Ghosts ✔

088 • Kip

Kip saw her standing in the doorway, her arms wrapped around herself. Although she was trying to show a brave face, he sensed that she was close to falling apart. His eyes shot to Happy, but he didn't look like the comforting type of man, and Kozik was busy trying to calm down his old lady who wasn't used to violence like this. 

Should he go to her?

He couldn't think of a good reason not to go to her. After all, she was the mother of his son and they had been close friends before Maddox had fucked with his brain. Shaking off the awkwardness he walked to the door. In silence he enveloped his arms around her, pulling her close. Her whole body was shaking when she leaned into him. 

"Oh sweetheart..." he whispered, feeling defeated because of her sadness. At loss of words he pressed a kiss into her hair, softly rocking her in his arms. Her arms glided around his waist too; her grasp felt desperate, like he was a life preserver she was clinging to. 

Knowing nobody wanted to be in the center of things when crying, he led her towards the bedrooms. Since Casper was sleeping in his bed, he took her to the far corner of the building, to the fire stairs leading to the roof. Nobody ever came there; Jax had shown him the place a while ago, when the noise of the clubhouse had been too much for him right after his return.

Once they were on the roof, he sat down on the ground and pulled her between his legs. Protectively he wrapped his arms around her, as if Juice could show up any moment to curse her again. Now they were away from the others, she started to sob quietly. Not knowing what to do about it, he just hold her tight, burying his face in her blonde locks. Guilt was gnawing at his heart because he enjoyed holding her a little too much; for the first time since a very long time he had the feeling he was doing something natural, something his old self would have done too. 

After a while she stopped crying and wiped her eyes. 

"If you need to get anything off your chest... then I'm here to listen to you Dane."

She turned a little more towards him to see his face, giving him a little smile. "Like the old times." She took a moment to study his face. "You've barely changed, Kip. The same warmth is radiating from you." She took his hand when he lowered his arms. "Our hearts could have grown cold too, just like Juice's. We've been through enough horrible things to be traumatized forever. But we had each other, we were never alone. But he... he had no one who truly understood his pain. And the only one who was able to offer him a bit of comfort, was even working for Maddox." Her eyes were glassy, the tears lying in wait. "When I came to the clubhouse, that first time I escaped, I knew Maddox would kill a new love. All that time I was terrified that he would murder Juice. And now – now I wonder if this is the reason he kept Juice alive. Because this – this is worse than death. I mean – if he never finds back his old self. He's so hurt, so twisted up inside." Tears started to slip down her cheeks again. "I feel so selfish. I should have kept him at bay, I never should have come here in the first place, then..."

Kip cupped her jaw with his hand. "You can't stop love, Dana. Just like every other human being you need it – it's what makes us human. The guys told me that Happy knew from the start what type of man Maddox was and it has been our own call to protect you." Softly, he caressed her skin with his thumb. As small as the touch was; he could feel tinglings spread through his whole body. "I don't care what I've gone through. I just feel it was worth the suffering now you're back – and despite all the horrible things, Maddox gave us something beautiful too; Casper."

Leaning into his palm with her cheek she closed her eyes, as if she needed to think about these words. When she opened them again, she searched for his eyes. 

Suddenly the longing rose to kiss her. Ashamed he bent his head, trying to ignore the dashing feeling in his stomach. Dana moved between his legs and a moment later he felt two fingers under his chin, lifting his face. The look in her blue eyes was different, as if the sadness had faded a bit. Her thumb stroked the hairs on his jaw.

He shivered when her thumb rested on his lip. Hesitating he pouted his lips a bit, giving her small kisses. Her other hand glided across his neck, pulling him a little closer. She took away her thumb from his mouth and replaced it by her lips. 

With the greatest difficulty he pulled back his face. He didn't dare to look at her. "We – we can't do this to Juice."

"All he can feel now, is hate. Whether we kiss or not." He felt the pressure of her forehead against his, her fingers wandering down the side of his face. "I love him and I want him to be happy. But he isn't the only one who has suffered, who needs comfort. Who needs love."

Her words made him loss for words. Somehow it felt ridiculous that he cared about the feelings of the man who had hurt the girl he was trying to comfort.  Pushing away the guilt, he surrendered to the roaring and gurgling inside him; a warmness he hadn't felt since he had returned to Charming. His longing led him to her lips and he cupped her face as he kissed her.

The heat in his body flared up as her tongue slid between his lips, slowly swirling around his. Slowly his thoughts stilled; the girl who was with him was the only thing he was aware of. Vaguely he noticed how he laid down on the ground and pulled her on top of him, his hand buried in her hair while her tongue tenderly played with his, alternated with small kisses.

In a flash he saw her smiling face, a hand gliding across a pale breast, a nipple between his lips. He felt her bare skin underneath his, her lips exploring his neck, nails digging into his shoulders. His own lips were tingling as they descended down her neck, following her collar bone until he kissed the little birthmark underneath it.

In shock he sat up straight, staring bewildered at her. 

Dana looked insecure. "Sorry," she whispered. "Maybe... maybe you weren't ready for this."

"No," he said, a lump in his throat. "It's not that. I saw things, I felt things... Like a lifelike fantasy. But I – I don't think it was a fantasy." His hand was trembling als he moved his hand to the neck of her shirt, pulling it down a little. Stunned, he stared at the small birthmark below her collarbone. "It were memories."