Dear Diary | Chacha

My person

                     ~Chapter 26~
MY PERSON

Chases POV:
I continued to kiss the girl until she stopped- and I had just realized what I said-

Oh my god-
I did not just say Charli?? I didn't say it! I said it. I fucking said Charli. God dammit! This is so awkward?!
I didn't think she was Charli, Charli was just in my mind because I was trying to move on from Charli! I wanted to lose my virginity. I was tired of waiting for someone I love because I knew I'd never get that.

I sorta just proved my own point. Il never get love. Why can't I be normal? Like everyone else? Why do I have to be in love with someone.

Chase: "Chanel. I meant Chanel I'm sorry!"

She quickly got off of me

Chase: "no I'm sorry! I was just thinking of Charli!"
Chanel: "wait a second?! Isn't Charli your sister?!"

Ew no?!-
Oh. She thinks that. Right.

Chase: "I was thinking about her, not in that way??"
Chanel: "why were you thinking about your sister while we were making out?! Ew you incest freak?!"

What have I gotten myself into.

Chase: "I'm not an incest freak I promise! She was just in my head at the time-"

She walked out of the room

Chanel: "don't call me"

She quickly ran away

I laid back on my bed and put my hands on my face

What is wrong with me.

This is the worst date ever. How could this possibly get any worse?

The closet door opened only to reveal Charli and that's when I wanted to jump off a building.

She heard- all of it- all that?? She heard me moan her name while I was making out with someone else?! I'm screwed. Im no better then Justin at this point.

Uhhh! I might as well die right now

She sat down next to me

Chase: "I swear, I was just thinking of you at the time. Im not weird, I wasn't pretending she was you or anything"

Not pretending but wishing.

This is so awkward.

Charli: "why exactly were you thinking of me during- that-"

Because I love you and I wanted her so badly to be you.

I shrugged

Chase: "I was wondering where you were because I thought I saw you go into my room earlier"

She nodded

Chase: "I'm sorry if that's as weird. But I swear it was an accident"

She laughed

Charli: "it's alright Chase. It was funny... plus I'm kinda glad it happened. I really didn't wanna see you guys have sex"

I laughed

Chase: "probably wasn't gonna go through with it anyway"

I always chicken out in some way. Self sabotage.

Charli: "oh right, you're a virgin? Right?"

How did she know that-

Chase: "um... yeah... who told you that?"

She probably thinks I'm a total loser now.

Charli: "Justin did."

Of course he did.