versions 1.3-1.6 (Diary 1) [ARCHIVED]

ambiguous wording

this doesn't have a title because for once i'm not overwhelmed by my emotions like a fucking child who has a meltdown every other day.

ok so the title, just a little something that's bugging me in this moment, t who has officially rejected said something along the lines of "i can't feel the same way" now i know she doesn't and will likely won't ever feel the same way, but... "can't" isn't don't, "can't" means something is preventing you, is it too much to ask for a "no", or an "i don't feel the same way", like that's all i want. i would ask her to say that she doesn't feel the same way and get a concrete answer but how the feck do u ask that. look i know she doesn't love me, and that's totally fine, but there's a part of me still holding out because it just wants to keep the fantasy of me and her alive and it conflicts with the part of me that's obsessed with reason and logic. well it's whatever i can't ask someone to reject me that'd be super awkward.

anyways imma try and sleep a little cause it's 12:54am where i live and i am tired as fuuuuuuuuck, goodnight :3