Snowflake

Four

I am organizing the last things for school tomorrow. Packing my backpack, choosing what still deserves a shot to be used in my pencil case, writing a study plan that I won't follow. It sounds very composed and organized but the anxiety is really starting to kick-in now. That feeling of being anxious for no apparent reason and then not even remembering why I was nervous in the first place. That is how I feel every first day of school.

The clock points at seven, and I am laying on my bed reading with Nate and Savannah. Who are covering my pants with cat hair. My mission was to read more of Stephen King this year in my pursuit to be"edgy". I feel brave just by buying these books, the three old people at my local bookstore look at me with respect. Sometimes I even walk around the store twice just to parade my new scary book. Until I open them at home, and feel scared and not edgy at all.

Reading is one of my favorite things to do, escaping to a different world through words. My life motto is: When you can't have something in real life, read about it. That is why I started reading romance books.

"Sloan!" My dad called from the living room.

"Yes?"

"We are going to order Pizza. Are you hungry?"

"Yeah, obviously. Do you guys maybe also want to watch a movie?" I answered, hoping maybe a movie will take my mind off of things.

"Sure. We need to spend as much time as we can with our baby girl." He said while I internally cringed.

Half an hour later the pizza is on the center table, as we are sitting on the comfy living room couch. I accessed my comfortable mode, wrapped myself up in a blanket like a burrito, put my glasses on and fuzzy socks.

The amazing smell of pizza and carbs just took over the living room. I grab the remote and open Netflix. As soon as the logo pops up my dad starts saying that we should watch a romantic comedy. Which I don't agree with, but obviously he kept insisting until I just gave him the remote.

"I thought we were watching the polar bear documentary. " I said.

" Not today." George answered, still staring at the tv and pressing the buttons at the lowest speed I have ever seen.

My dad is a romantic. He believes in the good in people and singing birds. He said I inherited his fertile imagination. Which is debatable, some people like my past English teacher used to say that: "I think so out of the box, that I lost the box already." He never said that you could not turn an American history essay into a Hamilton fanfic.

My dad took a million years to choose the movie. I was sitting down on the couch eating my second slice of Artichoke pizza when he finally said "done".

He chose Mean Girls. Mean Girls! I do not want to watch a movie that has mean in its title and is not horror related. If I wanted to watch a movie about teenage stupidity I would choose it myself.

After the first half hour of me denying the fact that my eyes were enduring that. I actually started to like it. Only the party scenes were the ones that made me really uncomfortable. People getting drunk and kissing each other is just weird. You don't want to have your first kiss intoxicated and not remember it. Or that's what I think, from my zero experience in both kissing and drinking. I just wouldn't want to do anything intoxicated, my reflexes are already so slow that if alcohol supposedly lowers them even more, I would just turn into a human potato.

Through the whole movie I weirdly feel like I am third wheeling. My parents know all of the lines because according to them this movie is a "cult classic". Vincent even paused at some points to show me how people dressed in the early two thousands.

After all of that, I just decided to go to bed avoiding having to tell my dad I actually liked the movie. Instead I am laying in bed listening to calming music and staring at the ceiling. Just trying to relax so I can have a good night of sleep and confront my day tomorrow.

I turn off the lights, both of my cats are already accommodated on both sides of my legs. Meaning I can only find a comfortable position in between a 15 centimeter area. The only sound is my hedgehog chewing his vegetables. That is the fun part about having a hedgehog. They are nocturnal animals, which means that when I go to sleep he is awake so I don't feel so lonely. Sometimes when I can't sleep I just watch him walk around and drink water; it's so adorable.

As my eyes are starting to finally glue together my mind goes to a completely different place, one with no images, just an endless dark. With my head laying on my comfortable Star Wars pillow.