Sex?

Chapter 97

My face self-consciously reacts to the song and my head begins to bob side to side and my lips pout.

I reach for the toothbrush and my lips pucker. Bending over to spit, my butt shakes.

Once I catch my natural reaction to the song, I laugh at myself- enjoying myself.

Enjoying my company.

I stare at myself in the mirror, tracing my face, observing the toothbrush stuck in my mouth, toothpaste dripping like foam.

And yet, I continue to dance confidently.

My dry eyes awaken with the sound of my voice as I use the toothbrush as a microphone. I begin to spin, one arm up, finger pointing up and the other holding onto the mic.

The song begins to close, yet I hear it still in my head, feeling the singer's voice vibrate in my own. My body can't help but follow the rhythm and my body reacts perfectly and naturally. I can't help but smile.

I catch my gaze in the mirror and I can't help but blush.

Wow, what an unexpected reaction.

I don't dwell on it too long and spit into the sink.

Gurgling water for a few seconds and another spit repeats.

I open the mirror and place my toothbrush horizontally in its slot.

Splashing my face with water, the corners of my eyes feel lighter. I feel refreshed.

I gather my pajamas, begin to walk out, but then I look at myself in the mirror one more time.

I feel solid. I feel like water.

I feel hopeful.

But there's something heavy in my chest.

But, I don't dwell on it.

I smile lightly, it reaches my eyes and I close the door.

The song has changed and I hear it echo through the carpeted hallway. It's a softer song, calmer, rumbling like the ocean. Melancholy even, but relaxing, as if my playlist knew the shift of my contentment.

The light from my room comes in the hallway, and I know now that the warm sun minutes before has also shifted- into a glowing gray. It makes sense, it's March.

But, never lose hope, maybe the sun will choose to pop out of the clouds.

With the door creaked open, I push it with my free hand.

The door obeys and it moves slowly, just like me as I adjust the soft pajamas rubbing against my arm.

Everything feels so smooth, my breath flows the movements together. And when I look up, indeed the sun from before is now a gray sky. The curtains are now fully open, and the space feels bigger. They weren't open before.

My heartbeat quickens when my gaze lands on my mom. My eyes widen and I step back.

She seems to have noticed me and looks away from her work on the bed and stares at me.

Was she making the bed?

There's a moment of confused silence. She's still bent over, her hands have stopped rubbing the sheets, but I can see that's what she was doing before.

I take in her appearance, her hair in a high messy bun, her blue eyes cautious, waiting for my next move.

The 'oohs' of the background bring me back to the state I was in before and I shake out of my mesmerized surprise.

I step inside the room, circling the opposite side of the bed. Thank goodness my phone was placed on the right. I lower the volume of the song, the oohs soften, barely audible.