Used To This

~What Do I Do As My Father's Daughter?~

Camila's P.O.V.

When I was a child I've always dreamed of wearing the most beautiful gown that I could probably and hopefully could design just so I would be able to wear it on the most memorable day in my life. I remember planning everything in the past, I think I was around 7 when I for to wear my first ever white dress that my father had given to me as a gift.

White roses and red ones where what I really loved, I drew my own bouquet that I really want to hold when I get to walk down the aisle. I think there were about more than 20 sketches of me with only those things but I ended it since I realized that I wasn't that much gifted in drawing and you really can't understand what the heck was that object is.

But hey! I tried my very best when doing that!

Then I also planned to have a small tiara veil just because I wanted to look like a princess, I've always wanted to have a fairytale or princess themed wedding as it would be me who would look the most beautiful and most elegant woman then. I would want to feel like I was a queen as I dance with the love of my life so several hours non stop with our backgrounds filled with nothing but candles or orange lights in the dark.

I loved watching Disney movies, usually I would be pretending to be the princess itself and picturing it in my mind that one day I would be able to meet the prince that is meant for me. The prince who can make me feel as if I was his queen because the princess that we both have would be our beautiful daughter...

Tangled for me was my most favorite movie, I could just see myself to her. Not the whole story line but as Rapunzel, the way she's always curious about things, the way she's so imaginative, so filled with dreams and positivity, I just really felt as if I was her and my Eugene might probably be just as close to me just like in the movie.

Marriage for me is the most sacred and beautiful thing that could happen to one person especially to a woman. It might be the most memorable, more nerve wreaking and probably one of the most scariest thing that you could ever think of because you're going to be a part of someone else, you're giving your life to that sole man for you to bond and live the rest of your life together as man and wife.

It's like you're giving your whole self to the man you vow to love and be with until the end, it's a way of showing how much you both love and care about each other. Marriage is that kind of thing that makes any woman feel as if she's the most beautiful and luckiest woman in the world. That was what I would hopefully feel when I get married.

For a minute I thought that maybe I was just imagining things. Maybe I must've just misheard him or anything as there's no way, there's no possible way on why he would ask me to marry him as a way of me repaying back to all the good things he's done for me.

There's just so way that he asked me to marry him!

My mind was still a wreak from crying, worries were still clouding my mind for my fathers welfare and then this?... I must only be going crazy because he wouldn't...

Shawn wouldn't do this to me... I know him, he wouldn't force me...

Yet what is he doing now?

I'm so confused, I was speechless and was just looking at him with unshed years in my eyes. I felt like he was trying to use me, to get me fall when I am in my most vulnerable state. He shouldn't be doing this to me... 

"Shawn this isn't the time to joke around like this, my father is almost close to dying and here you are! Telling me to marry you as if that's the only thing that you care about. I...."

It was so hard to control my emotions, to keep it at bay when all I wanted was just to explode and tell him everything I am thinking of. I wanted to scream at him, to get angry at him at this point but I couldn't help but to still look and treat him with respect.