Sapphire's Review Store 2.0

Review by Tiana: The Bibliophile Teen

Title: The Bibliophile Teen

Author: Avgshja

Reviewer: Her_Royal_Cuteness

Summary: 2/5

The summary is very long and disorganized. It introduces the main character in a manner that makes the reader itch to throw the book away. The events that the book is based on is there somewhere in the summary but it is too messy. I suggest cutting down the number of words in the summary. Whatever information that we would've eventually found out in the book should not be in the summary. The main character should be portrayed in a manner that we would be interested to see what happens next.

Although it's not in the main areas I will be touching, I would like to address the cover, if I could call it that. It was just a picture that had the title of the book slapped on it and although the picture fit the book completely it was all but intriguing. The author's name was missing and it was generally boring. I think the cover and the summary are the reasons I put off reading the book until I knew I couldn't get out of eventually opening it. Meaning if I wasn't supposed to review this book, I wouldn't have touched it, which isn't great.

Grammar: 2/5

The author tried to minimize the mistakes but they still ended up making the book choppy and, at some places, really hard to understand. Solution? Get an editor. A good one. They are actually easy to find and our very own TreasureCommunity even has an edit shop.

Character Building: 1/5

As I read through the book I became very aware of the fact that I was ill-equipped to understand it. First of all, the main character was Indian and secondly, the story was set in India. The author never took into cognizance the fact that non-Indian people could be reading the book.

Besides that I found the main character, Avipsa, rigid and unlikeable. The only thing we know about her is the fact that she likes books and is smart. I'm pretty sure there is a whole lot more to her.

Another thing I disliked about the book was the names of the characters. It seems that every new line introduces another character with a complicated name. Throughout the book I found myself struggling to remember which character had which name and even the sex if each character.

[ray_of_sunshine9 to intervene - the names aren't necessarily the problem, especially if they are traditional and are used to encapsulate the setting. However, if characters aren't being introduced at a slower pace and the reader is overwhelmed with names, they will find it difficult to remember. So, rather than changing names, consider slowing down the pace.]

Writing Style: 3/5

I feel that every writer had his or her own style of writing and while I can't fully grasp this author's style, I respect it. I like that the author kept Avipsa's thought pattern identical to a thirteen year old. What I disliked what the use of flowery and unnecessary words. 

Why say "Beholding the accustomed scene in my eyes was enough to prove that the holidays had really terminated" when you can say "seeing everyone rush around was enough reminder that the holidays were over". The big words just complicated a really simple sentence and confused all the readers. I personally had to reread that sentence three times before I understood what was trying to be passed across.

Also a feel that being a bibliophile is more that just reading books. Avipsa is always shown reading but how have these books affected her as a person? As I person that adores books I have to say that a good number of books have changed me. The Hunger Games trilogy have made me braver and cherish the little things, My Heart and other Black Holes has taught me that sometimes good things can come out of bad times and The Sun is Also a Star has made me realize the power of the 24 hours in a day and to believe that miracles can happen at any hour. In my opinion Avipsa would seem genuine if the books she read filtered into her everyday life and affected her as a person.

Plot + Originality: 1/5

On the uniqueness front, I was sad that the author didn't develop Avipsa in the manner she should've been developed. I was pretty excited to see a book about a bibliophile but Avipsa disappointed me.

For the plot, I'm not even sure where that's headed. The author stated that Avipsa had secrets and whatnot but I didn't see any signs of that.

OVERALL SCORE: 9/25

The score shouldn't discourage you. I think the story is a diamond in the rough. It just needs a lot of polishing and that's OK because not every story starts off being great. It takes revision after revision to end up with a perfect story and even at that no story is perfect. I hope this review helped, feel free to PM me at Her_Royal_Cuteness for any clarifications, advice or even editing tips. I don't bite, I promise. Tell a friend to tell a friend about this community and keep writing!