The life of Jessica Stark (Bucky x OC)

Chapter 40

*** I am so sorry about how late this chapter is. I know a few months ago I said soon and here we are but in all honestly I hit a road block with this book and I hated myself for a while when I had the perfect opportunity to finish the book, quit whilst I was ahead but I carried on and I did regret the decision. However!! With that being said I have written more of Jessica's story for your lovely faces because I didn't want to leave you high and dry! (And because I noticed a lot of you were saving this book to 'read but stopped updating' reading lists and it was making me sad. Anyway, enough from me, I hope you enjoy with chapter that I speed wrote in one night!***

He could've broken the door down, Bucky knew that. All it would take is one little punch or kick and he'd be with her, holding her, comforting her, apologising on his knees. But he doesn't. Instead, he continues to bang and plead until he realises his efforts are futile and he stops. He stops and he backs away from the door slowly, pausing for a moment before stepping towards it again

"Jessica, I'm sorry... I didn't mean that at all. Of course I don't think you'd use me like that, I just didn't want to you to regret anything" He places his forehead on the door and takes a deep breath "I-i've been where you are Jess, I've used and been used before a-and I don't care about me, use me if you want but not if it's going to hurt you-"

The door flies open before he can finish his sentence

"Don't you dare say that!" Jessica fumes "Don't you dare stand there and say this shit to me James when you know full well I can literally read your mind and feel your emotions... which yes was wrong of me but I'm glad I did because I'd keep going about my day thinking everything is ok"

"It is!"

"No it's NOT!" In that second all the furniture is engulfed in a cloud of yellow as it lifts off the floor

"Jess..." Bucky says cautiously as he takes a step back from her "You need to take a deep breath ok"

"God, why does everyone think it's ok to lie to me?! Is it me? Am I so bad?!"

"It's not you-"

"CLEARLY... you had me thinking I was like my dad" Her voice wavers slightly on the last word, her angered expression matches Bucky's pained one

"Can you please put the furniture down?" He asks calmly making her look around the room, her eyes widening in realisation. She eventually drops the furniture down, taking a careful step back "Doll..." Bucky whispers, not moving from his spot but his eyes fully focused on hers "You have been through so much in such a short amount of time and it's understandable that you're questioning everything but I need you to understand what I'm saying here" He takes one careful step towards her 

"Please don't Buck, I don't want you to get hurt-"

"You could never hurt me Jess" He interrupts quickly 

"It doesn't matter that you're a super soldier-"

"Who said anything about that? You can't hurt me Jessica because I love you, you can't hurt me because I know you would never mean it... the only way you could ever hurt me is if you tell me you don't love me anymore"

"Bucky-" 

"You can hurt me, use me, break my heart,  you can shatter it into a million pieces and I'd still ask if you were ok..." Tears fill both of their eyes, threatening to spill over "I'm not going to gaslight you when you read my mind and emotions, I didn't think you were ready and I still don't. I made a lot of bad decisions about myself before I was ready to and I don't want you to live with the same regret that I do because you're too pure for that, for me and I want to keep it that way... It's selfish I know but it's the truth"