shattered soul [teen wolf]

[chapter eighty eight] rebirth and battle scars

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Aires pov...

Everything would be so much easier if I was actually dead.

It was a thought I didn't want to have but one I had regardless. I didn't want pity, I was stating a fact. Everything had gotten so complicated.

Something had happened in the clinic, and everyone was hesitant to tell me what. According to Deaton, I had given them information he already knew. However, there was no mistaking the haunted look in his eyes. Something else had happened.

"You don't have to do it again, love." Blake suddenly said, bringing me out of my thoughts. "Screw whatever they want, they can all go fuck themselves."

A hint of a smirk ghosted across my lips as I cocked my head to glance at him. We were standing outside the clinic, I was leaning against my car whilst Blake leant against his bike. He was looking at me and I was looking at him, and in that moment, looking at him, I had forgotten about the disaster that had happened inside the clinic moments before.

But slowly, my smirk fell as I glanced at the scars on his neck, the scars that were covered by his tattoos but were still there. "Is that place still in your mind?" I asked in a low mutter.

"Yes. But I'm not in it anymore in my mind." He murmured, making me scrunch up my face as I narrowed my eyes.

"What do you mean?"

"Being in Eichen House- you're stuck in it, it's in your mind, the feeling of you in it, it's burned in- scarred. Even when you leave Eichen House, your mind is stuck in the same feeling as when you were in Eichen House. You're out of it physically but mentally you're still there. Right now, I'm not mentally there anymore. It's just the memories that haunt me-"

"How do you get out of it?" I quickly blurted out. "Mentally?"

I was stuck inside those four walls, stuck in the never ending loop of panic that Eichen House wretched out of me, a constant state of paranoia. My body was still stuck in fight or flight mode, still searching for danger.

"You've gotten yourself twice out of it before, how?"

"I don't think I've ever left it." I admitted in a whisper.

I had been stuck in Eichen House mentally since I was eight years old.

"You've got to kill it all, every reminder of the place, all the things that trigger memories."

Glancing up to meet his gaze, I gave Blake a knowing look before saying, "I'm a reminder to you though." I pointed out.

I barely remembered Blake from when I was a child, he remembered me though. If his logic was to get rid of all reminders, and if he had mentally gotten out of that place, why was I still around?

"That's different." He whispered before walking around his bike and standing in front of me. "What is it that scares you most about the place?"

"The people within it." I shot back without missing a beat.

"The ghosts."

"They aren't all ghosts."

Even though Blake burned Eichen House down to the ground, some people still got out, most of the people from the closed unit got out. There were still monsters lurking in the shadows.

A frown twisted on Blake's face before a smirk took its place. "You're right." He hummed.

"What?" I asked whilst questioning the look on his face, the look that usually meant trouble.