Chapter Fifty-One

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Dennise Michelle Lazaro

I stared at the hallway in amusement. It was deserted, quiet and cold. I didn't make any friends yet, I chose to be alone for the min time. It's not like people in college are not friendly, they're not just my type. I have my own world and so they do.

University is way harder than I expected... In terms of academics.

"When you get in University, you'll realize that being in a relationship is a distraction."

Dad's words rung inside my head. I clenched my fist as I walked along the hallways, I hugged my books as a cold yet familiar wind passed swished by me. I've been feeling strange lately. The feelings were too different, compared to every time Alyssa Dan's around or close. It smelled trouble.

My forehead creased as I tried brushing off the feelings and the trouble that caused by my dad's words in my head. It's not that my relationship with Alyssa was a distraction or will pushed me down in some ways. I could separate them both, I will try.

I know what's their difference, passing through University is my first priority, and there's Alyssa Dan, my fourth. I didn't know how I did my list but Alyssa agreed with it, though I had doubt that she's only saying yes because she doesn't want to hurt me.

Am I being selfish?

I stared at myself when I get in the washroom. There was a miserable pout on my dry lips, I forced a smile but my eyes were telling me the opposite.

I missed her, I really do. Leaving her alone was not a good idea, I think, I did the wrong decision for doing that.

Am I the one who's doing the wrong choices though? Or she's the one who's not trying to make something out of it?

My phone vibrated in my coat's pocket. I stared at it for a second before picking it up. A text from Alyssa Dan.

From: Babe 💕
... I could feel your lips forming a pout, and so mine. Iloveyou! ...

Strange isn't it? I don't know if it's just a quote or a thought that came from her mind, but then... There's was that small beat from my heart telling me that Alyssa could really feel me.

To: Babe 💕
I am, smiling... :).

From: Babe 💕
Can we meet up?

I shook my head. The reason why Alyssa's not trying to do something out of my unreasonable causes was because...

To: Babe 💕
I'll be the one to tell you when. Not just today. Im sorry.

Im figuring something else that's out of our relationship. I know she's my girlfriend, I could trust her, I love her, but... I think Im on my own for now.

I stared back at the mirror and jerked on my spot when a face popped out in front of me. I looked at her with confusion.

"Alyssa..." I whispered before running my finger tips on the mirror.

She leaned closer, moved her face to her right side as if checking something on her cheeks. I blinked twice, realizing that she's at the other side of the room. Weird mirror, isn't it? You could see everybody else at the other side but they couldn't see you.

That's the reason why I don't like to see her yet. She's been hiding things from me, and I don't know why she's not telling me what's happening with her life. It scares me, that I started to hide my feelings from her too.

I sighed. I walked out of the washroom and breathed in as I tried to stop the tears in my eyes. Damn tears, it makes me look immature.

Chemistry class was not helping me neither.

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