Smoke of His Breath // Ethan Torchio

lesson 34: favors should be returned

Hellooo! I'm at my grandparents' country house for the week. There isn't much to do except for studying, reading and writing so I hope I can write a lot. 

Enjoy,

The truth is I am a toy
That people enjoy
'Til all of the tricks don't work anymore

...

They say, "You're a little much for me
You're a liability
You're a little much for me"
So they pull back, make other plans
I understand, I'm a liability

(Liability- Lorde)

*

I skipped school the day after our argument with Miruna. Ethan had offered to stay with me but considering his record, it wouldn't be right for him to skip school for no reason. Not when he was so close to actually graduating.

In the second of the two days I had went over to Damiano's. Marlena was with him so it was a good change to spend time with her. Ethan had came over after school as well.

Today was the third day since our argument and I still didn't feel like going to school. I looked at time. If I wanted to go, I had to got up and get ready as soon as possible. I didn't feel like it so I curled up in my bed. What Miruna had said was keeping my mind too busy. I knew I wasn't the best of friends, not since I had asked her 'flirt' to help me get his best friend. But I never thought I was the one to expect everything to be about me. I always thought she was that person. She was the one with the spot light. For the first time in my life, I actually had put my priorities first. For the first time I had felt like I was as important as she was. I never had thought this would be the outcome of it. I had never thought my best friend would hate me for it.

Ethan had offered to arrange a meeting for Miruna and I but I had refused. She had told me everything she had to say. I had told her more than I had in mind. So the deal was closed. There was no need to push it further.

After laying in bed for a while more, I received a text. I reached to my phone. It was from Thomas.

Hey Carmen! You weren't around for few days now. Is everything okay?

Knowing that he cared about me made me feel a  little better.  I texted him that everything was okay and I just wasn't feeling well. He offered to meet up after school. Even though I didn't feel like it, I could use a distraction. Damiano was going to go to Hanna's aunt's house and Ethan was supposed to work at his dad's shop. Rather than spending all afternoon together, I sure could go out with Thomas.

I got out of the bed and took a shower. I was laying around since morning so it had felt great to actually clean up a little bit. Without getting dressed, I wrapped a towel around my body and went to kitchen to eat something. I made myself coffee and I found frozen patisserie in the fridge. I put that in the microwave and ate it once it was ready.

I went back to my room to get dressed. I wore black mom jeans, a gray plain shirt and black zip-up. I wanted to put my hair into a ponytail but Ethan had traumatized me about it. Whenever I tie my hair he would find an opportunity and take the hair tie off of my hair.

I left the house. Thomas had told me to meet him in this coffee shop near school. Weirdly, I didn't feel too  excited this time. Maybe I had gotten used to talk to him. Maybe Ethan's lessons had pay off. Or maybe I still had Miruna in my mind that it was hard to focus on a date. Which, might not be a date but I wasn't sure what else to call it.