Hey, I missed my baby Ethan so this chapter we bring him back.
Also sorry for the long lyrics but the song is so her that I wasn't sure which part to put <3
Enjoy as much as you can :'
*
The boys, the girls, they all like Carmen
She gives them butterflies, bats her cartoon eyes
She laughs like God, her mind's like a diamond
Buy her tonight, she's still shining
Like lightning, oh, like lightning
*
Carmen, Carmen, staying up 'til morning
Only seventeen, but she walks the streets so mean
It's alarming, truly, how disarming you can be
Eating soft ice cream, Coney Island queen
She says, "you don't want to be like me
Looking for fun, get me high for free
I'm dying, I'm dying"
She says, "you don't want to get this way
Street walk at night, and a star by day"
(Carmen- LDR)
My mom was gone in the morning as she had promised and I didn't know what to think about it. I didn't know what to think about anything anymore.
Prom was in a week which was insane. In one week, most of the things were going to change. It was so short thinking like that. But one week, was too much to bear as well. It meant one more week of sneaking around, one week filled with lies.
Don't deprive yourself for someone else.
My mom's voice echoed in my head. Was this depriving myself?
I was going on dates with a boy who I didn't have interest in dating. I was dating my best friend's prom date who she was seeing since the first year. I was asking their best friends to keep this as a secret. Even my ex boyfriend who cheated on me had humiliated me about this.
Was I a bad person?
What I did, what we did was bad. But would it make me a bad person?
I just wanted to love for the first time and I was lucky to be loved in return. Why did our love had to hurt this many people? When had a small attraction turned into something I could easily call love.
I remembered my mother's words about mistaking what she felt for my dad with love. I knew what I felt. I wasn't scared of calling it love. Was this the proof of I was actually young?
I sighed with pain. Doorbell ringing interrupted my thoughts. I answered it and saw it was Ethan. He quickly wrapped his arms around me. My mind was too busy to hold him back. He held me tight and smelled my hair.
"God I was so worried when Damiano said you didn't come home for the night."
Wasn't this love?
What was it then?
YOU ARE READING
Smoke of His Breath // Ethan Torchio
FanfictionI saw him lit himself a cigarette. He jammed it between his lips and took a deep breath. He breathed out, setting the smoke free. I watched the smoke of his breath dance around the air and disappear. For some reason, the smoke took my attention more...
