In my little world ( Completed )

YES I CAME TO KNOW

Anjana's narration :
Yay it's weekend ! I can lie down in my Shav asan (a relaxing yoga pose) for the whole day with no worries - I danced in my dreams 💃and switched off the ringing alarm that was making noise.
Ironically, I couldn't sleep and well that's because of what happened yesterday.
Misery and hardships which I have been experiencing more or less in milder forms since I moved into this new team have piled up so much that I was exasperated.😑 From the beginning it was clear that things and people were not like what I expected, and started finding my feet. Only for the sake of financial benefit I get I'm still working, otherwise I derive no interest and satisfaction from this job😩 But how long should I endure the misdeeds from my fellow teammates and stay with disinterest receiving no recognition for my work ?😔
"Surprised, how a philosophical girl like you can get disturbed ? Stop bothering them. Apart from tripping and falling down, did you gain anything by being despondent ?" said someone who met me while walking down the stairs.

What did I get after choosing to ignore them ? being nice and often not confronting their actions gave them the chance to make use of my shoulder for firing their rifle guns.🔫 Some of them have no guts to face the consequences of criticising or commanding other people, instead use me to get their work done, like a cue ball in snookers! 🎱 In the end I get registered in the bad books of those people whom I criticize . Because I stay silent, they take all the credit and my manager blatantly believes them. I can't force myself to refrain from getting distraught whenever I see them and can't work peacefully. 😕
I let out all my frustration😰 and Achyuth gave his ears while he accompanied me down stairs.

" First stop considering your self inferior to others.What are you scared of ? Why can't you give it back to them ? I don't mean that you're weak or anything , but eventually you will loose all your patience being vulnerable and working with Priyanka, Ashish, and Manoj ( my teammates ). Been there! worked with them and had a complete knowledge of their slyness.😣 Channelise your strength to upgrade to the best version of your self, where others cannot order or dare to take the advantage of you."
" Second, Undeniably office politics happen everywhere, and everybody has to play their own game. Needless to say that Shivam (my manager ) or the HR are not excluded from it. You reach nowhere, if you engage in playing a victim card and repenting on your actions. Think about it ! Start your own game"👊
he left with these words and I came back to hostel.
I revisited the scene and his words once again.
Yes, I underestimate myself and I'm scared. With the fear of receiving defamatory remarks and stereotypes which might impact my profile - I become vulnerable. I am scared and doubt my capabilities of finding another job, so I endure all the mistreatment. 😢
The day I become superior acquiring more skills, I can rebel against that lobby in my team and can survive outside if they sack me out ! 🙅
All the uncertainty and distress residing in my mind vanished paving a way to introspect and become better. How can someone so accurately understand what I have been going through ? Physically I'm lying on my bed but my heart is wandering around someone who is not here. 👼
That someone whom I hated once, that person who was cheeky yet spunky. Sarcastic but not selfish. 😎
The man who didn't step back to wipe off after noticing my wet eyes.😭

That magical touch, warm and soft reminding my father's fingers and assuring that I'm not alone, in this world which is heavily populated but difficult to find a helping hand. 😇
Once again, he came forward to detach my despair persuading towards my goals, proving me wrong that every stubborn and talented person is a snob and can't stay grounded.
At this moment, I realized - he is the man I wanted in my life.
Its time to stop holding back my feelings, which I have been doing purposefully.Speculating that I being a mediocre is not meant to expect someone who is exceptionally brilliant to like me in return. 😷
Many conscious decisions were made by me to avoid encounters with him in the office and outside ( in process of cancelling the bet to help the poor children, there is also a hidden intension to stay away from him) Although subconsciously I yearn for his presence. 😓
Thought that I would overcome the infatuation, by repressing my feelings ! However I learned that repression only increased and strengthened my attraction towards him paradoxically ! 😍
Finally there's a need to stay true to my conscience and admit the fact without hiding from myself - I started loving you Achyuth. 💕
Because :

Fingers might point out at me - calling opportunistic, gold digger , undeserving.👉 I don't mind what people and society would say, all that matters is to know where do I stand in Achyuth's life. Don't want to give up without trying and live with that regret of - why did I hold back ? What if he had accepted me ?
Let's face the reality and look forward at what destiny has to offer ! 👍
**********
My prime focus at office shifted from work to that special person, leaving no stone unturned to see and fall in his eyes. 👼
One day I saw Achyuth laughing at the cafeteria with his teammates.
Oh no ! I cursed my fate for missing that spot sitting beside him. 😪
My chocolate cake suffered the brutal stabs, 🍰🍴 resulted out of the aggression, when my eyes caught the glimpse of Akriti holding Achyuth's forearm and pulling him back while he was leaving.
How did she dare to touch him.😬
I keenly observed and she held his hand for 46 seconds. I wish there's nothing going between them 😩
After the office hours I stopped pk at the parking. We had a casual talk initially and later asked his penny of thoughts regarding Akriti and Achyuth. " I don't know, but there's no smoke without fire. May be she likes him " answered pk.
************
Are they dating each other ? There's no sense of discomfort on his face when she held his hand and these days I find them constantly hanging out together at every corner of office premises.
Akriti is a good looking,👰 intelligent ideal lady which every guy fancies and there's every reason for Achyuth to like her.
Insecurities emerged raising questions over my physique and appearance. Do I look bad ? I asked myself looking at my reflection in the mirror !😮

*****Hello dear readers. Hope you all are doing good and as every one is aware of the transition of the pandemic to a community transmission stage. The actual fight for the existence has started now, avoid going out unnecessarily and in this crucial time a few seconds of carelessness can cost your life. I know it's tiring to wash and sanitise everyday, but An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure - Benjamin Franklin. We all know the terrible situation of Indian health care system and trust me I being a doctor is helpless after witnessing the situation of some of the infected ones. And don't hesitate to consult your nearby hospitals as soon as you find symptoms. I wish and pray for the well being of you all. STAY SAFE.*******