"you're starting school tomorrow. get some sleep" sarah said.
"okay" i yawned and got up.
"night" she hugged me then i headed to my room. brendon was in his room talking on the phone.
"it means a lot to me that you wanna do that for her. yeah! you're literally family! of course!" he noticed me in the doorway. "shes here now. get some sleep. okay bye." he ended the call.
"you going to bed?" he asked. i nodded. "school" i sighed. he sidled up to me and gave me a big hug.
lyou mean the world to me. even if i say i love you its not enough" he mumbled. "i love you though" he kissed my head and released.
"love you too"
i awoke the next morning to my alarm. i shut it off and fell off my bed. i sighed. whats the point? i got off the floor and went into the bathroom. i got ready into a white dan and phil t shirt, black flared trousers, black fishnet tights, black converse and a black long flare cardigan. i then did my make up and styled my hair.
i headed downstairs and brendon was singing and making breakfast. he saw me and smiled. "you look so beautiful" he gave me a hug then i sat down. "nervous?" he asked.
"no" i said honestly. this was my third fresh start.
"i am" he sat down and gave me a plate. he had one too.
"why?" i asked.
"cuz i love you and want you to be okay"
"i like it when you say that"
"say what?"
"when you say you love me
"whys that?" he chewed his eggs.
"its reassuring. wheres sarah?" i asked timidly.
"yoga. then work" he responded as he poured us both some coffee.
"so what are you doing today?"
"nothing. im bored" he sighed.
"i'll stay home and keep you company!"
"yeah nice try" he chuckled.
"worth a shot" i said sadly.
"don't be sad. we can hang out after school" he put his arm round me.
"okay" i agreed. we put our dishes away and i went to get my bag. after that i put my shoes on and we headed out. brendon turned the radio on and we listened to some music on the way. we got there and brendon turned the music down and looked at me.
"i can walk you in. i dont give a fuck about the attention" he said.
"im good. but thanks"
he leaned over and hugged me. "call me if you need me. i love you so so much" he said kindly. "i love you more" i replied. he kissed my head and let me go.
"you're awesome. dont fucking forget that" he drove off smiling. i scoffed at how goofy he was.
YOU ARE READING
high hopes | brendon urie
Fanfiction"if i killed myself tonight, the stars would still appear, the sun would still come out, the earth would still rotate, the seasons would still change, so why not brendon?" tw mental health, sexual assault, self harm, suicide attempts, homophobia
