say...but he did say it. "That means, indirectly; I created the thing that could kill you." I just looked at my husband when he said that, hating that he thinks that way. "Hey, baby; you can't think that way." Matt sighed when I said that. "But Gabby, that's how I feel. And that's just part of how I would feel if it went bad."
I was confused when I heard Matt say that. "What do you mean by that Matt?" Matt sighed as he turned his head and looked at me, seemingly scared at the moment. "Hey, completely honest and keep your eyes on the road baby." Matt agreed with me when I said that, turning his attention back to the road so that he can make sure that we're safe. "I know, I just feel at times like I should look at you when I'm saying that." I agreed with Matt when he told me that. "Then do you want to pull over and talk?" Matt shook his head. "If I stare at you, then it might be harder to say it." I agreed with Matt when he told me that, deciding to go back to listening to him (which is exactly what he wants me to do anyways). "So, what's on your mind baby?" Matt sighed when I asked him that, taking a breath before continuing. "Well, it's just...because I was the one who, in my mind, created the aneurysm; that means that I also created the thing that could kill you."
I just knew where this was going, and it was truly heartbreaking; as this is not what I want to hear from my husband. But I also know that I really don't have a choice in the matter, as I need to let Matt talk to me and just tell me what's going on in his head. If I don't let him tell me what's going on, then we'll just have a fight; and that's definitely not what I want on our first day of travel. So, I just took a breath and continued to listen to the man I love as he spoke to me too. "Gabby, I already created the aneurysm that could kill you if you get pregnant; and I'm the one that would be getting you pregnant, I know that. So....I just feel like..." I then finished his thought. "You'd think that, you killed me indirectly." Matt then just went silent, tearing up a bit. And that's when I knew that, that was exactly how he felt about the situation. And that just broke my heart; as that was not how I wanted the man I love more than anything in the entire world to feel about the situation.
But, I can't control how he feels about the situation. I need to understand that he feels this way, and I need to help him just deal with how he feels; how he needs to just get the help he needs to ensure that he can get through exactly how he's feeling right now, which I know is going to cause him problems for a while. Yet, at the same time....I just wish that I could really do something that can help him. But I don't know how I can do that. How I can truly help the man I love. "Matt, I didn't know all of this. Heck, I didn't think of all of this." Matt agreed with me when I said that, taking a breath as he concentrated on driving today. But, I just knew that this conversation wasn't done; rather, it was just getting started. "Do you want me to drive after we make our first stop?" Matt sighed as he looked at me. "Do you want to rotate driving?" I shrugged when Matt asked me that. "Depends, are you open to us rotating? Or would you rather drive the entire time."
Matt took a breath when I asked him that, before smiling at me. "I think that we can rotate every once and a while. Then, you aren't the only one asking the questions; and I can concentrate on helping you. Plus, we're going to have to take it easy eventually. I also don't want this trip to last too long. I know what I said but..." I just looked at Matt when he said that. "Hey, don't you dare. You are not putting a timeline on how long I get to spend time with my husband. I want to spend as much time with you as possible, and that's just a fact. So, that's what we're going to do okay baby?" Matt agreed with me when I told him that, smiling as he (obviously) liked the idea of us just spending as long as we want on our road trip. "Want to go up to Alaska?" I laughed when I heard Matt ask me if I want to make my way all the way up to Alaska. "Never happening. I just want to take it easy and relax with you. I want to do easy places that we can access here on the interstates."
Matt agreed with me when I said that. "I was thinking maybe we'd, at some point, take Route 66 from Santa Monica to Chicago." I shrugged when Matt said that. "I don't know. I mean, maybe. I just like the idea of us staying on the main highways that are easy to drive on. I know that you'd probably do it easily, but I want to take it easy." Matt agreed with me when I said that, smiling at me as we were both really happy with each other right now. And I really mean that, as I do not believe that we've been this happy in a while. "By the way, one thing we need to talk about; it's whether we want to stay in some cities for a couple nights." I agreed with Matt when he asked me that. "I already know that I want to stay in New York City maybe 5 or 6 nights. 1 per borough, maybe take in a Broadway show." Matt agreed with me when I said that, apparently really liking the idea of a Broadway show. "I want to walk down the Hollywood Walk of Fame." I agreed.
"Oh, and maybe we could go to Hamilton for the Broadway show. I've heard it's really good." Matt laughed, agreeing with me. "Whatever you want babe." I looked at Matt when he told me that, a bit taken aback that he was so open to letting me plan the entire trip; as I want him to be involved. "Baby, are you sure?" Matt nodded, smiling at me when I asked him if he was sure that he'd be okay with going. "Baby, of course I'm okay with going to the show. All that matters to me at the end of the day, is that you're happy and that we have fun with each other." I agreed with him when he told me that, smiling as he truly is the man of her dreams. "Want to listen to some of the songs from the show?" Matt laughed, agreeing with me when I asked him if he'd like to listen to some of the songs. "Sure, go ahead and start playing the songs on your phone. You can connect it via USB I think." I agreed with Matt when he said that, glad that this was the plan for what we're doing.
