Ghost

Epilogue

    You know that in between when you're first getting up in the morning? Like when you know you're awake but if you just close your eyes you could be pulled back under and if you open your eyes it becomes real and you have to face the day?

     Yeah that's where I like to spend some extra time, too. Just a few minutes to gather my thoughts before I'm brought into reality.

     Usually Natasha wakes me up once she realizes this is what I'm doing. I don't mind, though. It's usually so we can just snuggle or she can see me before she leaves.

     It's almost like a morning routine for us. Not that I mind getting up early or anything, but sometimes I need to be brought out of my day dreams and into my actual dream life with Natasha. Sometimes it's hard to believe it's all real.

    What I'm saying all this for is that it's really damn strange Natasha hasn't woken me up yet. I feel like I've been like this for at least half an hour. It's entirely possible my sense of time is off, it's easily done when you're crossing between sleep and reality. Maybe she already left?

     Screw it. I'll just get up anyway. She could be with Ally Bear or making breakfast. Our routine has changed a little bit since our new tiny edition, obviously.

      And the thought of seeing our daughter spitting out some puréed squash as Nat tries to feed it to her has me smiling and ready to get up. I love the mornings with her; she's always so smiley and giggly. And she loves to cuddle.

     Who am I kidding? She's like that all of the time. She's amazing, they both are, and I can't wait to see my girls.

     As I finally peel my eyes open, I'm met with blue sky? The fuck? I close my eyes and open them again a few more times but the result is all the same; I'm looking up at the sky. A very blue, cloudless sky.

     I do not remember falling asleep outside. I don't remember drinking last night.. I will probably be in some deep shit for this.

     Well I might as well get back inside. I stretch my poor stiff limbs.. that aren't stiff? I actually feel totally refreshed. Like I just had the best nights sleep ever and I could run a marathon. Ew, not that I would.

     This must people why people drink coffee. For this feeling. Because you feel energized once you've had coffee, right?

     But there's no way I'm outside? I've slept outside before. This is not how I wake up. I'm usually highly uncomfortable and slightly damp from the dew. And with a headache. I finally sit up to see that I'm sitting on clouds? How the fuck does this keep getting weirder?

     I do check to make sure I'm all in one piece at least. And clothed. So the panic I had that Nat wasn't with me and I might be naked, passes. But then it dawns on me;

     Oh shit. I'm tripping right now, aren't I? Oh Natasha is going to kill me. But to be fair I had no idea I even took something or what it was I took. So she can't be that mad, right? Right?

     Well, might as well ride out this high. I stand up to start exploring, although I'm sure I must be at the compound or something. This is just the dreamland my mind has created. Though I would have thought Natasha and Alia would be here in some aspect.

    They usually take up all of my dreams. But I'm not complaining, we're usually in the treehouse I built or running around the house with another bundle of joy with us.

     Now I've been walking around for what feels like hours. It's all endless clouds and blue sky. Clouds under my feet and blue above. I wish this trip was a little more interesting. It's also lasting a really long ass time. I would have thought it'd wear off by now.