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| tuesday november 16 8:03 AM |
"i don't know we kind of just kissed, but it was barely a second i pulled away fast." i say, partially embarrassed. he's probably just laughing it off with his friends tight now while i'm over here with mine over reacting about the whole thing. that was my first somewhat real kiss, unless you count the spin the bottle kiss with blake rider back in third grade. "i can't believe you actually took my advice though" nia gasps, laughing about the whole situation. "this is not funny. i have to see him in third period and we have plans after his practice." i whine looking around the hallway to see if he's anywhere near the three of us. "dude you're fine, just take a deep breath and don't over think it more than you already have." nia says causing me to furrow my eyebrows and let out a laugh at how she called me dude. she catches on and covers her mouth with her hands. "oh no. i'm becoming a mini tre" she gasps.
"that's cute" chris smiles widely, we were still slightly taken back at how the word dude came out of her mouth. she never uses words like that, no matter how many times chris and i do she never let it come out of her mouth. thank you tre, we needed that.
"listen how about we just walk to first period, taking deep breaths the whole time." chris suggests earning a nod from me. i guess that would help some, and the bell is supposed to ring soon so we really should get going. "have fun tre" chris teases nia making her smile. "haha, bye guys"
the past few classes all i could think about was jack and the event from yesterday. we really kissed on an accident. i should be jumping for joy right now, he's been my crush since freshman year. sadly, i'm doing everything but that. i'm over thinking and just have this overwhelming feeling that i may have just messed everything up between us because i tried to kiss his cheek. i can't help but wonder why he leaned in and kissed me. was it because he wanted to? because he felt bad and didn't want me to completely embarrass myself? or was he just bored and hasn't had one in a while? i seriously doubt its the last one, he probably has girls kissing him all the time...he has them wrapped around his finger and you can tell by how every girl looks at him.
"hey" jack says, taking a seat in front of me making me remove myself from my deep train of thoughts. "hey" i force a smile, trying to seem as normal and as less awkward as i can. "look yesterday was my fault and i'm sorry...im still down to hang out today but that's only if you want to. and don't feel like you're obligated to hang out because i understand if you don't want to." he chuckles nervously making my insides form a knot.
he still wants to hang out with me today? i figured he would have cancelled and ghosted me. "really?" i ask confused as to why he'd still want to hang out with me. "yeah? why?" he laughs nervously again. "nothing, i just didn't know if we'd still be cool after that." i shrug making him actually laugh, it didn't sound nervous this time. "what the hell, noooo. we're still cool. i promise." he tells me as he holds a wide smile. "okay, then yes i'm still down to hang out...six right?" i ask him, trying to act even more normal. "yes six sounds great."