Turning my head to look at Matt, I could help but feel happy right now; as this is the dream, my dream life. I have the perfect husband, the perfect life with him, and we're starting off this new adventure together in an RV. Sure, it may be weird; and it may be a weird way for us to really start our married life. "I swear, I can't help but wonder if this is what we should've done right after we got married?" Matt took a breath when I said that. "You mean, go on a trip together?" I agreed with Matt when he asked me if I was talking about us going on a trip together, which we never did because we had Louie at the time. "I mean, don't get me wrong. I loved having Louie in our life, and I was so glad that we got to raise him for as long as we did; but we really missed out on some of the things that we should've done when we first got married. The honeymoon, the time together in an undisclosed location." Matt laughed when I said that, agreeing with me.
I then went ahead and grabbed his hand, proceeding to intertwine our fingers. "Maybe we can think about doing that in the future? Us doing a vow renewal sometime, and treating it as our real wedding?" Turning his head when he heard me ask him that, Matt smiled as he absolutely loved the proposal that I just made to him. For them to go ahead and basically have a redo of their wedding in the future must be exactly what he wants some time. He wants a redo of it all, and he wants to give me a proper wedding. "Oh, this is definitely a conversation that I want to have for a while." I agreed with Matt when he said that. "So, would you want to do it in a church; or would you want to do it somewhere else?" Matt smirked when I asked him that. "We could always do it at the firehouse." I laughed when I heard Matt say that, thinking that he was joking. But the truth was that, he wasn't joking. He actually did like the idea of us getting married at the firehouse. "Seriously?"
Matt shrugged when I asked him if he was being seriously about the idea of us getting married; well, having a vow renewal, at the firehouse. "You seriously want to do it at the firehouse?" Matt shrugged when I asked him that. "I mean, it's where we met and fell in love." I agreed with Matt when he said that, smiling as I thought back to all of the times where I wished he was mine. "I swear, I was always so envious of the fact that Hallie was the woman on your arm; the place were I wanted to be." Matt agreed with me when I told him that. "Oh, I was well aware of the fact that was where you wanted to be." I looked at Matt when he told me that. "Really?" Matt nodded, smirking when I asked him if he really knew that I wanted to be on his arm. "Of course I knew that baby. It was obvious whenever you looked at me; correction, stared at me. Especially when I walked out of the shower in a towel." I just laughed when I heard Matt say that, knowing that was the truth.
"What? The handsome lieutenant I had a crush on was really hot. You were taken, and I wasn't blind. So, sorry. But, I had every right to look, but not touch. That was what I told myself, I can look...but I can't touch." Matt just laughed when he heard me say that, well aware of the exact time period in their lives that I was talking about. "Oh, but you wanted to do so much more than just look." I snickered and agreed with Matt when he said that. "Hey, at least now I don't have to share your attention with any other woman." Matt agreed with me when I said that. "To tell you the truth, I don't think you ever have." I was confused when I heard Matt say that. "Uhm, last time I checked...you were engaged to Hallie at one point." Matt agreed with me when I said that. "Yeah, but I wanted to kiss you that night at the Christmas party." I agreed with Matt when he told me that. "Do you ever think back at what our life would've looked like had you kissed me that night?"
Matt sighed when I asked him that. "All the time to tell you the truth. Maybe we would've had a kid, and then never had the aneurysm." I sighed when he said that, well aware that there are a lot of choices that he would (obviously) like to go back and glace if he had the chance to do so. "You want to go back and do a lot of things differently, don't you baby?" Matt agreed with me when I asked him if there was a lot of things that he wanted to do differently. "Oh definitely, and I think it all goes back to that night. Another thing I always thought about, was how the hell I never got you pregnant on our first night together." I laughed; no, hollered; when I heard him say that, as it was funny. "Oh my god, that night was incredible." Matt agreed with me when I said that. "God, I miss those types of nights. That's what I really want. I want to have fun with you baby." I agreed with Matt when he said that, feeling the same way. I just want to have fun with my man all the time.
"Well, that would've been fun, and I am so glad that's what we're going to do for the rest of our lives." Matt agreed with me, smiling. "Maybe even in Hawaii. I was thinking, what if...when we're in LA, we book a flight to Hawaii for a couple days. That way, we can hit 49 of the 50 states?" I smiled when he asked me that. "That actually sounds like a lot of fun. Maybe we can even do the same when we're in Miami at some time?" Matt was a bit confused when I asked him that. "What state can we fly to from Miami?" I smiled at Matt when he asked me that. "Puerto Rico? I want you to go there for a week maybe?" Matt smiled when I asked him if we can go to Puerto Rico for a bit. "I like the idea. We'll have to figure out when and how we can do it." I agreed with Matt when he said that, smiling as that sounds like a lot of fun. "We can volunteer too."
