My Girl; A dark romance

Seven

*Travis's p.o.v*
She was giving me the cold shoulder.
I didn't mean to make her cry, she was already emotional when to came into my office and I wasn't good with dealing with emotions like that.

I had slept with Hannah twice, she had started working there and in a horny state of mind, we fucked and it was good so we did it again and then she had met a guy and the sex stopped, it was pretty simple and there was no feelings there. Not like that.

Not like Lily.

That girl was something else. She enraged me, in the best way. I wanted to strangle her and kiss her at the same time.

She was a little pocket of energy that I wasn't use to but now I was seeing a side of her that was sad and cold. It was my fault.

But i couldn't change the way I was, I didn't like affection, it wasn't something I grew up with and now I was fighting a battle with this tiny blonde woman who wanted all the affection that I wasn't capable of giving.

I was cold, calculated and very protective.

Lily was the kind of girl I wanted to protect.

And she hit me with the statement of me being her first and I felt this pang in my heart because I could hear the pain in her voice.

I didn't know what she expected of me, I didn't know what the fuck was happening between us, there was this invisible connection that made me want her with me. Maybe it was just lust. I didn't know.

Currently, I was out in the main area of the bar. I was sipping on some whiskey in the doorway, my eyes all over Lily.

She looked tired, completely drained.

When she came to drop off empty glasses at the bar, I touched her upper arm.

"Can we talk?" I whispered in her ear

"I'm busy" Lily said

"It will only be 5 minutes. Jess can cover you"

She put the glasses down and walked down the hall. I followed her into my office.

"Last night you said-"

"This isn't work related?" Lily asked

"What? No, I don't give a fuck about the work"

"Alright"

Lily went to leave but I grabbed her hips

"Lily" I said firmly

"My personal life isn't any of your business so if you don't want to talk about work then you have no reason to talk to me"

"When you started kissing me, I become apart of your personal life so we need to discuss what you were going on about last night"

"We're not kissing anymore so there isn't anything to say"

"Lily you're doing my head in"

"I'll happily leave then if you don't mind letting go of my hips"

"Are you a virgin?" I asked

"That has nothing to do with you" she whispered

"That's why you got so upset with me and why you said things would be complicated. You haven't been fucked before have you?"

Her eyes filled to the brim with tears.

"Leave me alone" she blinked so they would fall

"You could of told me"

"Can I please leave?"

"I don't want any of this animosity between us"

"Everything is fine"

"But it's not. You're upset, I don't know how to make it better. I don't know anything Lily, you came here and suddenly I can't even think about anything without my mind going to you, I'm trying to do work and yet I'm checking the cameras to make sure you're okay and all that goes through my head at night is you, it's always you. Why is that?"

"I don't know"

"You don't know?"

"I don't know because it's the same for me and I've never felt like this before, my feelings are just as confusing Travis, I hate how much anxiety I get around you, I hate knowing that you've been with someone else, it makes me so damn angry that it's frustrating. You wouldn't understand what's it like to be me in this situation because you can go off and have sex with anyone you want to but it's so much more significant to me and I want to let go so badly but I can't and I can't do it with someone like you, I need someone to hold me and talk me through it and you're just not that guy. I don't expect you to change but it breaks my heart to have so many feelings for someone I barely know but want to know but can't know because I need things you can't give me"

There was a knock on my office door and Lily turned away from me. Wiping her tears and taking deep breaths.

I opened my door. Marcus and Jackson was standing there. I forgot they were coming to report to me.

"One minute" I said closing the door.

I walked over to Lily. I gently rubbed her back

"I don't know what you want to do from here" I said

"Well I'm not quitting. I need this job"

"I wasn't suggesting that"

Lily turned around to me and her eyes were so red, she looked so sad.

"You just stay my boss and we only talk if it's for work reasons" she said tearing up.

"Okay. You can come and talk to me if you need me though for anything"

"Alright"

I gently cupped her cheek and lifted her head so she would look at me but it just made her cry more. I felt so guilty because I wanted to comfort her but I didn't know how.

"I'm sorry" I said

Lily walked to the door and left.

I balled my fists at my sides and let Marcus and Jackson in.

I sat at my desk and I was listening to what they were saying but my mind was so on Lily. I hated how upset she was.

And yet I thought about our conversation and how we both had strong feelings that were confusing and just didn't make sense since we barely knew each other.

The idea of her finding someone else made me so angry.

I hated this.