Super Dragon Ball: Paradise Hysteria

Why Do Android Babies Cry?

"Alright, I'm putting you behind bars to think about what you were about to do," Obotchaman clenched his knuckles by his sides while Trunks adopted a fighting pose of his own.

"Are you really going to fight someone that's as strong as Arale right now?" Videl questioned Trunks' unwavering resolution to challenge Obotchaman head-on.

"My dad does it all the time!" Trunks stated with a serious face, looking almost devoted enough to even make the first move. The two threw themselves at one another at the same time. Obotchaman just let himself loose, running at Trunks with his arms bent to the sides while Trunks turned sideways and flew toward Obotchaman with an elbow turned at his opponent.

A noticeable buzzing noise interrupted both of their attacks. Trunks and Obotchaman both stopped and turned toward the sound of a buzzing engine, only to see a petite young woman on a scooter with a short haircut that made her head appear as if it was shaped like a mushroom, wearing a flashy red dress decorated with plenty of frills and a pair of shades. The young woman had two bow ties tied to both sides of her head.

"You hicks!" the young woman yelled out. She drove into the middle of the fight, separating Obotchaman and Trunks by rolling up between them on her scooter and making a sharp, shrieking turn that raised some dust into the air. "I hope you're glad because you've just ruined my day. That poor kid should be taken away from his parents because letting them out in that outfit is child abuse."

Trunks blinked a few times before pointing to himself with a questioning grimace on his long face. Videl scratched her head in befuddlement, though Obotchaman seemed to know this scooter-riding, undergrown young woman as he softened his expression and approached her to calm her down.

"You, seeing those ridiculous suspenders of yours, makes me wonder how I could've ever had a crush on you. That must've just been my compulsion to fix people and my penchant for kindness. You should have your kid taken away too because no one should be subjected to seeing their father ridicule himself by wearing suspenders this year. Newsflash, loafers-boy, you graduated from school almost a decade ago now. It's okay to let go of the schoolboy look already," the ruthless fashion commentator kept ripping on Obotchaman, who just looked down and drilled the tip of his black loafers into the ground, poking his fingers in embarrassment.

"Kinoko-san..." Obotchaman mumbled, trying to speak up through his shame, but his voice came out soft and he jumbled his words.

"What is going on here, exactly?" Videl squinted.

"Oh, God!" Kinoko clapped her hands and turned her scooter, raising another wall of dust to smack Videl and Trunks right in the face and cause grievous coughing from the irritation. "I was hoping you would just stay quiet. Given how poor and homeless you look, I was willing to just be the better woman and just leave you alone to pick your nose and scratch your bum in the cardboard box, missy, but you just had to open your rotten cheese-smelling trapper and burp, didn't you?"

Videl's mouth stretched across her face as she blew into her open hand, trying to catch a whiff of her breath since she could've sworn it didn't smell bad at all. Even on the road she maintained proper hygiene and insisted that Trunks did too.

"Well, I hope you know you embody poorness. You dress like you want to shout at the world you're willing to fight and kill for a pair of sneakers. In your case, slipping on a literal trash bag for a dress would be an improvement, honey," the ruthless fashion commentator went on. "Now that all of you know you are a grave disappointment and an embarrassment to your mothers. You are no better than apes. Now that my job here is done. I bid you all adieu!"

After saying her piece, Kuroko Sarada kicked her scooter up into high gear and bolted off over the nearest hill. An uncomfortable silence reigned with all the previous fighting spirit from the atmosphere. As if things couldn't get any worse. A shrill mix between an emergency alarm and the cry of a human child began raising the roof off of Obotchaman and Arale's house. Obotchaman jumped up, startled, and rushed inside.