Matt agreed with me. "On one condition." I looked at Matt when he said that. "Oh, and what condition is that?" Matt smiled at me. "My wanting to go to Puerto Rico is void if you're pregnant at the time. I am not flying with you pregnant under any circumstances." I agreed with matt when he told me that, smiling as that sounded perfect. "I can definitely deal with that." Matt laughed, smiling as I told him that. "I had a feeing that you would agree to that." I nodded, agreeing with the man I love when he told me that. "What can I say? I'm learning that we both can't get what we want all the time." Matt agreed with me when I said that. "Hey, at least I get to live a life with the woman I love; so I get that all the time." I agreed with Matt when he said that, proceeding to grab his hand as we both just held each other close. "I swear, you are so cheesy; and I hope that you know that baby." Matt nodded, smiling at me as I said that. "Oh, I know that I'm cheesy. But you love it." I agreed with Matt when he stated that I love it. "Oh, I do love it. That's a fact that I'll never deny."
We then both proceeded to grab each other's hands. With us holding each other close, me and Matt both went to intertwine our fingers. And I just love that feeling. The feeling of his hand in mine is all I want in life, for the rest of my life. "Matt, can I ask you a question?" Matt agreed. "Of course you can. What's up baby?" I took a breath. "Had I asked you to move to Puerto Rico with me, what would be your answer?" Matt bit his lip when I asked him that, not sure. "I'm not sure." I agreed with Matt when he told me that, smiling. "Would you have been open to it?" Matt shrugged. "I'd have to think about it. Why, did you really like it there over the summer?" I nodded, agreeing with Matt when he asked me whether I really liked it in Puerto Rico over the summer. "I did actually, it was a lot of fun; and I felt like I was making a difference in the world." Matt got a bit...concerned when I said that. "Do you not feel like you make a different in the world in Chicago?"
I took a breath. "Not as much of a difference. Sure, I'm a paramedic there; and that's great and all. But there's just something about being a volunteer there that made me smile all the time." Matt agreed with me as I told him that. "Well, I'm glad that you're good with talking to me about this baby. I know that it's probably not what you like to tell me. How you'd rather be in Puerto Ri..." I interrupted him when he said that. "Hey, that's not at all what I'm trying to say. Baby, I want to be with you. I love you, and I want to be your wife. That's my priority. If me being your wife means that I need to be here in Chicago, then sign me up." Matt smiled when I said that, absolutely loving the sound of that (obviously); as it means that I want to be his wife for the rest of my life. "Good, because I want that too baby." I agreed. "Good, because my brother would kill you if we ever got a divorce." Matt gulped when I said that, agreeing with me. "I can see that happening."
I agreed with Matt when he told me that. "Don't worry, I'll protect you from my brother each and every day for the rest of my life. I promise baby." Matt agreed with me when I told him that. "Good, because that's going to be what's needed just in case..." Matt then stopped talking, not wanting to finish his sentence. "Sorry, I can't finish that sentence. Do you know what I'm trying to say though?" I agreed with Matt when he told me that. "You seem like you need to cry baby. Is everything okay?" Matt took a breath. "I guess, I'm still thinking about how I spoke to you. Just talking about it doesn't mean that this makes it easier." I agreed with Matt when he said that, well aware of the fact that sometimes talking about something doesn't mean that you're okay. "Do you want to wait until we're pulled over? Maybe we can sit in the back as we eat somewhere?" Matt smiled at me when I asked him that. "Do you want to eat in here, or in the restaurant?"
I smiled when Matt asked me that. "I wouldn't mind eating in here. Who knows, maybe we can just take it easy for a bit?" I smiled, agreeing with Matt. "Or do you want to eat in Ann Arbor?" Matt shrugged. "It's up to you. If you want to eat there, we can have that conversation that we promised we'd talk about." I agreed with him. "How you want me to go by Ms. Casey now?" Matt sighed. "Do you even want to talk about it?" I smiled when he asked me that. "Let's find ourselves something nice to eat when we're in Ann Arbor, we can cuddle in bed; then we can rotate driving. I don't want you to have to drive all the time." Matt shook his head. "Baby, I'm the one who took the test and has the license remember." Gabby then remembered that. "Right, I remember that now. But yeah, let's do that. Let's get something to eat, and then we can relax in Ann Arbor for a bit. See the stadium and everything." Matt agreed with me, smirking as I told him that.