Haven Harbour: Beyond the Sea • a.i. • (Sequel to Haven Harbour)

Chapter 182

The next morning I was awoken at 3 in the morning by Brooklyn who was hungry, and as I walked around the kitchen feeding him my mind travelled to what Ashton and I had talked about the night before.

Having another kid so soon after I had Brooklyn was a lot to take in. Ashton was going on tour soon, there was no where to put another child, I didn't know if we could physically and mentally have another baby right now.

I was so deep in thought that I couldn't go back to sleep and brought Brooklyn over to the sofa with me, curling up and snuggling him to me.

I was so in love with Brooklyn. He was my son and he had changed my life completely for the better. I was going to get to love him for the rest of my life and he was mine forever.

Being an actual mother was the most amazing thing and I couldn't imagine my life now without him.

I didn't notice Ashton walking into the living room until he sat down next to me, his leg touching mine.

"What are you thinking?" He asked me softly and I spoke not moving my eyes from Brooklyn's face.

"I don't know if we are ready to have another baby."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because, you're going to go on tour soon, there's no where to put another baby, there's  a lot of things that go along with it and I don't know if we can do it."

"Well, why don't before we make any final decisions we go talk to your doctor to see if we can. And if we can then we will discuss it further until we figure out what to do for us, and if not then we will wait until we can have another child."

I didn't reply.

"Carter if you're not ready then we won't do this. I was just talking last night, I don't want to pressure or rush you into having another baby with me if you're not ready."

I took in a deep breath and slowly exhaled it.

"I'm just scared."

"Why are you scared?"

"Because I know that if I get pregnant again then in a few weeks you're going to leave for tour and you're going to be gone. I'm going to be alone with our baby and another one on the way and I don't know if I'm strong enough to handle that."

"Carter you are the strongest person I know, I have all the faith in the world that you can take care of Brooklyn when I'm not here."

"I don't know how to do this without you." I whispered and I felt his arms go around my shoulders.

"Hey, it's okay." He said into my hair. "You're going to be just fine. We're going to be just fine. You, Brooklyn, Gracie and Ender are going to be just fine."

I sucked in a staggered breath.

"Why don't you take that spa day today? You're stressed and I think you need to take some time to relax and think."

"Okay." I sniffled.

"Okay." He squeezed my shoulders.

The rest of that morning was spent getting the kids ready for school and dropping them off, Ashton then driving me to the spa a few blocks away.

He came around to open my door and then got my bag out of the floor board.

"Alright. Call me when you're ready to be picked up and I'll come get you. Don't worry about anything today okay, I just want you to have a day to yourself and relax."

I nodded.

"Come here." He pulled me into his arms to give me a hug.

"Please don't look so sad." He said as he tightened his hold around my waist.