ok... i swear i'm not abusive, am i? no, but am i? like i love her and want her to myself, but i'm not gonna do anything to sabotage her social life, i'm not gonna approach her irl, i will never, NEVER!, hurt her, i'd rather slit my wrist then cause her harm.
like yh i know i'm a creep, but i only wish her the best, i just don't have any friends so i don't want to lose her, and i know "i'll change" is what abusers say, but if i don't fulfill my end i'm out i really mean it no ifs ands or buts (it scares me to think that i wont fulfill my end, i believe i will atm, but will i?)
controlling, yh, but i don't actively try to separate her from her friends no matter how much i desire her to myself.
also suicidal thoughts, they're not related to her, they've always been here and will most likely remain no matter what, so not related to her and i don't want her to think they are.
i feel like i have abusive tendencies but i don't act upon those tendencies.
no matter what i am loyal to her and her alone.
and i swear if anyone ever fucking harms her, no matter how long it's been since we've spoke, i will beat the ever loving shit out of them ^^ she means more to me than anything
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versions 1.3-1.6 (Diary 1) [ARCHIVED]
Non-Fictionmoved to my new diary where hopefully i'll be less of a whiny bit- i mean where hopefully i'll be more mature for her time moves on, whilst my life is in a state of constant transit i'll just be refering to myself as L, i am currently on my final ye...
![versions 1.3-1.6 (Diary 1) [ARCHIVED]](https://img.wattpad.com/cover/291103081-64-k372270.jpg)