Snowflake

Nine

James signals for me to come to the backyard, and I follow him. I sit down on the wet grass with no regard for my pants and hug my knees. Which is the most talkative pose you could think of. This can't even be considered a backyard. It is just a literal square of grass, but it is a pretty night. The sky is filled with stars and the breeze smells like raindrops.

" Are you all right? " Asked James.

I don't know how to answer this question at the moment.

" Yep. " It's what I actually said.

" It doesn't look like it. " James said, sounding genuinely concerned.

 " I don't mean to be rude but, why do you care? "

" I just do. You seem like a true mystery and I like to play detective sometimes. " He laughs at his own comment.

" I love when people describe me as a thing; it's always so flattering. "

Those words just came out of my mouth. What I wanted to do was stay quiet and try not to puke out of the disgust I felt from that statement. My brain and mouth connection decided to take a break tonight.

" Huh. You've got opinions too? That is even better. "

" Can't girls have opinions? "

James made a face that was almost if someone had just ripped the brakes out of his car.

" That's not what I-..."

" I know; I am kidding. " He looked at me confused." Yes, way too many of them to be honest. " I finished.

" Where is all this coming from? "

" Probably from inside me, I would guess the pancreas area. "

He laughed, but at me this time.

" Huh. " He managed to let out before the long uncomfortable quiet that fell between us.

It was maybe a second but my experience with conversations is very little so it seemed like a lot longer. James's eyes were wondering around to the sky and then back to the ground, like he was looking for something.

" You just never talk in class, maybe it is wrong of me but like..." This time it was as if his flirtatious character voice had finally gone away. It felt honest, like I was talking to a real human being, not a popularity machine. It was the same way he apologized in the closet. To me it felt as if James had two personalities, the person he pretends to be, and then actually him. I would just like to know why he hides behind the jerk mask most of the time. This one is so much better.

" You didn't think I had a personality. " I rebutted.

" Kind of. Is that too bad? "

" Kind of. "

" Also since we are on embarrassing topics. What is your name? "

That just made that game about a hundred times worse, if there was a rock here I would probably do the world a favor by throwing it at him.

" Seriously, you were going to kiss me without even knowing my name? "

" Oh really, do you know mine? "

" No, but I wasn't going to kiss you. "

" Really, you didn't even think about it for a second? " He asked, staring at me, which made me feel uneasy.

" No, but I assume you thought about it for many seconds cause that face you made was terrifying. "

Honesty is key, maybe it is important for him to know that he's kissing face is not as " hypnotizing " as he may think. It could be giving innocent young girls some nightmares.